A mother noticed that it was about time for school to dismiss and since it looked like it would rain, she drove toward the school to pick up her eight year old daughter. She turned down the street to see her daughter running towards her down the sidewalk.
A lightning bolt flashed and the little girl looked up towards the sky, smiled, and then began running towards her mother's car. Another lightning bolt flashed and again the little girl looked towards the sky, smiled and resumed running. This happened several more times until the little girl finally arrived at where her mother was parked. Her mom immediately inquired as to the strange behavior. "Why did you keep stopping and smiling at the sky;" she asked her daughter.
"I had to, mommy. God was taking my picture."

Q. Why did Kenny take a ladder to school?
A. He wanted to go to high school!

Q. What do you get from a nervous cow?
A. Milkshakes

Q. Why shouldn't you tell a joke while you're ice skating?
A. Because the ice might crack up.

Q. What do you give a lemon when its hurt?
A. Lemonade.

Q. What starts with T, ends with T and has T in it?
A. A tea pot

Q. What did the rug say to the floor?
A. Don't move, I've got you covered

Q. What has holes and holds water?
A. A sponge

Q. What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?
A. Stinkerbell

Q. Which is the longest rope?
A. Europe!

There was a man that fell out of a plane.
Fortunately there was a hay stack under him,
Unfortunately there was a pitch fork in the hay,
Fortunately he didn't land on the pitch fork,
Unfortunately he didn't land on the hay!

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