Pg xiii: Every Sunday morning, mainline Christian congregations across this country welcome into their fold newly baptized Christians, children of God. Within this liturgy, these congregations pledge their undying support to accept, love, forgive, and nurture this person in the faith. Yet the church honors this covenant selectively. For what was supposed to be a means of unconditional love, grace, and justice becomes a conditional covenant for lesbian and gay Christians – a compromise ending in silence, oppression, and judgment. It is this church that obstructs God’s grace and leads gay men and lesbians to doubt that they are children of God.
Page 2 & 3:
Almighty and everliving God, we beseech thee that of thine infinite
goodness thou wilt look upon Marilyn Adele Bennett and grant that by the aid of
thy Holy Spirit she may be steadfast in faith, joyful through hope, and rooted
in love, and that she may so live the life which now is, that she may enter
triumphantly the life which is to come; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
“Steadfast in faith.” I have been steadfast in the faith in that I have had to trust God and only God with my true self, for I cannot trust the church, my family, colleagues, the judicial system governing me, the military, my city council, the police force, my neighborhood watch group, my boss, or my sisters and brothers in the faith. I cannot trust the grace of my childhood. I can only trust God. So, yes, I have been established in the faith. I have also become cynical and skeptical in the faith, as well as distrustful, paranoid, intimidated, torn, fearful, and silent.
The silence is deafening. The silence is so loud that sometimes I cannot even hear the voice of God nor the proclamation of grace for me. The silence roars over the words offered as I receive the body and blood of Christ. The silence begs me, with church-sanctioned fear, to stay quiet, to remain hidden to avoid inviting shame.
Page 9: I have known about God and God’s love for me as long as I can remember. Some people recall the day they believed, and I surely can remember the day I joined the church or professed my faith. My Baptist family would say it was the day I was “saved.” Yet, I really do not recall that my profession of faith was a major leap from somewhere else. It was more like another step in my journey of faith. It certainly was joyous and wonderful, but I would not say that the heavens opened up and angels sang. I have known for as long as I can remember about the love of God in Jesus Christ.
I have also known for as long as I can remember that something was different about me.
Page 25: Recently, I
was part of a Bible study training course within my denomination. One evening as a group of us ate dinner, an
associate pastor from
Again, a mainline clergy person contributes to the silencing of many within the Church, including many of his own parishioners. The pastor assumes that no one in his congregation has had an abortion or has seen the earth’s destruction and felt fear. It does not cross his mind that at that very moment at his table, there sat at least one homosexual Christian man who definitely thinks the issue of gay liberation in the church is a critical issue. He could not have fathomed that this gay man could not even speak one word for fear of being revealed, outed, chastised, criticized, and destroyed. He, in his great concern for pastoring the “average man,” cut deeper the wound of rejection and pain.
How many lesbian and gay Christians hear these same silencing words every Sunday from their pastors and their laity?
Page 31: It is time now for the church-lay and clergy-to do just that. Gays/Lesbians need to be free in all places, especially within the community of faith. Suzanne Pharr (Homophobia, 45) states what she believes lesbians want, and in turn what I believe all homosexual Christians want.
We want the elimination of homophobia. We are seeking equality. Equality that is more than tolerance, compassion, understanding, acceptance, benevolence, for these still come from a place of implied seniority: favors granted to those less fortunate. . . . The elimination of homophobia requires that homosexual identity be viewed as viable and legitimate and as normal as heterosexual identity. It does not require tolerance; it requires equal footing.
Page 33-34: After several months of slogging through sober reality, I realized that my attraction to men had increased, not decreased. I became interested in a young man I had recently met, and I was devastated at my failure. I had done everything I was told to do with fervor. I had prayed and confessed and shared my most innermost secrets with others, including my sexuality. And yet my gay feelings were stronger than they had ever been. What had I done wrong?
In a state of near panic I sought the advice of an alcoholic who had sobered up many years before me. He was a married, middle-aged man who apparently had seen it all. I told him in detail the shame of my failure and begged him to help me correct my sin. I wanted to be good. I wanted God’s grace and love, but I didn’t know how to get it.
My friend asked me if I chose to be gay. I told him no. I had nearly killed myself with drink trying to make it go away. He asked me if my family had made me gay. Again the answer was no. My family, especially my father, was quick to condemn homosexuality in any context. My friend asked me if society had endeavored to make me gay. The answer was a firm no. I lived in constant fear of the ostracism that would follow if I were ever discovered. He then asked the question that I had never seriously considered before: “If all of these people did everything they could to keep you from being gay, and yet you are gay, who do you think made that happen? Who in this world has more power than every person in your life put together?
Page 44: Part of the problem is that many gay and lesbian Christians are frightened into silence. We want to worship fully, and we fool ourselves into thinking that we can leave part of ourselves outside the church doors and still fully participate. But how can we experience God’s grace if we are holding back? Silence smothers. Silence isolates.
Pages 111-119 Appendix A
Baptismal Covenant
Brothers and sisters in Christ:
Through the Sacrament of Baptism
we are initiated into God’s holy pathway.
We are incorporated into God’s mighty act of salvation
and given new birth through the water and the Spirit.
All this is God’s gift, offered to us without price
but certainly with great responsibility.
On behalf of the whole Body of the Liberating Christ, I ask you:
Do you renounce your participation in the social construct of
bigotry, hatred, and marginalization?
I do.
Do you accept the freedom and power God gives you
to resist evil, injustice, and oppression
in whatever forms they present themselves?
I do.
Do you proclaim Jesus Christ as your liberator,
put your whole trust in his grace,
and promise to work with him in doing justice,
in solidarity with the Body which Christ has offered to all
people?
I do.
According to the grace given to you,
will you act as justice-doers and love-makers
and be the Liberating Christ’s disciples in this world?
I will.
THANKSGIVING OVER THE WATER
[At this time the water may be poured into a large glass bowl in such a way that those gathered can see and hear the water; and then the following prayer is offered.]
The Liberator set you free.
The Freedom of Christ Be Yours Also.
Let us pray:
Eternal Lover,
When nothing existed but chaos,
you swept across the dark waters and brought forth light.
In the days of Noah
you saved those on the ark through the water.
After the flood you set in the clouds a rainbow.
When you saw your people as
slaves in
you led them to freedom through the sea.
Their children you brought
through the
to the land that you promised.
[Sing: “We Shall Overcome”]*
In the fullness of time you sent Jesus,
nurtured in the water and the womb.
He was baptized by John and anointed by your spirit.
He called his disciples
to share in the baptism of his death and resurrection
and to proclaim the liberating gospel to all people.
[Sing: “We’ll Walk Hand in Hand”]
Pour out your Holy Spirit,
and by this gift of water call to our remembrance
the grace and justice declared to us in our baptism.
For you did not silence us or call us stranger
but led us from out own wilderness times
into the Promised Lands of self-acceptance and thanksgiving.
You have set us as a rainbow in the sky
to be a sign of your unending cry for justice and liberation.
Praise to you, loving Spirit,
we hear your cry and we respond.
We will act-up with marches,
singing, and hosannas
until your will be done. Amen.
REAFFIRMATION OF FAITH
[We recommend that those gathered form a circle and the minister/facilitator begin the remembrance by touching the water and making the sign of the cross on the forehead of the person to the right or left, saying “Remember our baptism and be thankful.” That person then takes the water and marks the next person in the circle, repeating the remembrance phrase. After the water has gone around the entire circle and the minister/facilitator has been signed, together the group proclaims:]
We remember our baptism and
we are thankful.
We remember our baptism and
we are thankful.
We remember our baptism and
we are thankful.
BENEDICTION
Go forth for justice and liberation!
Great
Thanksgiving
For
National Coming Out Day
The Liberator set you free.
The freedom of Christ be yours also.
Open up your hearts.
We open them up to God.
Let us give thanks to the God that created us.
And the God
who nurtured us.
It is right, and a good and joyful thing,
always and everywhere to give thanks to you,
Lover of all people.
Creator of our loving.
Once we were a people living in closeted darkness, fearful of the truth of our radical loving, ashamed of the image of God that we embody. Once we waited in the shadows and allowed the church to silence and estrange us, to tempt us with the fruit of deceit. We looked on as our Queer brothers and sisters were bashed, ostracized, and murdered for their love-making and their justice-doing.
In the presence of our enemies-silence, fear, and violence-you called us out of our closeted shame and self-pity to be a people of hope and joy. You transformed the churning waters of oppression, alienation, and isolation into the life-giving waters of our baptism. Because of your grace and justice, we are no longer a people of the closet but a people of parades, rainbows, and quilts, called to lead your church in a march of liberation.
And so, with your people on earth and the company of heaven, we praise your name and join the unending hymn.
Sacred, wholly liberator, God
of our deliverance, blessed is the one who seeks justice, whose love knows no
bounds.
Loving and holy God, blessed is your child Jesus Christ in whom your call for grace-giving, love-making, and peace-doing was embodied.
In his journey to heal wounds of estrangement and silence, to cast out demons of fear and hatred, Your Spirit anointed him to act up against all forms of oppression, bigotry, and enslavement.
On the night on which he acted up, he took bread, gave thanks to you, broke the bread, gave it to his disciples and said, “Take, eat, this is my body which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of me and all who act up in my name.”
When the supper was over, he took the cup, gave thanks to you, gave it to his disciples and said, “Drink from this all of you, this is my blood for the new covenant, poured out for the hope of new life. Do this as often as you drink it in remembrance of me and all who act up in my name.”
And so in remembrance of these offerings for justice in Jesus Christ, we offer ourselves as a chosen people to bring the fullness of Your Reign on earth as we proclaim the mystery of faith.
Christ has died. Christ is risen. Christ will come again.
Pour out your liberating Spirit on us gathered here and on these gifts of wheat and wine. Make them be for us nourishment for the way of Christ, so that we may be for the world a beacon to your unconditional love.
Through Christ, with Christ, and in Christ,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
all glory is yours, God most holy,
now and forever.
Amen.
A Celebration of Coming out
[This celebration provides the opportunity for a lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender church member to ask for and receive support from his or her congregation. This may be done as a part of Sunday morning worship service or as a special private ceremony.]
INTRODUCTION
[A few brief words should be said about the importance and joy of this celebration. The one coming out will stand with the presider next to the baptismal fount. The presider will begin as follows:]
The Liberator set you free.
The freedom of Christ be yours also.
In keeping with our baptismal covenant to surround this child of God with love, prayer, support, and nurture, will you now stand in solidarity at this crucial step in (her/his) journey?
[The congregation will now stand as they are able, then respond.]
We are with you.
SCRIPTURE OF OTHER SPECIAL
[Selected readings or scripture passages may be read at this time. Suggested verses: Genesis 1:26-27, Psalm 139: 1-16, Isaiah 56:4-5, Matthew 5:13-16, John 16:33, Romans 8:35-39, or Galatians 3:27-28.]
DECLERATION OF COMING OUT
[The one coming out steps forward and declares:]
I praise God for I am fearfully
and wonderfully made. Wonderful are the
works of God-that I know very well. Therefore, I am proud to say, “I am a (lesbian/gay/bisexual/transgender)
child of God.”
WITNESS
[The congregation is seated. The one coming out may give a brief witness of the faith journey that has brought her/him to this point and/or others may witness to the person’s coming out.]
CONGREGATIONAL RESPONSE
[The presider begins.]
(Name), we are humbled by your courage, which testifies to your faith in the Liberating Christ.
[The congregation responds.]
(Name), you are
wonderfully and fearfully made, and we give thanks to God for your faithful
presence in our midst. May we be worthy
companions on your journey.
PRAYER WITH LAYING ON OF HANDS
[Friends and loved ones encircle the one coming out and lay hands on the one’s head as the presider begins:]
Let us pray for (name).
Prayers of the people will be offered.
BLESSING
[The presider continues:]
(Name), you are a child of God, a disciple of the Liberating Christ. May God bless you as you continue to leave the shadows of the closet and walk in the light of the truth and freedom. Amen.
HYMN(S) OF CELEBRATION
[Suggestions: “Child of Blessing, Child of Promise,” “I
Want to Walk as a Child of the Light,” or “
A
Ritual of Self- Renewal
[This ritual is for anyone who seeks to replenish one’s spiritual storehouse. The struggle for Queer justice is an ongoing journey. We recognize that coming out, acting up, or facing homophobia (internally or externally) or any other milestone along the liberating pathway depletes out spiritual resources. We offer this ritual as a reminder and a means to nurture and re-energize oneself.]
PREPARING
Choose a quiet place that is sacred for you. Bring with you a bowl of water, a candle with matches, meditative readings, and your journal. You may want to add more elements to your sacred space such as music, seashells, photographs, pride symbols or religious icons. Arrange your sacred space so that you are comfortable and that you are fed by the environment.
Relax, breathe deeply, and prepare to enter this time of renewal.
NAMING
Write down those events, persons, or revelations that occupy your mind and emotions. This journey entry may be a list, a short reflection, or a detailed account. Write until you have named all that has exhausted or challenged you.
Out loud, name key names, words, and phrases in an effort to make yourself hear the issues before you. For example, this may be the first time that you admit that you are attracted to persons of the same gender, that you are fearful of gay or lesbian people, or that you are burned out from constantly advocating for gay and lesbian rights.
CLEANSING
Now you are ready to light your candle. As you strike the match and ignite the flame, speak or meditate upon this prayer:
Liberating Spirit, transform
the burning rage, the parched loneliness, and the searing pain of my struggle
into a purifying flame that brings light, warmth, and wisdom to the shadows of
this moment. Create in me a strong
spirit.
FILLING
Begin your meditative readings, aware of the nourishment that they offer. Read until your needs are met. Meditating and journal writing may be helpful here.
BLESSING
Place your bowl of water in front of you; feel the sensation of the water as you dip your hands into the bowl and prepare to follow this blessing ritual.
Touch your fingers to your forehead and say:
Bless my thinking with wisdom
Touch your eyes and say:
Bless my seeing with clarity
Touch your ears and say:
Bless my hearing with
discernment
Touch your mouth and say:
Bless my speaking with truth
Touch your heart and say:
Bless my loving with honesty
Touch your palms and say:
Bless my caressing with
compassion
Touch your center and say:
Bless my being with
faithfulness
Touch your legs and say:
Bless my marching with
purpose
Touch your feet and say:
Bless my standing with
courage
CLOSING
Extinguish the flame of the candle, and as the smoke rises, lifting your prayers to God, say:
I now go forth in strength and peace. Amen.
*All hymns referred to in this appendix can be found in the United Methodist Hymnal, Nashville: The United Methodist Publishing House, 1989.