I Could Ask Him: Part 6

By Cobalt Doll

"So," says a surprisingly cold and feminine voice, "what are you in trouble for?"

"Uhh…" I reply intelligently. It's not my fault I'm struck dumb by the eyebrows. When she raises one of them it's almost too much.

"You are in trouble, right? You didn't just get tired and need to sit down?" She makes it sound like something only a certifiable retard would do.

"I'm in trouble!" I reply defensively.

"Well, what for?" she asks, flipping her long blonde hair. I suddenly get the feeling that it can't possibly be bad enough.

"I called my teacher a bitch and a whore," I say proudly. She smirks at me. I hate people who think that they're superior. "Yeah, so what did you do?" Her smirk deepens.

"I told my French 2 class that tomorrow I'm going to bring a gun to school and blow their fucking brains out," she replies lightly. I feel the sudden urge to move a little further down the bench.

"Oh…" I mutter. "That's… um… nice…"

"No," she replies. "It's not nice. That's why I'm here." I nod and move as far as possible away from her. She doesn't seem to notice, but if she does, I'm sure it's a source of great amusement. For the first time in living memory I actually want the door to open and the principal to come out. But time seems to have stopped, and I'm here with a homicidal maniac whose eyebrows alone could kill someone. Suddenly she turns to me, and I have to fight to not jump back and try to find sanctuary against the wall.

"Let's run away!" she says suddenly. "You and me! We'll go somewhere, get stoned, and come back tomorrow or so."

"Um…" I find myself using a lot of ellipses with this girl. Before I can recoil, she reaches out and grabs my wrist.

"I have a car. You can come. I'll drop you off not far if you don't want to shoot up. But you're coming with me." I shake my head violently. She ignores it, and before I know what to do, I'm dragged to me feet. Who would have guessed that someone so weird looking could be so strong.

"By the way," she adds, "I'm Dorothy Catalonia. Who the hell are you?"

"I'm not coming with you!"

"That's an interesting name… Are you from the Middle East?"

"Let go of me!"

"I guess not. You don't really look Arabian."

"If you don't let go of my hand I'm going to scream like a girl and bring the teachers outside!"

"You look like a girl already with that hair."

"SOMEBODY HELP ME!!"

"Stop being such a Nancy!"

"HILDE! QUATRE! WU-BEAR! HEERO! MRS. HARRIS!!" But we're out the door. "What the hell are you doing!" I shout at Dorothy. She gives me a look as though I'M the psycho here.

"To… my… car," she says, with slow, careful pronunciation. I let the implied insult slide, as there seem to be more important things to worry about.

"I don't wanna go!" I whine. Sharp, pointy nails dig into my skin.

"Tough shit kid," she replies. I'm tempted to try and explain why this is unfair, illegal, and downright immoral, but somehow I don't think she'd buy it. So I settle for continuing to shout like a moron.

"MRS. HARRIS!" She has to be able to hear, and for the first time in my life I'm disappointed not to see a she-man with crazy orange lips barrel towards me. Instead someone else does. Another person with split eyebrows.

"Dorothy!" he says sternly. It's a conspiracy. I know it. They're gonna kill me. I'm gonna die. Except, no, what a minute. He's kinda cute…

"Yes, Treize-san?" asks Dorothy. Her voice has suddenly slipped into a sugary-sweet tone that's about to give me a cavity.

"Are you trying to kidnap students again?" The so-called Treize asks. His voice sounds suddenly tired. Dorothy glances over at me, then down at my arm that she's still brutally clutching, and drops it.

"No…" she says slowly. "He was kidnapping me!" My jaw drops. I glance over at the man to see if he believes this. He takes several quick steps forward and grabs Dorothy by the ear. No, no, I guess he doesn't believe her.

"Ouch!" she shrieks. I blink. I think I just lost half of my hearing. Treize turns and flashes me an aristocratic smile before dragging the blonde to a car.

"I hope she hasn't caused you any trouble," he says, sounding very sincere. Trying not to turn into a small puddle of mush. I shake my head no. An engine starts, and then they're gone. Life is completely and in every way not fair that a bitch like that gets taken away in a small car by a guy like that. Sighing, I make my way back inside the building and sit down on the bench to wait. And wait. And wait...


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Copyright 2005