Here's The Devil's Hate List:



1. Satanists

Good grief, these guys are pathetic. I'm flattered that they worship me, but they are some unoriginal bastards. The entire religion is the complete opposite of Christianity. The Satanic Bible has 10 commandments that are the exact opposite of the Bible's 10. Are you kidding? Is that the best you can do? Jesus gets parables and stories, and I don't get shit. All I wanted was some created legends, and something to make people say, "Hey, that Lucifer sure is something." But no. They are one of the many reasons I have a bad rep. Human sacrifices? The pentagram. BORING. There's no flare....It's just "scary". Big deal.

Am I going to welcome them to Hell with open arms? Nope. I'm gonna send those ignorant fucks down to the pit (the bottom of Hell smells the most like shit---And that's what they are).


2. Christians

That's a big shock, huh? Humans think I hate Christians because they love God. That's not true. I like God and Jesus, too....I always have. I dislike these people because they write me into the Bible as ultimate evil, and then make me out to be the doer of all things bad....even blaming their own mistakes on me....The irony is that some Christians are even worse than I am. Check out these Baptists:

You know what? God hates Hatemongers, too. Don't tell them that....I'll see them soon enough. Damn it. That's why Hell sucks. The judgmental assholes always end up here. The only enjoyment they bring with them is watching their expressions change when they realize where they are. HAH! Now THAT is funny!!



3. Marilyn Manson

I wanted to like the guy, I did. He started off so well....He pissed off religious groups....He looked hideous (look at him), I mean he was great. But then, he wanted to "evolve"....Now he's glam rock with a twist....PROSTHETIC BREASTS. I mean, come on! I may be evil, but that is SICK. You won't catch Lucifer with a pair of fake tits....



4. Puff Daddy

I HATE this guy....He's made so much money by doing absolutely nothing! You can only do that by selling your soul to me! He even enlists the help of Sting and Jimmy Page! After all I did for them! Puffy, you're going down, man. If you don't believe me, go see how well MC Hammer's doing. You're next, fucker.


5. Keith Richards

Keith has done very little to piss me off, except for one thing: he hasn't died yet! I like the Rolling Stones (there's a shock), but I expect the fucker to die every year, man. But NOOOOOO....He and Hunter Thompson do drugs out the ass, but neither one of them show any signs of stopping. What kind of example does that set? I don't want people living forever!

6. Rosie O'Donnell

Why do I hate Rosie? Because even the Devil knows she's a fat stupid bitch.

"Hi, I'm a fat stupid bitch!"


7. Mark Twain

He gave me the nickname "Ol' Scratch." What a jerk....I'm glad that hillbilly fuck is dead.

8. Dick Clark

I could hate Dick Clark for many reasons....he never ages, he's brought shitty music to the masses through American Bandstand for years....His restaurant chain is a bad version of "Hard Rock Cafe"-Light....But the main reason I hate him: Those blooper shows he and Ed McMahon used to do. Ugh. I've had more fun eating my own feces than watching that show.

9. Ed McMahon

See #8.

10. Bob Saget

No shock....EVERYONE hates Bob Saget....Even Bob Saget. 11. Britney Spears, Christina Aguillar, etc

I'm sick and tired of Mickey Mouse club spoiled little debutantes growing up to sing like their black. Somebody stick Britney's fake tits in her and Christina's mouth so they can't sing. PUHLEASE....

"I'm pretty! Buy my CD! Teehee! Somebody shoot me!"




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