Something I've come to know intimately and on many levels in the past two years. It has left me relocated, torn from my family and financially independent to a certain extent. But it has also left me happy. For the first time in my life I am being encouraged to sit down and think about things, real, unreal, beautiful and frightening things, and slowly I am rediscovering who I am. Not many people like this about me, but that's their problem entirely. The bottom line for me is that I'm happy, mentally and spiritually free to pursue my own salvation, and let's face it, where else does my salvation lie but within?

This is a slow process and I am well aware that a long journey lies ahead of me but in realizing where my salvation lies, I have prepared myself for that journey and judging by how I am feeling during the first few steps, it is going to be an awesome experience. Spiritual freedom is something I've never experienced because I've always been preached to that my way is not the way and that there is a better way and I'd better follow it or face an eternity of roasting in the sulfurous landscapes of Hell. Well I've thought long and hard about that over the past twenty years and the word "bullshit" kinda describes my opinion on that very well. What people don't do is consider what they are being told and weigh it up against what they know to be true, based on how they feel and what common sense tells them is way too idealistic to be of any use to anyone. But that's people for you. They like to be lead but still think they're in control.

After a lifetime of being preached to about certain things, one always reaches a crossroads : shall I do as they want or shall I go my own way and make my own rules, live my own life, not concentrate on what the people around me are doing, and do what makes me happy, think the way I want to think? I know the road I've chosen and I don't regret it for a second. The agreement I will get from most of you out there will be non-existent but who really gives a shit? Is it your life?

No.

So I'll get on with my life over here, I will discover exactly who I am and where I'm headed, and frankly I am really looking forward to it. There's been enough screwing around - it's now time for things to happen. And they will, believe me.