(Function of church) I dunno... be obsessive?
Okay, I can manage that... ;) . Hang on, we're not obsessed, we're focused! No, really. Honestly, ask anyone... :)
Build a Shrine
That is what this whole site is. A church, a chapel, a shrine to David Duchovny.
Most often suggested: Worship David Duchovny! Worship the ground he walks on!! Worship all things David. The obvious, duh, WORSHIP HIM! He has done a number of great things (we all know and love) that he should be apprecialted for in full glory.
Which isnt exactly what I had in mind when I started the church. More like:
Praise David! Proclaim the goodness of DD! Bow before his feet???
But that still isn't quite what I was thinking. What I meant was like these suggestions:
Love and admire(very much) the hunk we call David. Have deep appreciation of him. Let him live his life. Just love and appreciate David, for the wonderful man that he is!!
Because there is a difference between adoration and worship. I adore David, I love everything I know about him, but I do not quite worship him. If you want to bow down in front of him, feel free. Personally, I would rather talk to him.
Which, not surprisingly, is the other main suggested function of the church:
Try to get in touch with David. Also, give up-to-date reports on his whereabouts and travels, so that us worshippers may have the chance of viewing this babe - I mean, Saint, here on earth. Try and find a way to meet him in person. Visit David Duchovny together. Keep in touch w/ David in order to remind him that there are loadsa peeps who love him still! Or send him gifts declaring our love. It's probably a long shot (considering the finances it would take), but maybe a trip to Vancouver could be organised to see if we could actually "stumble upon" (heh-heh) a X-files shooting. Just a thought. 8-)
And there are the main problems with this idea right in the last comment.
It would take some fairly serious money for most of our members to get to Vancouver (unless there are any that actually live there). If I had that much money, I would pay the electricity, and the bank, and the barclaycard... But even if we could afford it, I would not go. not just turn up and start stalking David en masse. I mean, can you imagine if a hundred women (and one guy) turned up and started following you around at work? I wouldn't do that to him.
On the other hand, if there were some way to organise a meeting he would agree to, like talking to his agent or something, I would be all for it. If he wants to meet us, he knows we want to meet him.
As for talking to or keeping in touch with David, as you probably know by now I actually managed the former, but the latter I have no more chance of than any of you. They phoned me, I dont even know the number for the radio station, let alone Dave. I do not know his email address, and I would not use it if I did. I dont know his home address, and I would not snail mail anywhere but his fan mail address. the best I can manage by way of contacting him are these pages. He knows the name, if he wants to find us he can. I'm not holding my breath though.
I think it is possible to send gifts through the fanmail address, but I dont know if it would be a good idea. Rather depends on the gift. Also, what can we give him he cannot already get for himself? that is why I put up the offerings page. There we can tell him we love him, and offer our thoughts, which are the only truly unique gifts we can give.
A lot of you would like to meet other church members. Or have a reunion for all members . Well, for RL meetings, the same money and transport problems apply. We are a world wide church, getting us all on the same continent would be a major challenge, let alone in the same room.
On the other hand, we have a message board, a mailing list and a chat room. So:
Could form a discussion group and, well, discuss, spread the word of David, let all know his wit, wisdom, and sex-appeal. And seek for more adepts. Just keep in touch with one another. Be a community. Promote the admiration of David Duchovny... And provide a place for DD lovers to meet chat etc. Bring people together. What should it do? It should gush about David and discuss the X-files. It should keep updated on all the news about him, share pics of him, stories of encounters with him (for the more fortunate). ...talk about David stuff! Hold weekly "services" (ie. chat, or something like that). Promote david everywhere...and start a church webring
All this, we can manage, with the possible exception of the web ring. I cannot join the LODD webring even, let alone start one. I wouldn't know where to begin. I will happily do the work if someone would explain how though.
We can meet after the X files is on in the Church chat room. We can email each other with our opinions of all things DD. We can tell all our friends, everyone with a page, anyone on other lists, all about the Church and David. We can leave messages about just about anything we can think of over on the Church message board, and get to know each other.
The Church should be here for guidance when a Member goes astray and stops glorifying DD. Or when they stop watching X-Files.
Who amongst us would ever do such a thing? But we are all here for each other should such a crisis of faith occur. :)
One thing I cannot be much help with is David Duchovny related news. Many of you think the function of the Church should be:
Report updates on David. Give us lots of info on "Our Guy". Keep updates on DD and all his exploits. Anything with pictures and info on DD. PLEASE JUST PROVIDE US WITH TRUE FACTS ABOUT AN ACTOR THAT DESERVES RESPECT. NO TABLOID TRASH! I don't care, just get some more pics up, please! :) Have lots of pix of David. Include more X-Files Info. Updates on David, and spreading the gospel of his good word!!
The same thing is my problem in all these things. I get all my information about David over the net. Anything I hear is from other mailing lists or other peoples web sites, so I just link to the origional source. All my pictures are from one of three or four sites, listed in the Library. I do not buy magazines, even a tv listings magazine, and being in England I am rather more than a season behind with the X Files. So, any news or updates you want, I am not a good source for them. Follow the links in the Library. As for spreading the good word, go for it. Link to here from your pages, write about us in guestbooks, and tell all your friends.
Something more difficult:
Have david pray on national tv
Even more difficult:
FIND THE TRUTH!
And only one step from impossible:
Find other men like him