THE NEW SOUTH AFRICA 2
THE NEW SOUTH AFRICA 2
CHOOSING HIS CHINA
On
July 2nd, 1996, pres Mandela told a group of French journalists in Johannesburg
when asked about South Africa's diplomatic relations with the Republic
of China (Taiwan), who supported the ANC with a R40 million donation in
1994 before the General Elections:
"It is not easy for
me to be helped by a country, and when I come to power, to say to them:
'I do not want to have diplomatic relations with you'. I do not have that
kind of immorality and I will not do it".
On August 26th, 1996
pres Mandela reconfirmed his position by saying that it would not be correct
of the ANC, now that it is in power, to sever ties with Taiwan. "It
will be a man without morality to do such a thing. I will not make myself
guilty of such a deed".
On November 25th, 1996,
pres Mandela announced that South Africa was to sever diplomatic ties with
the Republic of China at the end of 1997, in favour of the People's Republic
of China (Red China).
The Minister of Labour, Tito Mboweni, arrived late to give the opening address at an international productivity conference in Johannesburg.
The Government Tender
Bulletin of Dec 6th, 1996, asks for applications for the following professional
service:
"Appointment of a
consultant(s) for the provisioning of management consultants specialising
in affirmative action required by the Department of Public Works".
"The
premier does not read letters in which her name is spelled incorrectly.
She will therefore appreciate it if you will fax your letter again with
the correct spelling of her name", was the wording of a fax Mr &
Mrs Gerrit Nolte of the Strand received, one month after faxing a letter
to the office of dr Ivy Matsepe-Casaburri, premier of the Free State.
The Noltes addressed
their fax to Ms Cassi Burri.
Traffic police will try anything to meet income targets for traffic fines. A Harrismith resident is due for trial in the town for failing to wear a seatbelt. He's unlikely to pay the R200 admission of guilt fine. According to local newspapers, the traffic ticket reveals he was riding a bicycle.
In February 1997 ANC's
Mr IC Meer tabled a motion in the KwaZulu-Natal legislature, which he maintained
"transcends party affiliation and even gender solidarity".
The motion begins by
noting "with deep concern" that in the closing years of this "man
dominated" 20th century the machine is "taking over from man"
(sic). It also notes "the computer is in the lead to dominate both men
and women now in the pending 21st century of the future and recording the
serious computer erros committed by the machine in both the recent matric
examination and in paying salaries to non-existing provinical employees
and possible existing recipients of salaries a young as two year olds..."
The motion goes on to propose that "this House appoints a legal committee
to draw (up) legislation to nip the machine threats to man and woman in
the butt..."
The Easter Cape Department of Housing and Local Government issued Circular No 4 to clear up the confusion about councillor allowances:
"(The meeting) observed that the Dept of Housing has unintentionally created a lot of confusion by issuing Circular No 2 which lifted Circular No 1. There was also Circular No 3 which dealt with TRC allowances. The meeting noted that though Circular No 2 was intended to deal with the situation that was created as a result of the misinterpretation of Circular No 1, Circular No 2 has even confused those authorities/councils that have interpreted Circular No 1 correctly. The total withdrawal of Circular No 1 by Circular No 2 was strongly rejected by the ECLGA. The associatiod argued strongly that not all councils have misinterpreted the contents of Circular No 1. It was then resolved that both Circulars No 2 and Circular No 3 should be withdrawn and Circular No 1 be re-implemented".
LOCAL LOCH NESS MONSTER
The
good citizens of Mount Ayliff in Transkei are being terrorised by their
own version of Nessie - a beast which, according to Eastern Cape Agriculture
MEC Ezra Sigwela, is "half fish and half horse", a so-called mamlambo.
Sigwela told the Eastern
Cape Legislature that the creature, which lives 200 km upriver in the Mzimhlavariver,
has already caught and eaten seven people.
The MEC said he learnt
of the beast when he visited the town on Freedom Day 1997 when, instead
of political questions, he had been asked what the government was going
to do about this Eastern Cape distant relative of the Loch Ness Monster.
MPL's seemed particularly
interested in knowing which half of the beast was horse or fish.
The province's department
of environmental affairs and tourism agreed to send an investigation team
to Mt Ayliff to search for the mamlambo, and was ordered to report
back within two weeks (that is if they are not caught and eaten themselves).
Winnie
Madikizela-Mandela, self-proclaimed "mother of the nation" and hailed as
"Queen of All of Africa", obviously has higher standards than the
ordinary folk she claims to represent.
After telling the ANC
Women's League that she was "one of the few who are proud to be poor",
she announced to Parliament in May 1997 that she had no assets to declare
which would influence her behaviour as an MP.
Madikizela-Mandela takes
home a paltry R11 312,06 a month as an MP, owns three houses and a tourist
business called Heroes Acre, which sells soil from the yard of the home
she shared with President Nelson Mandela, together with a certificate of
authenticity, to anyone with R50 to spare.
So poverty stricken was
she that Mandela's lawyers gave the courts documents in 1996 during her
divorce proceedings to the effect that she was requiring only R107 399
a month to survive.
Embattled ANC MP Winnie
Madikizela-Mandela, who is the subject of civil lawsuits and criminal prosecution
in the country's courts, now faces an internal hearing from Parliament's
ethics committee. Parliament's registrar of members' interests, Fazela
Mahomed, has recommended in February 2002 that Madikizela-Mandela appear
before the committee after she failed to respond in writing to several
questions about her business interests and donations allegedly received.
She had been given until
November 26, 2001, to reply.
Mahomed's recommendation
that a hearing be held to determine the facts was made to committee members
in a memorandum dated February 6, 2002.
Madikizela-Mandela stands
accused of not disclosing all of her business and financial interests,
as required, in Parliament's register of members' interests.
It has been alleged that
Madikizela-Mandela failed to declare her interest in a Soweto business,
and also failed to disclose donations of R55000 a month to support her
lifestyle.
The complaint relates
to her spaza shop, restaurant and the Winnie Mandela Family Museum, at
the Orlando West house, from which she has since been evicted after a court
order was granted against her in January.
Madikizela-Mandela's
lawyers are contesting the eviction.
Other civil action against
Madikizela-Mandela relates to her luxury vehicle.
A court order allowing
First Rand Bank to repossess a Mercedes Benz S320 after she defaulted on
credit instalments was granted in the Johannesburg High Court on Tuesday
February 5th, 2002.
Madikizela-Mandela, who
is out on bail of R5000, is expected to appear in court in July 2002 on
charges of fraud amounting to R930 000, and 25 charges of theft involving
about R10000.
Her aide, Alan Reynolds,
was not immediately available for comment.
The ethics committee
has yet to decide whether to accept Mahomed's recommendation.
At a post Truth and Reconciliaton Committee press conference in 1997, deputy president Thabo Mbeki, describing one particularly gross human rights violation, told journalists - all of whom recorded his comments without batting an eyelid - that this had been "a crime against apartheid".
Ms Yoliswa Pokela, secretary of the Ekhaya Lothando Communicty Centre, added three noughts to a claim for R329 920 from the Development Bank for a community building project, thus making it R329 million. The faulty claim was stopped by the Gauteng government and a cheque for R329 million was not issued. She explained that the fault has to be blamed on the education system of the apartheid era, since she was "not allowed to study mathematics at school".
Dullah
Omar, then Minister of Justice, in an interview with the newspaper
Rapport after being asked if it was not inappropriate that he, as Minister
of Justice, met dr Alan Boesak at the Cape Town airport after returning
from the US to stand trial:
"No, I was not criticised
by the ANC for doing so. And I do not differentiate between the ANC and
the government. They are the same".
After embracing Boesak
at the airport, Omar (who was later demoted to the portfolio of Transport)
stated:
"Neither the President,
the Deputy President, the Cabinet, nor the minister of justice were asked
for their views with regard to the possible prosecution, and when the attorney-general,
after his own investigation, decided to prosecute, again we had no say
in the matter".
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| When he arrived at the Bellville Police Station on May 16th, 2000 to start his jail sentence, Boesak was met by a crowd of enthusiastic supporters to see him off, including Ebrahim Rasool (right) leader of the ANC in the Western Cape. |
Elna Boesak, beloved wife
of dr Alan Boesak, who wore black whilst her husband was in jail for fraud
and theft, was charged to appear before the Labour Court in Cape Town in
September 2002. Christina Mpupumiso, a former domestic worker of Elna Boesak,
demanded R1 300 after she was illegally dismissed from service in Junie
2001 - soon after Alan Boesak was discharged from jaul - after working
for Elna Boesak for six months.
According to documents
before the court Mpupumiso earned R800 per month as full time domestic
worker for Elna Boesak in their house in the Strand. She was summarily
dismissed after Elna Boesak claimed that she charged her cellular phone
on the Boesak's electrical power, and washed her clothes together with
that of the Boesak family.
FAAWU (the Food and Allied
Workers' Union) of the Western Cape advertised for a branch organiser in
1997. Applicants must be "prepared to work 24 hours" a day.
Wonder what the branch
manager's union is going to say about it.
DOING IT ACCORDING TO THE RULEBOOK
When armed robbers held up and robbed the branch of Volkskas Bank in the SABC buildings in Auckland Park, they placed the money in a bag which, on the way out, they throughtfully put through the x-ray security scanner.
EXAMINATION MISTAKE
A police reservist, in
writing an interim written examination, was asked to define "arson".
He replied: "When
one man makes love to another man".
It is not known whether
he passed the exam.
WRONG COUNTRY, WRONG KING
To celebrate Switzerland's national day on August 1st, 1997, Isaac Mogase, mayor of the Greater Johannesburg Transitional Metropolitan Council was invited as guest of honour at the Swiss consul-general's Hyde Park residence. Offering his congratulations of the Swiss confederation, Mogase proposed a toast to "King Olaf of Switzerland". Noting the surprised look on guests' faces, it was quietly pointed out to Mogase that Switzerland was neither a kingdom nor that Olaf, king of Sweden, rules over Switzerland.
FAX IT ALL
A businessman phoned government offices of the Eastern Province in Bisho, inquiring after some important documents. The clerk said the papers were on her desk, ready for posting, but agreed to fax them instead. A few minutes later a fax arrived in the businessman's office, showing the outside of an envelope addressed to him. When he phoned back to ask about the documents, the clerk replied: "They're in the envelope, why don't you open it?"
COLD COMFORT
A senior civil servant
in the Department of Environmental Affairs testified before a committee
investigating allegations of racism made by ANC MP Joyce Madhubafasi. He
was asked why South Africa's SANAE base in the Antarctic did not have any
black employees.
He replied that recruits
were exprected to spend long periods at the base and it was impossible
to hire blacks "because they always have to go home to attend funerals".
PROOF OF THE PUDDING
When Batu Holomisa announced
during December 1996 that het intended starting a new policital party,
Roelf Meyer - then secretary general of the National Party - said: "Mr
Holomisa never was a politician. It will be amazing if he is capable of
starting a political party".
Nine months later Roelf
Meyer and Bantu Holomisa together established the United Democratic Movement
as political party, with both as co-leaders. As from 1994, Meyer served
as deputy-leader under Holomisa. He has since left politics.
LET SLEEPING SPOOKS LIE?
On July 12th, 1997 it was announced that 11 minibuses were stolen from the National Intelligence Agency headquarters in Pretoria. Four months later it was announced that burglars had stolen computers valued at R1,77-million from the same premises; the spokesperson, Ms Nosiviwe Mapisa-Nqakula, chairperson of the intelligence portfolio committee of the National Assembly, added: "To date neither the kombi's nor the perpetrators have been traced or found".
NOT IMPRESSED
Deputy President Thabo Mbeki attended a meeting in Stockhold of an organisation dedidated to the rebirth of the contintent, known as Partnership Africa. Not only dit his aides demanded that he be accommodated in the grandest hotel in town, the Grand Hotel, but that he be given a spacious suite. This was followed up by insisting that be driven to the conference centre in his own chauffeur-driven limousine, in stead of using the bus as the other delegates did. This did not impress the Swedish foreign minister, Lena Hjelm-Wallen, who insists on going to work on bicycle.
GENITAL SUPPORT
The national executive of the African National Congrees Youth League met during 1997 to diliberate on the leadership issue. A statement released later said that the Youth League would continue broad consultations with the ANC leadership and the women's league on the topic. The statement added: "Our lower organs are also involved in this process".
WAITING FOR MR NINO'S VISIT
The Deputy Minister of
Tourism and Environmental Affairs, Peter Mokaba, attended the opening of
a new dam near Nelspruit, Mapumalanga. Politicians and VIP's were shown
around by a local guide who was somewhat intimidated by the eminent visitors.
One of the politicians
said that the dam was a good thing because it provided for times of drought,
for when El Nino comes, etc.
Upon which the guide
replied:
"Well, I will be glad
to show Mr El Nino around as well when he comes".
CIVILIAN DUTY
The Greater Johannesburg
Transitional Metropolitan Council chamber displayed the following notice
on several boards in 1998:
"Please bring your
own toilet rolls for use at work. If you're feeling generous, extra rolls
for use in the public toilets will be appreciated".
MUTUAL CO-OPERATION
The senior executive from
a multinational company has given a new definition to a joint venture.
The foreign partner,
he says, provides the capital, technology and expertise. The South African
partner provides the risk.
HIGH TECH CONFUSION
Former Gauteng Premier
Tokyo Sexwale was given an honorary degree in technology by Nottingham
Trent University early in 1998.
Speaking at the award
ceremony in Johannesburg, Sexwale said he could only recollect that he
had once briefly studied "army engineering" in the Soviet Union, which
had more to do with destruction than construction.
The only other possible
reason he could think of had to do with when President Nelson Mandela was
moved to Victor Verster Prison after negotiations with Mr FW de Klerk.
"When I discovered
that Mandela had been given two TV sets at Victor Verster Prison, I concluded
that he had sold out. Why two TV's?"
Mandela told him that
the other one was an instrument for boiling water. Sexwale solved the problem:
it was not a TV, but a microwave oven.
INCOME TAX EXEMPTION
Western Cape Regional Court president Anson Victor Boyisi Lugaju, who was appointed as magistrate for the hearing of former State President PW Botha's refusal to testify before the Truth and Reconciliation Commission in 1998, was found not to have been registered with the Receiver of Revenue for income tax purposes ever. His income tax return for 1996/97 had not been submitted. On inquiry by a newspaper, Lugaju said that he had been living in Cape Town for only six months and was unaware that he had to register. He added that, as a magistrate in Transkei, it was "not required of me to ever complete an income tax form".
ANONYMOUS SPONSORSHIP
"The
Anti-smoking Bill is the most comprehensive effort in history to ban each
and every form of communication on tobacco products.
"Tobacco companies
will not be prevented by the legislation to continue sponsoring sports
events; they are only prevented from coupling their name or logo to the
event".
Min Nkosazana Zuma, during
the debate in Parliament on her new Smoking Policy Bill, July 1998.
PROMOTING EMIGRATION
The printing of an extensive supplement in honour of President Nelson Mandela's 80th birthday by the Cape Argus, was halted in mid-run. The reason? An order "from above" to remove an advertisement promoting emigration to New Zealand because of the violence in South Africa.
RAPID REACTION UNIT
When a school official
in Gauteng expelled the daughter for theft, Safety and Security Minister
Sydney Mufamadi moved like lightning. He immediately called Education Minister
Sibusiso Bengu, who called Gauteng education MEC Mary Metcalfe, who immediately
called education director-general James Maseko, who immediately called
the school officials to order.
The result? An immediate
apology to Mufamadi's daughter for the anguish caused by making her apologise
for theft in front of the school and an immediate green light for her to
write her matric exams.
WATER SHORTAGE
The Constitutional court is no longer able to supply glasses to the judges, advocates and journalists because they are being stolen at the rate of about twelve per constitutional case hearing.
STRANGE BEDFELLOWS
Indonesian president Suharto,
on his arrival in South Africa in November 1998, was greeted at the airport
by Deputy President Thabo Mbeki, 14 cabinet ministers, a guard of honour
and a 21-gun salute. The great man was awarded the Order of the Cape of
Good Hope, Gold Class - the highest South African honour available
to foreigners - by President Nelson Mandela.
Six months later, Suharto
was deposed as president of Indonesia and forced to resign. A public statement
by the South African government noted that Suharto's resignation was "courageous".
NO ROBBERY, WE'RE BLACK
Burglars
greeted their victim at the front door of his house in Kroonstad, Free
State, and apologised for breaking into his house. According to them, they
did not realise that he was black.
Sgt.
Stephen Thakeng of the SAPD said that the owner of the house, who wishes
to remain anonymous, and his wife was awakened by a noise at 02:00. Three
armed burglars obtained entry into the house by forcing the burglar bars
of a window. The burglars asked the man whether he was the owner of the
house. When he replied "yes", they apologised and said they were under
the impression that the house was owned by whites. They only burglarise
white people's houses, they assured him.
The
burglars took the man's cellphone, cut his telephone line, and greeted
him by hand at the front door before disappearing into the night.
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