Movies S-Z

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The Shining

Jack- "Here's to five miserable months on the wagon and all the irreperable harm that it has caused me."

Jack- "Wendy, Darling, Light of my Life. I'm not gonna hurt you, I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm just gonna bash your brains in. I'm gonna bash them right the fuck in!"

Jack- "That's a crock a shit."

Jack-"Heeeere's Johnny!"

So I Married an Axe Murderer

Charlie- "Evil, like the froo-it of the devil, evil."

Charlie- "Scotland has it's own martial arts. It's called fuck you."

Stuart- "Heed, pants, now!"

Stuart- "Heed, paper, now! Move that melon of yours if you can. Haulin' that gargantuan cranium about. I'm not kiddin' that boy's head is like Sputnik--spherical but quite pointy in parts. That was offsides wasn't it? He'll be crying himself to sleep tonight on his huge pilla."

Stuart- "William move your head! Look at the size of that boys head. I'm not kiddin' it's like an orange on a toothpick."
Charlie- "You're gonna give the boy a complex."
Stuart- "Well that's a huge noggin, it's a virtual planetoid, has it's own weather system. Heed, move!"

Space Balls

Helmet- "What the hell am I looking at, when does this happen in the movie?"
Col. Sanders- "Now, you're looking at now, everything that happens now is happening now."
Helmet- "What happened to then?"
Col. Sanders- "We're past then."
Helmet- "When?"
Col. Sanders- "Now. We're at now now."
Helmet- "Go back to then."
Col. Sanders- "When?"
Helmet- "Now."
Col. Sanders- "Now?"
Helmet- "Now."
Col. Sanders- "I can't."
Helmet- "Why?"
Col. Sanders- "We missed it."
Helmet- "When."
Col. Sanders- "Just now."
Helmet- "When will then be now?"
Col. Sanders- "Soon."

Helmet- "Come back here you fat bearded bitch!"

Helmet- "What's the matter Colonel Sanders, chicken?"

Helmet- "The combination is 1,2,3,4,5. That's the stupidest combination I've ever heard in my life. That's the kind of thing an idiot would have on his luggage."
Scroob- "Do you have the key."
Col. Sanders- "It worked sir, we have the combination."
Scroob- "Great, now we can take every last breath of fresh air from planet Druidia. What's the combination?"
Col. Sanders- "1,2,3,4,5."
Scroob- "1,2,3,4,5. That's amazing I have the same combination on my luggage."

Helmet- "Evil will always triumph because good is dumb."

Col. Sanders- "She's gone from suck to blow."

Col. Sanders, Scroob & Helmet- "Suck, suck, suck."

Helmet- "I am you father's brother's nephew's cousin's former room mate."
Lonestar- "So what does that make us?"
Helmet- "Absolutely nothing."

Helmet- "You have the ring. And I see your schwartz is as big as mine. Let's see how well you handle it."

Helmet- "I bet she gives great helmet."

Tommy Boy

Tommy- "Bees! Bees in the car! They're ripping my flesh off!"

Tommy- "You better pray to the god of the skinny punks that this wind doesn't pick up, because if it does, I'm gonna come over their and jam an oar up your ass!"

Tommy- "Son of a. . . that's gonna leave a mark."

Tommy- "Fat guy in a little coat. Fat guy in a little coat."

Tommy- "Richard, who's favorite Little Rascal? Is it Alfalfa or is it Spanky?"

Tommy- "What'd you do?"

Richard- "Me and my fellow nerds will retire to the nerdery with our calculators."

Tommy- "You can get a good look at a t-bone by sticking your head up a bull's ass but wouldn't you rather take the butcher's word for it."

Tommy- "I was just checkin' the specs on the rotarty girder. . . I'm retarded."

Tommy- "You can get a good look at a butcher's ass by sticking your head up there but wouldn't you rather take his word for it?"

True Lies

Helen- "Did you ever kill anyone?"
Harry- "Yeah but they were all bad."

Wag the Dog

Dustin Hoffman- "Oh my, oh, oh, wait a minute, he's not dead, he's not--(gunshot) scratch that."

Conrad- "You can never tell anyone you did this."
Girl- "What can they do to me?"
Conrad- "They can come home to your house and kill you."

The Wedding Singer

Robbie- "Sir, one more outburst like that and I'll have to strangle you with my microphone cord."