PART
SEVEN
Chakotay
was at his wits' end. B'Elanna glared at him. Owen junior wiggled in her arms
although he was only two months old.
"Have
you given her formula?" she asked. They were in his part of their joint
quarters and it looked a mess. Clothes lay scattered around him and Carina's
toys were all over. A square baby comforter was spread out on the floor and
Carina had lain on it before he picked up the restless baby to try and soothe
her.
"Yes,
I've given her formula. Mariah helped me bathe her and Marla Gilmore took her to
the holodeck this morning. Noah sang for with her and Susan played the oboe.
Naomi lent Carina her precious targ. Nothing helps. She hasn't stopped crying,
B'Elanna."
"What
did the Doctor say?"
"Why
are you barking at me?" he asked, feeling harassed.
"What
did he say?" B'Elanna insisted as if she accused him of pinching the baby.
"We
haven't been to sickbay. I don't know what's wrong - "
"Take
her to sickbay now," B'Elanna ordered and half pushed him towards the door
of his quarters. "I'll tidy up here."
"There's
nothing - "
"Go,
Chakotay, before you have everyone worried about the baby."
Chakotay
rocked the baby gently, tried to quieten her. It was twenty four hours since
Kathryn had left the ship to enjoy her shore leave and Carina had been restless
and cried most of the time. She had been fine during the day, but when night
came, Carina sensed Kathryn wasn't there. That was when she started fretting and
she hadn't stopped since. Kathryn would be away for three days and this was only day
one. How was he going to cope with the squalling child? When he was outside the
cabin, striding down the corridor as fast as he could to the nearest turbolift,
he was accosted by Samantha Wildman.
"Commander,
Carina still crying?" she asked, unnecessarily, since Carina's bawling
could be heard practically all over the ship.
"She
doesn't like me right now, Sam," he complained as he entered the turbolift.
"You
might want to have her examined by the EMH," she suggested. "He'll
give her something, I'm sure. "
How
many passing crew suggested the same thing? He felt mildly irritated but tried
to remain upbeat. They were only trying to help. Hadn't Kathryn said the same
thing three months ago? That day he threw her offer right back in her face.
"Hopefully
he'll tell me what's the matter with her," he replied. Sam stood in the
corridor looking at him through the still open turbolift doors.
"What?" he said, a little confused..
"It's
not difficult to see what's the matter, Commander," she said, smiling.
"They call it separation anxiety."
Before
he had time to reply, the doors closed and the turbolift resounded with the
child's cries which had turned to screams. He felt like climbing the walls of
the lift. He had not had a full hour of sleep since the previous day and his
nerves were frayed at the edges. He wished he had a calming influence on his
daughter. The past three months it had been wonderful seeing her blossom with
Kathryn. But Carina had bonded with him too and recently started smiling when he
made cooing noises for her. He had begun to feel oddly jealous that Carina
leaned towards Kathryn more than she did towards her own father.
Maybe
she had a tummy bug. He dismissed that idea, thinking that he would have noticed
the results of it although she had refused to eat or drink her formula. What was
it Sam had said about anxiety? He couldn't remember. He touched the baby's cheek
and feeling like he wanted to cry himself. She felt warm, feverish. He guess it
was her crying, but it was prudent to let the EMH determine what was wrong with
her. Either that, or he was too blind to see what was so obvious or denying the
truth of it.
"Hey,
sweetie, we're going to see Doctor. You know Doctor? Yes, the one who delivered
you...that one..."
Carina
had stopped crying abruptly when he mentioned the doctor and Chakotay gave a
sigh of relief. The relief was short-lived, though. The next moment the
hysterical crying started again. As the turbolift doors opened he hastened
outside and almost ran down the corridor to sickbay.
"What's
wrong with the baby, Commander?" a concerned crewman asked.
"I'm
hoping the doctor can tell me."
"I
sure hope he can help, Commander. Baby's been fretful since the Captain
left." Meryck Lando stressed the 'captain'.
"Thank
you, Meryck. You're a real comfort."
The
crewman smiled. "Glad I could help, Commander."
********
"And
what can I do for you, Commander?"
Chakotay,
frustrated at the way the baby cried, barked, "Can you please make her stop
crying?"
"Fine,
I'll give her a shot of brandy. That should do the trick," the EMH quipped.
"Doctor..."
"OK,
let's see what we can do for this sweet little thing," he said, taking the
child from Chakotay. The doctor held Carina up, looked into her eyes. She had
stopped crying, and hiccoughed as she squared off with the doctor. "Your
Daddy tells me you won't stop crying."
Carina gurgled, her cheeks tear stained. Chakotay breathed easier for a
few seconds when Carina tried to touch the EMH's face. Suddenly, her face
crumpled and the crying started over again. "Oh, my..."
"See,
Doctor? I don't know what to do with her," Chakotay said, exasperated.
"It has been a continuous wail the last twenty four hours. Even during the
night... Especially during the night."
The
doctor put Carina on the biobed, and started examining her. "She's not wet,
there's no tummy bug, no ear ache, she's not hungry..." he said as he kept
scanning. Carina, diverted by the shiny scanner, stopped again, only to start
her whimpering when the EMH put the scanner back in the tricorder.
The
doctor lifted the baby into his arms, tried to placate her by patting her back
gently. Chakotay watched, uncertain what to do next. The baby missed Kathryn, he
knew, but he hadn't wanted to hail her on Adromax and alert her that Carina
wanted to be in her company. She had made it pretty clear to him she didn't want
to be disturbed. Did he see a light go up in the doctor's eyes?
"You
know of course, Commander, that your daughter has bonded with the woman who
breastfed her."
"Yes...I
realise that."
"Follow
me," he said, moving towards the sickbay doors and Chakotay, struck mute
for a minute, wondered what the doctor was planning to do.
Moments
later they were next door, in the nursery, where the doctor walked straight to
the small alcove. Chakotay followed, frowning as the doctor stopped near the
rocking chair. Lately, B'Elanna had been breastfeeding Owen there. He hadn't
been to the nursery in a while. The EMH smiled as he handed the baby to
Chakotay. A terry robe, in soft white had been hanging on a hook against one
panel. The doctor took the robe and held it in his hands like something
precious. Kathryn used it whenever
she was feeding Carina.
Carina
nuzzled her face against the EMH in a restless, agitated motion, crying
plaintively this time.
"Doctor,
what - ?" Chakotay started, then it dawned on him. Like a thunderbolt, the
realisation struck deep into his heart.
The
EMH held the robe to the baby, nuzzled it against her face, then pulled it away,
smiling knowingly as both saw how Carina raised her head and leaned towards the
robe.
"Like
most animal young, Commander, they operate on smell. Carina, as I've often said
in the beginning, has the Captain's smell as part of her memory. Look at
her..."
Carina's
whimpering stopped as she rubbed her face into the robe, then started gurgling,
smiling through her tears.
"Spirits..."
whispered Chakotay. "Oh spirits..."
"Here,
take your child and take the robe." Chakotay complied, too stunned to say
anything further.
"Commander,
now you know what you must do. Meanwhile, I'm going back to sickbay, and don't
bring that child to me unless she's due for a medical or something's drastically
wrong with her..."
The
doctor vanished, leaving Chakotay gaping.
The
baby was happily pulling the cloth to her mouth and sucking like mad. Chakotay
thought that at three months and born prematurely, Carina was developing fast,
or normal as B'Elanna would have it. She was finally quiet and Chakotay breathed
a huge sigh of relief. The whole night he had been awake tending to the baby, he
had been thinking of Kathryn down on Andromax and her role in his daughter's
life. A germ of a thought then, now suddenly sprouted furiously as he looked at
his baby lying quietly in his arms.
"Carina,
there is something I have to do, and sweetie, you're going to help Daddy,
right?" he spoke to the little baby who seemed to take no notice of him and
whose eyes had already started drooping. "So much for paying attention to
your elders..." he mumbled as he wrapped Carina gently in Kathryn's robe
and hit his commbadge.
"Chakotay
to Kim."
"Aye,
Commander."
"I
need a favour. Relieve Tuvok at the bridge at 1700. I'll rearrange our shifts as
soon as I return..."
"Aye,
Commander. Has Carina been giving you grief?"
"Chakotay
out."
He
walked to his quarters first and gathered some things for the baby before making
his way to the transporter room. Ensign Torrence looked up in surprise when
Chakotay entered, a hold-all slung over one shoulder and carrying the sleeping
baby wrapped in a terry robe.
"We
have not cleared babies under six months - "
"Carina
will be fine. Just beam us down, will you? Here are the co-ordinates..."
Torrence
looked at the PADD, then frowned as he entered the co-ordinates and waited for
Chakotay to take his place on the transporter pad.
"Commander,
these are Captain - "
"I'm
very well aware of where I'm going, Torrence. Ready?"
"Aye,
Commander."
The
next moment, Chakotay, touching the face of his little golden haired angel,
dematerialised and transported to the given coordinates. He blinked furiously
as the bright sun hit him square in the eyes.
A
quick investigation into the depths of the robe assured him that Carina was
fine; she was in fact still sleeping. Chakotay smiled tenderly, then on an
impulse bent down and kissed Carina's cheek. The baby didn't stir.
He
looked around him. They were near a market place and here and there he could see
the uniforms of the Voyager crew.
"Lovely
day for it, Commander!"
"Good
day, Commander. What a surprise to see you planetside."
"I
thought you're on duty, Chakotay," Dalby's voice rang quite close to him
and when he turned, saw Dalby holding Marla Gilmore's hand.
"The
baby wanted to come for a walk," he replied, then moved in the direction of
the end of the marketplace.
"But
isn't that the Captain's robe? Commander?"
"Good
for her. She's not crying, Commander. How...uh, peaceful."
Chakotay
ignored the easy teasing of the crew and walked towards the far end. It was
relatively quiet there and once he looked into the contents of Kathryn's robe to
check on Carina. She had opened her eyes and lay sucking the gown again. Did she
sense where they were going?
The
small locale consisted only of about ten houses. Kathryn had, much against her
will, given him information of her whereabouts in case of any emergency.
Although she had her commbadge activated at all times, no one had to disturb
her.
"But
I've no choice, Carina. We have to put our best foot forward today, or else
we're going to scare the Captain and then what will become of us?"
Carina
lay, ignoring his musings, just once turning her head to fix brilliant blue eyes
on him. His heart contracted a second. She looked so much like Seven; it hit him
in the gut every time. It was easier now, though once or twice he had vivid
dreams in which Seven was still alive, laughing like any young woman in love and
happy at the prospect of becoming a mother. He had to become used to looking at
Carina and try to put her mother's death behind him. It hadn't been easy, but he
was getting there.
Now,
Kathryn...
He
gave a little sigh as he neared the small house where Kathryn was staying.
Can
I count on you as my friend? I need you...
My
daughter needs more than just a provider of food, Kathryn...
"It's
now or never, Carina," he whispered softly to the baby.
The
front door, surprisingly, stood open. Chakotay gave a soft knock anyway and
stepped inside. Already, his tricorder had picked up her presence in the house
so she was home. He settled the baby against him, and cursed himself for not
bringing her in the strollers the crew used for the toddlers.
In a
small lounge, light coming through a window at opposite end, Kathryn sat in a
large comfy chair, her feet curled up under her, holding a book in her hand.
"Kathryn?"
She
looked up. Chakotay thought she looked beautiful, aloof, at peace as she rested
the book in her lap, though leaving it open.
"What
are you doing here, Chakotay? Is something wrong with Carina?" Her concern
was palpable, immediate.
"No
- no... there nothing wrong with Carina.... Kathryn, there's something wrong with
Carina..."
What
the hell was he doing?
Kathryn
rose to her feet. Without her boots, she looked even smaller, and barely reached
his shoulder.
"She's
wearing my robe, I see."
"Yes,
Kathryn, it was the only thing that - that could stop her crying. She's been
crying non-stop since you left..."
"All
the time?"
Kathryn's
eyes misted as she touched the baby, whose face promptly broke into a smile.
"And
we - I..."
"What
is it, Chakotay? You seem flustered."
"We
didn't want to disturb you. But Carina, she - "
"Chakotay..."
"Kathryn,
will you marry us, please?"
*************
End Part seven