The Offical Wes Stewart Top Ten Guide to becoming A Millionare



1. Inherit a Million Dollars or so from a dead relative. One of the best ways to accomplish this is to get very close to the relative. At the same time feed them alot of fatty foods, and buy them alocohol and smokes to possibly hurry up their life as to futher yours. Sure to some people this may seem like you are using your family members for money, and may even call you a killer....to those people I say...."You make me sick" Of course you may have guilt later and end up killing yourself to cure your guilt problems.


2. Here is a nice and honest method, it isn't a good method but it can work. Get a good job, and save your money, invest in 401k plans, put alot of money in a savings account. Sure Theoretically this will work, but you have to take into consideration that more than likely you would go made trying to do this after the first 5 years or so. It is not suggested.


3. Away from all that honesty crap, another good method is holding the world ransom with a nuclear weapon, or with the backstreet boys singing(cringes). You can find many references on the internet on how to make nuclear bombs, so this is a pretty reliable method. The only delima would be to find some plutonium, which if my calculations are correct, you will beable to buy that at any 7-eleven in about 3.56 years. With that knowledge, you can slack off and not work for the next 3.56 years, knowing that after that you will be a millionare.


4. Another way to become a millionare quick would be to become a drug lord. Either to teenagers, adults or even to school children. Of course your chances of getting murdered increases by about 56.79 fold, which unless you are a lucky man/woman, i wouldn't suggest it.


5. Aww...the American Dream.. TO win the lottery. This is by far one of the best ways to become a millionare considering the fact that you don't have to do hardly anything at all. Just go to a local lottery ticket seller and buy a ticket. Of course if you calculate the acutal chances of winning the lottery are so very slim, that you have a better chance of falling down in the shower and dying. So with that knowlege, you could start a pool with some neighbors of who will die in the shower first.


6. Another good method of becoming a millionare is to get involved in showbiz. There is an endless supply of money out there, because saps will pay there life savings just to meet there favorite movie star. The only problem is that your life will be on display for the public for the rest of your life, no matter what you do. And you will more than likely get depressed and commit suicide.


7. Solicite pornography to adults, young adults and even children. Your job will have great views and you will never want to call in sick for work.


8. Work for the Government and sell their secrets to communist and Nazi's and you'll be rich in no time. Except that no one will ever respect you ever again, you will be shunned everywhere, and if caught possibly even killed.


9. ......uh....
10. .....hmmmm


Ok So there are not really 10 methods to becoming a millionare. Well judgeing by the list it looks like the best ways of the 10, would be:
to take the world hostage with a nuclear weapon or sell solicite pornography to kids and young adults...

If you like this, then please email me and tell me why you like it, or send me lots of money. If you didn't like it, then let me just say this....EAT ME.