They make ya laugh. They make ya cry. Sometimes they just make ya cock your head to the side and go "Huh?" This page is dedicated to some of those wonderful Superman quotes.
Clark: Lately I've been hearing things, y'know? Things I couldn't hear before. Like...like over there, Jenny's telling Pete Ross her parents are going out tonight.
Lana: That little tart!
Lana: You can see through walls? So, how many times have you peeked into the girls' locker room, huh?
Jor-El: Be brave, my son. Remember who you are and the legacy you carry inside you.
Clark: I'm not a freak. I'm not. I'm not!
Lois: Chief, I spent a week on the docks with rats and frizzed hair exposing the biggest gun-smuggling ring to hit this town in ten years, and what makes the front page? Some sprouty new-age granola-crunching fluff piece on angels.
Perry: Good timing, Lois. I want you to be the first to know I'm hiring a new guy on the city desk.
Lois: Is he cute?
Perry: What was that? Can anyone tell me?
Jimmy: Looks like a flying guy.
Lois: Nice 'S'.
Lois: He's strong, he flies...he's the ideal Nietzschian fantasy all wrapped up in a red cape - a Superman.
Jonathan: It doesn't matter where you were born or what you can do - you'll always be Clark Kent. Superman just helps out now and then.
Martha: Still, it wouldn't hurt if people knew a little more about Superman. I don't want anyone thinking you're like that nut in Gotham City.
Lois: Nice work, Smallville. You're only the second person I've seen get under Lex's skin.
Clark: Who's the first?
Lois: Me. When I dumped him.
Feeding Time
LeBeau: Adios...freak.
Henderson: She must've been delerious when our boys found her. Said something about being attacked by a purple monster.
Jimmy: Heh heh. Was its name Barney?
Henderson: You here to make ha-ha, kid, or take pictures?
Jimmy: I guess that's a no.
My Girl
Lois: The only thing holding that dress up is faith.
Reporter: Lana, are the jewels real?
Lana: Everything's real, boys.
Lana: Just because I'm gorgeous doesn't mean I'm stupid.
Lana: We make such a perfect team!
Superman: No.
Lana: I could be your trusty sidekick, your Dr. Watson, your Batgirl.
Superman: Definitely no!
Clark: Lana, I told you I didn't want you spying on Luthor anymore.
Lana: I wasn't spying. I was sitting right next to him.
Lana: Clark Kent, I swear if you say I'm like a sister to you, I'm going back to Lex.
The Main Man
Lobo: Oh yeah, someone is definitely tired o' breathin'!
Preserver: You are Lobo - assassin, brigand, sociopath, monster...
Lobo: Ya left out scourge of the cosmos.
Angela: After careful analysis, experts agree it's a scroungy biker on a flying motorcycle.
Lois: I'm confused, Kent. See, I've lived in Metropolis most of my life and I can't figure out how some yokel from Smallville is suddenly getting every hot story in town.
Clark: Well, Lois, the truth is I'm actually Superman in disguise and I only pretend to be a journalist in order to hear about disasters as they happen and then squeeze you out of the byline.
Lois: You're a sick man, Kent.
Clark: You asked.
Lobo: The name's Lobo. That's L as in lacerate, O as in obliterate, B as in disembowel, and O as in - uh, guess I can use obliterate twice, huh?
Lobo: Mmm. I love you too.
Lobo: Now, the more you move, the worse it'll hurt, so feel free to go crazy.
Lois: Give 'em one for me. Make it a dozen!
Lobo: Ding-dong! Lobo calling!
Preserver: How could I ever think trash like you was worth saving?
Lobo: I got a cute smile?
Ghost in the Machine
Lois: What went wrong, Lex? Premature product launch?
Father's Day
Clark: When I finish this story, I press a button and it'll go straight to the editor's desk.
Jonathan: Heck, that could save you five or six whole steps.
The Hand of Fate
Thief: "I am power beyond your dreams. Call to me. Karkull come siver kull, Karkull come tamber say..." Yeah, right. Singin' polly-wolly-doodle all day.
Jimmy: What do I need a picture of, Luthor kissing a donkey?
Jimmy: Holy - !
Lois: Bad choice of words, Jimmy.
Brave New Metropolis
Angela: My God, it's you, it's really you! You're alive after all these years!...Can you loan me a dollar?
Superman: You never knew how I felt about you. I never knew...until you were gone.
Lois: You could've said something! We could've talked about it, figured it out! Now look at you...married to Luthor.
Luthor: I'll tell them how you forced me to enslave them - how I stood between them, and your terrible wrath! And when I toss them your poisoned green carcass, I'll be more than their leader. I'll be their saviour.
Superman: Will the people ever trust me again?
Lois: It'll take time.
Superman: I've got the time. For them...and for you.
Superman: So that was me?
Lois: Yes...and no. It's complicated; I could explain it - over dinner?
Superman: Dinner? Aren't we getting a little personal?
Lois: Better now than never.
Solar Power
Luminus: Don't feel bad, Lois. It's not personal this time. I've got bigger fish to fry and frankly, you're just bait.
Lois: Oh yeah, that makes me feel better.
Lois: Look, up in the sky!
Jimmy: It's a bird.
Lois: Yeah, but what's it sitting on?
Speed Demons
Flash: Sorry I'm late - just woke up two minutes ago.
Captain: Superman!
Flash: And the Flash. Hold your applause.
Monkey Fun
Lois: Titano! Remember me? Lo-Lo?
Clark: "Lo-Lo"?
Lois: I was eight, okay?
Bibbo: Awright, Cheetah, you asked fer it! *whap* Bad monkey! Bad, bad monkey!
Lois: Don't hurt him, he's just a baby!...Okay, a really big baby.
Lois: Shut up and keep squeezing the monkeys!
Apokolips...Now!
Jimmy: This wasn't in the forecast!
Turpin: Hey, ya overgrown parrakeets! Take a snort o' this!
Toby: Geez, is he crazy?
Sawyer: Yeah.
Darkseid: Savour your moment of triumph, Superman. But remember, victory has its price.
Superman: In the end, the world didn't really need a Superman...just a brave one.
Little Girl Lost
Jimmy: I thought I knew all the interns.
Jimmy: Bingo!
Kara: What's that mean?
Jimmy: They're...the same.
Kara: Oh, right. Bingo!
Granny: I seek out the lost little lambs society has cruelly abandoned. I take them lovingly under my wings, give them the power they need to face the cold, heartless world...and kick its butt!
Granny: You naughty little monkey! Granny will spank you good!
Granny: I'm such an old pudding-head.
Amy: I can't believe Granny and all this stuff came from another planet.
Kara: I'm from another planet. It happens.
Kara: What a toilet.
Darkseid: I never settle. What I cannot have, I destroy.
Amy: Don't look at me. I didn't touch anything.
Jimmy: Where's a superhero when you need him?
World's Finest
Terrorist: Lane? Lois Lane?! The one Superman always saves?
Lois: 'Fraid so.
Lois: It might be nice to see each other when I'm not...I dunno, falling out a window or something.
Lois: "I understand, Lois." Really? You do? "Yup, you're a complete moron." Why thank you, Superman, I think I'm a total loser too.
Superman: I heard you were crazy. I didn't think you were stupid.
Lois: Don't be intimidated, Clark. Regale him with madcap tales of the nightlife in Smallville.
Joker: More powerful than a locomotive...and just about as subtle.
Harley: "Hey, Mista J, I'm Batman! Eat me, eat me, eat me!"
Lois: I'll get some iodine for tht scrape. Burning, stinging iodine.
Harley: Puddin'!
Batman: At this point, he probably is.
Harley: I wanna doctor! I wanna lawyer! I wanna cheese sandwich!
Bruce: She's all yours now, if you can handle her. But you'd better be good to her...cuz I know where you live.
Where There's Smoke
Volcana: The whistle was touched by the President's lips.
Donny: What wasn't?
Kurt: You've been bad, Volcana.
Volcana: You've been worse. Now that we've recapped the past two years...
Lois: Oh, now there's a headline - "No fire in hotel room."
Knight Time
Roxy: Don't all you Spandex boys have meetings or something?
Robin: Batman, Schmatman. I got this down. ...Or not.
Robin: So Bruce is being controlled by aliens? Ugh!
Superman: I'm deeply hurt.
Brainiac: You're every bit the detective your followers on the Internet believe.
New Kids in Town
Chamelion Boy: You asked for heroes. You didn't say anything about sanity.
Lana: What's this strange power you have?
Clark: Whaddya mean?
Lana: The ability to attract every airhead in Smallville.
Clark: Like a pair of glasses is gonna fool anyone.
Clark: Red underpants? Now I know you're crazy.
Saturn Girl: I guess we do seem a little...
Clark: Um, freaky?
Kenny: Hey, check out Darth Vader! Que pasa, man? Take a wrong turn at Tattooine?
Chamelion Boy: Up, up and away! I always wanted to say that.
Absolute Power
Superman: Evil triumphs when good men do nothing.
Little Big Head Man
Superman: Life am good.
In Brightest Day...
Kyle: Wait! Don't you wanna talk first? Y'know, banter back and forth to prove your innate superiority?
Sinestro: No.
Kyle: I'm just an artist! I doodle in the margins of notepads! I dream about colour and form and monster trucks! I spend half my life in a fantasy world!
Superman: You sound perfect.
Superman's Pal
Lois: Have a seat and I'll teach you the 'angry phone voice'.
Lois: Hold it right there! First of all, Superman saved us from Luminus, not the other way around, and second...what am I, chopped liver?
Clark: Aww, I'm sure Superman likes you too.
Tina: So how do you call Superman?
Jimmy: I yell, same as anyone else.
Metallo: Careful. We don't want to damage our collateral just yet.
Tina: Speak for yourself. You didn't have to spend an evening with him.
Lois: I gotta start wearing pants!
A Fish Story
Lois: Sounds like your assets are getting kicked.
Lois: Did he say 'king'? Just when you think you know a guy...
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