![](images/tim.jpg)
Ok, so now you're wondering "What the hell is up with this guy? Well, this
guy is Tim. This picture was taken at Busch Gardens about 5 years ago. Three of
us spent 3 days out in Tampa bay, at a Howard Johnson, and visited Busch Gardens
each day, all day. This was the first day. We were pretty giddy from the lack of
sleep and intoxicated with freedom from our parents. This man is the funniest
person I have ever met. You'll see some of his hijinks on the comics page. We
had a lot of fun, and soon you'll be privy all our stories. The scariest thing
of all is that this man is now a United States Marine. That's right, he is
the front line.
All right, on to the stories.
On My Walk Today
This is a story I wrote at 4AM one day and posted on a web board. It's short, is in plain text format, and really has no plot, rhyme, or reason.
Basically, I was very bored and very hyped on Mountain Dew. It's a standard text file.
On My Walk Today part 2
This is my second bored walking story. It's also in plain text format. I have one more, then I quit staying up on the message boards all night and got some sleep.
This is a plain text file.
On My Walk Today part 3
This is my third and final walking story. It's really just a romp through everything I remember of my favorite 80's movies. It took a while to write, because I had to
Google some of the plotlines I had forgotten.
Supersheep
This is a story I wrote for a Creative Writing class. I like the dialogue. It came form many nights spent at Denny's until five AM. This is also in Microsoft word format. You can get the plain text version here.
Horse's Ass
This is a widely-circulated e-mail about how the width of a horse's ass was a determining factor in the design and building of the Space Shuttles. This has been debunked by Cecil Adams here. It's still funny, though. This is a plain text document.
Growing up a Navy Brat
Most people who grow up outside the military have no idea what it's like to be a military brat. There really is no tighter-woven community than a military one, nor one so easily dissolved. In this essay
for my English102 class a few years back, I chronicle one aspect of my youth spent as a Navy brat: my reading habits. The plain text version can be found here.
Philosophy101
This is an essay I had to write for my Philosophy101 class. It's pretty well thought out and put together. Give it a read, then impress your friends with your ability to dissect an argument held thousands of years ago. This is a
Microsoft Word document. The plain text version can be found here.
Plato's Philosophy
Actually, it is just a breakdown of one of Plato's arguments, also from my Philosophy class. Impress your friends even more by throwing around Plato's name. The plain text version can be found here.
Some Questions
This is just a hastily typed amalgamation of some question's what've been brewing in my mind. I got the answers to some of these in my Physics classes, but others are still unanswered. Maybe you know, and you could mail me an answer or two
here.
Two Roads Diverged
This is an essay I wrote about the classic poem "The Road Not Taken" by Robert Frost. I did this one in an English 102 class, so it's probably not up to the standards I obviously hold myself to today. It's a good read, all the same. The plain text version can be found here.
Western Civ Final Paper
This is my final paper for my Western Civ I class. I was rather proud of this one; there was absolutely no
plagiarism in it at all. Purely original work. It's a long read, but maybe you can take some ideas from it for your own Western Civ class (if you're in one). The plain text version can be found here.
The Meaning of Liff
This is a copy of The Meaning of Liff by Douglas Adams and Terry Gilliam (I think). I downloaded this off KaZaa, and am not trying to pass it off as my own. It is in Microsoft Word's .doc format because it is a rather long document. I do not have a text version available as yet.
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