As of this part of the story, Maria/Lordessa is receiving co-writing credits on this.  In all fairness, she should have gotten them for "Until It Sleeps" too, but I was being greedy on that one :)  Anyways, next time you laugh at a joke or gasp at a plot twist, know that she probably had a very large hand in creating it.

Title: Getting It
Disclaimer: I don’t own them, Vince does. This never happened.  Reference is made to the song "Yellow" by Coldplay.  I don’t own it, and if I did, I'd disown it :)   Also mentioned is "Jack and Diane" by John Cougar Mellencamp.

Bradshaw and Kane drove in silence for an hour.  The dead quiet was occasionally broken by the sounds of car horns, angry cussing by other freeways drivers, and the ever-persistent radio, that kept insisting that "it was all....yellow."

And so, they kept driving and driving, past exit ramps, past signs advertising for strip clubs, past anything and everything, until Kane muttered "Exit 32."

"Huh?  What's with your shoe?"  Bradshaw asked, still half-asleep.

Kane shook his head.  "No, ya dumbass.  Exit 32.  Look for it."

So Bradshaw looked for exit 32, and he tried, really, he did.  And he found a sign that said Exit 32.  And he yelled, "Hey!  Exit 32..."  So Kane turned into the exit ramp, just as Bradshaw was reading the rest of the sign.  "... is closed."

Kane slammed on the brake just as he was about to crash into the series of orange cones.  "Dammit Bradshaw!  You could told me that before I turned!"

Bradshaw held up his hands in protest.  "I tried to!  You were going too fast!"

Kane rolled his eyes.  "This is the freeway!  Of COURSE I was going fast."  He sighed.  "Great, now what?  I can’t turn around...."

Bradshaw blinked, "Well, if you're done yelling," he paused to glare at Kane, "you could back out..."  Kane glanced over to him, then shrugged.  He put the car in reverse and began to attempt to back off of the ramp.  It worked all of ten seconds before the car started to stray onto the grass.  Kane cursed and tried to turn the other way.  No such luck, now the car was on the other side of the grass.  "Do you think this is why they make you drive in backwards figure 8's in driver's ed?"  Bradshaw asked innocently.

"Will you shut the hell up???"  Kane yelled.  Finally, after mastering the skill of driving backwards, Kane managed to get off the ramp and back onto the freeway.

And then, once more, there was silence.  There were less car noises, less cussing, and the radio, after Bradshaw had changed the station, was singing a little ditty about Jack and Diane.  Time went by, until Bradshaw finally said "The little orange thingy is on E."

 Kane glanced at him.  "What the hell are you talking about?"

Bradshaw tapped the gas gage.  "The little orange thingy in here.  It’s pointing at the E."

Kane glanced down.  "Shit!  I'm out of gas!  Bradshaw, we need to find a rest stop."  He paused.  "One off an exit that isn’t closed this time."

Bradshaw muttered a few colorful phrases as he watched for a sign.  Kane finally spotted one and they pulled into the gas station.

Once Kane had put gas in the car, he sat back down on the seat and rested his head on the steering wheel.  Bradshaw stared at him.  "Hey Kane," he said quietly, "you're real upset about Mark, aint'cha?"

Kane nodded silently.  "Doctors say if he stays out much longer, he might not wake back up."  Mark, better known as the Undertaker, had been in a coma for over two weeks after a motorcycle accident in the parking lot.

Bradshaw nodded in sympathy.  "I'm sure he'll get better.  He's got a real hard head..."  Bradshaw thought deeply for a moment.  He wanted to figure out a way to cheer Kane up.  Finally he thought of something.  "That's a mighty purdy mask you got on there," he drawled, running his finger down the edge of Kane's mask.

Kane blushed.  "You really think so?"

Bradshaw nodded. "Oh yeah.  And let me tell you what else...."

--Meanwhile--

"Ron?"

Farooq glanced over at the slender man sitting next to him.  "Yeah Jeff?"

"Can we stop at this next stop up here?"  Jeff Hardy asked, tucking one pink piece of hair behind his ear.

"Why?"  Ron paused.  "I told you if you drank all that Sprite before we left you’d have to pee."

"I don’t have to pee!"  Jeff protested. "I...uhmmmm...I..."

Ron chuckled.  "Ok fine, if you don’t have to pee, we'll keep going..."

Jeff let out an irate huff of air and watched the rest stop sign go by longingly.  Out of the corner of his eye, Ron could see the smaller man wiggling around.  At the nest rest stop sign, Jeff whispered, "Ron?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you stop here?  I really have to pee..."

Ron turned off onto the exit, laughing quietly to himself.   When they reached the rest stop, Jeff bolted out of the car and towards the bathroom, while Ron looked out the window.  "Hey, that looks like Kane's car over there.  I should go say hi."

He got out of his truck, glancing at the window of the car, which seemed to be filled with something very large and very pale.  He got closer, and the image became clear.  "BRADSHAW!  What or who the hell are you doing in there?"