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A guy is walking past a big wooden fence at the insane asylum and he hears all the residents inside chanting, "Thirteen! Thirteen! Thirteen!
Quite curious about this, he finds a hole in the fence, and looks in. Someone inside pokes him in the eye. Then everyone inside the asylum starts chanting, "Fourteen! Fourteen! Fourteen!
An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink. As the bartender set it down, he asked, "Going to a party ?"
"Yeah," the man answered, "I'm supposed to come dressed as my love life."
"But you look like Abe Lincoln." protested the barkeep.
"That's right. My last four scores were seven years ago."
So the other day, my friends and I went to this "Ladies Night Club".
One of the girls wanted to impress us, so she pulls out a $10 bill. The "dancer" came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 and put it on his butt.
Not to be outdone, my other friend pulls out a $50 bill. She calls the guy back over, licks the $50. bill. and puts it on his other butt cheek.
Now the attention is focused on me. What could I do to top that? I got out my wallet, thought for a minute, then the banker in me took over.
I got my ATM card, swiped it down his crack, grabbed the 60 bucks, and went home.
Teman Johnson's Friendly Listening Post!
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