Voicemail

We all have learned to live with 'voice mail' as a necessary part of modern life. But have you wondered, 'What if God decided to install a voice mail?'. Imagine praying and hearing this:
"Thank you for calling the House of the Great Spirit. Please select from one of the following:"

* Press 1 for requests
* Press 2 for Giving Thanks
* Press 3 for Complaints
* Press 4 for all other Enquiries

What if God used the familiar excuse..."I'm sorry, all of our angels are busy helping other callers right now. However, your prayer is important to us and will be answered in the order it was received, so please stay on the line."

Can you imagine getting these kinds of responses as you call God in prayer:

If you would like to speak to:

* Gabriel, Press 1
* For Michael, Press 2
* For a directory of other Angels, Press 3
* If you would like to hear King David sing a      Psalm, or one of the heavenly choir singing
    a Spiritualist hymn while you are holding,
    Press 4
* To find out if a loved one has been assigned
    to Heaven, Press 5. Enter his or her Social
    Security/National Insurance number, then
    Press the Star Key. If you get a negative
    response, try area code 666
* For reservations at the House of the Great
    Spirit, please enter principles 5, 6 and 7.
* For answers to nagging questions about
    dinosaurs, the age of the Earth, where
    Noah's Ark is, or Atlantis, please wait until
    you arrive here.
* Our computers show that you have already
    prayed once today. Please hang up and try
   again tomorrow
* This office is closed for the weekend,
    Friday-Sunday inclusive, to observe
    religious holidays. (Sabbaths). Please pray
    again Monday after 9.30a.m.
* If you need emergency assistance when this
    office is closed, contact your local Spiritualist
    Church or Centre.

I am thankful that God doesn't have voicemail, and listens when we pray.