I need to vent. So here I am, turning to this online journal to get everything out. Amazing how I feel like in here, I can express all my emotions freely, even though I have no idea who all may be reading this. *laugh* So here it goes...

Have you ever suddenly felt like you don't fit in anymore? Like, you had a place in the standings with your friends, and suddenly, it's gone? That's how I feel right now. I always had pride in being the rock, the walking support group, the person everyone could go to. Then things got crazy in my own life and I couldn't be that person, I had lost that ability somewhere. I tried my hardest, but it just wasn't the same. Here lately, I've been better, and things are doing pretty good...but now it seems as though I'm not needed to be that support, I'm not needed to be the cheerleader, the shoulder, whatever you want to call me. I know that sounds ridiculous, and it probably is when I look back at it. But that's just one of the feelings that's coursing through my body right now. And basically, I don't know what to do about it.

It's one of those reflective nights. I'm missing everyone right now, even people I just talked with a few minutes ago. I miss my Christianne, who's phone calls always find a way to bring a smile, even when I'm in tears. I miss Sara Beth, who's thisclose to graduation and probably has no idea just how proud I am of her and how much of a success I know she's going to be. I miss Laura Nicole, who I haven't really talked to at all today...I miss the giggles and ramblings and pictures and other silliness that seems to flow through somehow even when we're not all that stable. And I miss DJ, who just left me, and who I spent time with today...girl sure knows when I need to be lectured, and gives it to me straight out. *laugh* There are countless others that I miss as well...but these 4 make up the majority of my heart, they're my angels here on earth, and I just hope they know how much I love them.

Anyways...enough of my whining, ramblings, and sappiness for tonight, huh? *small smile* I'm sure y'all think I'm crazy by this point. But hey, what's considered normal these days? :) I certainly don't know.

Much love, and God Bless...

Angela