WHO IS SLACK?

"eleven times I've been busted
eleven times I've been in jail;
some of the times I've been there,
nobody would pay my bail
well it seems to me that this ol' boy don't fit
could jump in a rosebush, end up smelling like sh--" -- lynyrd skynrd

Rather than CATALOGUE ALL OF the PEOPLE WHO ARE SLACK (which would take about 10 minutes that I don't have) it is better and more informative for you to read a typical slacker's schedule for a normal day of slack:

[Note: This is not a weekend day. This is during the week, while the rest of y'all are sitting at your desk getting beat down by the man!!!]

08:45 Wake up to hear phone ringing

08:50 Answer phone. It is boss at low-paying degrading job asking where you were yesterday and why you aren't working today.

08:52 Hang up on boss, unplugging phone as you roll over back to sleep.

09:30 Phone rings again (forgot to unplug the kitchen phone)

09:32 Answer phone. It is bill collector asking why last two months haven't been paid, threatening to cancel Visa account. Pretend you didnt' get bill for last two months. Visa company rep does not buy it. Pretend you are very sorry and want to send in the bill ASAP. Go back to sleep.
10:50 Wake up to hear NO phone ringing. The sound of silence is as deafening as a gunshot. Check phone. Dial the bank's automated account balance service to see if you have money to buy lunch. Phone is disconnected.

11:15 Shower and dress, wearing same shirt you have worn for the last four months (you do wash it every 2-3 days, you're not a slob or anything).

11:30 Walk (out of gas money) over to Chris's house (everyone knows someone named Chris who is slack) to see if he has any ramen noodles (no food at your house, fool).

12:15 Find Chris watching "planet of the apes" reruns on fuzzy granular TV set. Eat Chris's noodles while talking about how much grad school sucks.

13:40 Carpool with Chris to pawn shop to sell compact disks and miscellaneous audio equipment.

14:50 Earn $12 apiece from sale of over $300 worth of stuff. Go eat at chinese resturant.

17:30 Spend $3 apiece on Galaga at local thrift mart. Get to fourth challenging stage before getting blown up by stupid aliens.
19:00 With remaining $3, go to "Soap N Suds" beer/laundry emporium. Watch horrendously shitty talk shows on big screen TV while drinking $1 beer and doing your one load of laundry that you actually own. Breathe lots of smoke and talk to single 25 year old mothers of four.

20:00 Strike out with single 25 year old mother of four when she finds out that you don't poach deer or sell drugs for a living. Realize that you will never get any action in THIS TOWN.

22:35 Realize that you had to do homework for your low-paying degrading graduate school profession. Don't care.

22:59 Take long walk through campus of Stalag 13 (University of North Texas), stomping on cockroaches the size of subway sandwiches while deciding what to sell tomorrow.

23:00 Realize that you are totally broke and need to go back to work at low-paying degrading job or something the next day.

23:15 Scream "THIS FUCKING TOWN!" at the top of your lungs as you pass out and go to sleep.