Some of these are serious, some are silly, all are from the Monster! Arranged in the order that Red came up with them!
Sleep with
the organizer. Eh...heh heh. No, I'm not giving away details on this
one!
Enter your
stories, then adopt 5 or 6 different email addresses and sign up to judge
5 or 6 times and give your stories the highest marks! If the Monster
catches you doing this, she will KILL you and play tetherball with your
head. Not kidding. Death to the first person who tries pulling a stunt
like that.
Write good
stories. Like, duh. You should be doing that even if you're not entering
the Proshes! It's not that hard, really. Open up an English textbook and
learn proper spelling and grammar. Be well-acquainted with the characters
before you write them. Practice writing. Read over your stories before
you post them to make sure they're okay. Come up with original ideas. Practice
writing. Pace your stories evenly and briskly, but not dizzyingly fast.
Respect canon continuity, unless you're writing an "alternate universe"
story where canon continuity is different. Did I mention you should practice
writing? Get a betareader or two to make sure you're doing all these things.
Okay, so it does take some anal-retentiveness. But it's not impossible.
We are also not implying that if your story is any good, it WILL win a
Prosh. There are a lot of excellent fics that aren't honored simply because
something else was slightly better. But you know you won't take
home a Prosh Head if you submit birdcage lining!
Find out
who the judges are and submit something you know they all like! I dare
ya to try...
Bribe the
moderator with chocolate-covered naked Shatterstar clones to mess with
the scores.
Hack into
the indexed archives and sabotage the other authors' stories to make them
really sucky. First, however, you have to hack into the Prosh site's
directory to find out which archives are indexed. The Monster doesn't know
about all those other archivists, but she will do violence unto any hacker
whom she catches hacking into the Prosh site.
Volunteer
to design and distribute the trophies, and make at least one with your
name on it. This is assuming that Red decides she wants someone else
to be in charge of the trophies.