15 July, 1999
I have returned from my travel to Skopje, Macedonia. As you know I went there to help the refugees from Kosovo who were driven from their homes by the Serbian military. I left Baltimore on June 22 and returned on July 8. My trip ended up being a little shorter than I had planned. But then so many things were different than I expected. That is why I am writing, to tell you a little bit about my trip and to let you know how your generous donations helped make a difference in this world. Since my return, it has been difficult to express myself about my trip and what I saw, but I feel I owe all of you an accounting.
For some of you, the last you heard from me was my original letter of solicitation, where I expected to be travelling to Greece to purchase food, doing construction on homes overloaded with refugees being privately housed, and working at the Albanian TV station in Skopje. As the time for my departure drew nearer, a cease-fire agreement was reached for Kosovo and hopes for peace were raised. At that point I envisioned being able to go into Kosovo and work to rebuild homes during my stay. All of my original thoughts were somewhat idealistic and naïve. After I arrived in Skopje, God led me to serve in a humble and meaningful way that met the most basic of human needs, for food and clothes.
On my very first afternoon I visited one of the refugee camps on the outskirts of Skopje. The living conditions were terrible --- rows of tents for as far as I could see, on ground devoid of grass; no showers; bathroom latrines that looked like the voting booths with buckets in them; they would be emptied onto the ground. But there as elsewhere, I was struck much more by the looks on the faces of the people. The vacant stares, the utter desolation at the loss of loved ones, the incomprehensibility of losing home and all possessions ------the wounded souls were etched indelibly in my mind.
Beginning the very next day I worked, either at TV-ERA, the tiny Albanian TV station, or at the Mother Tereza Organization (MTO). The TV station was about the size of one in our local high school. They had 3 cameras and a couple of VCRs, both of which I helped repair while there. TV-ERA is the only Albanian-speaking broadcast facility in the area. It is rudimentary, but serves an important purpose.
The MTO is an independent charitable organization run strictly by volunteers and supported 100% by donations. Prior to the war it served the local poor, but once refugees began streaming into Macedonia, the MTO became a tenuous lifeline for thousands of ethnic Albanians who had fled their country, providing them food and clothing. The MTO is open to receive refugees 3, sometimes 4 days per week. On the other days, supplies are being procured and set up for the next open day. MTO has two warehouses in Skopje, both on loan free of charge. One is the distribution center and the other is primarily for storage. We would move things from the storage center to the distribution center as needed. Clothes were stored in 100-pound bales. Trucks would be sent to Bulgaria to buy food for distribution, because food was cheaper there. This would be again volunteers who paid their own travel expenses, usually displaced Kosovars who had been lucky enough to make it out of the country without losing their vehicles. The food items that were distributed were pasta, rice, flour, salt and sugar, and occasionally beans. There were 6-8 people who worked in the warehouses regularly, besides myself. We served 400-600 people each day we were open. While I was there the MTO finished setting up similar centers in Pristina and Prisma, both in Kosovo.
Despite the language barrier, I was able to pick up a lot of information from the people who came in. It seemed that every family I saw had lost at least one family member. Unfortunately, all too often I spoke with young mothers whose husbands had been murdered, or middle-aged couples whose sons had been murdered. Many had actually witnessed these killings. As families fled Kosovo, the Serbs would confiscate or destroy their farm animals and vehicles. Then they would demand money. If the family had any to turn over, chances are they would be allowed to continue. If they did not have money, often the man or men would be separated from the others and shot. This is the reality that I experienced.
While living and working there I also had a chance to experience life in the Republic of Macedonia. The lasting effects of Communism were still very much in evidence. There are high rise buildings half-constructed but sitting unfinished for the last 5 years. Trash is not picked up; "grassy" public squares are overgrown with weeds. The infrastructure of government services that we take for granted here does not exist there. We visited a huge man-made lake where squatters build little cabins on the shoreline; the concept of owned property does not apply. Many people did not seem to have a work ethic; they expect the government or big brother to provide for them. It doesn?t, but the people are all kind of in the same boat and look out for one another. I was really struck by their honesty. Cab drivers leave their money on the dashboard. Cars piled high with trunks or furniture (those of Kosovars) were not disturbed; personal property is respected. I did not feel uncomfortable walking around the city streets after dark. Albanians are despised but they are not at the bottom of the cultural heap; that place is reserved for the gypsies! Americans naively send toothbrushes and toothpaste, but the population I dealt with does not have access to dental health professionals and does not seem to practice dental hygiene. Most adults are missing a good number of their teeth. One of the oddest advertisements on the TV was for a guy who makes false teeth!
I stayed at the apartment of Avdula Memetaj, an Albanian businessman who owns TV-ERA and has been the director of MTO for the past two years. He works tirelessly, leaving home around 9:00 in the morning and not returning until 10:00 or 11:00 at night. I got around either walking or by cab if I had a long way to go. I would have coffee at the apartment in the morning, work during the day, return to the apartment sometime after 5:00 and then go out for a meal in the evening. I would walk to an outdoor café area in a historic but somewhat rundown part of the city. There I struck up conversations with Americans, and people from other countries such as France, Germany and England. They were all there either associated with the military or for some charitable purpose.
The reason I came home early was simple: to stop using expense money that I had taken for my own expenses and instead to give that money to the MTO. While the work that I was doing was valuable, there were able-bodied refugees willing to do the work. Every meal that I bought for myself represented flour, pasta, salt and sugar for someone else. When I began to see things in those terms, I decided it would be better to return home. Yes, I DID find a lumber yard where I might have bought supplies for rebuilding. But what good is wood when the people are starving??? Many of these people will not be able to return home this year. I predict that those who do will group together several households of people, fabricate a shelter in one home for all of them and stay together for the winter. Maybe by next spring and summer they will be able to start rebuilding. We are talking about third world countries here.
Furthermore, it was not practical for me to go to Kosovo. The border guards were detaining people for 10 to 20 hours at the crossing, going in either direction. Those with press passes are exceptions, but I did not have a press pass. Also, Kosovo is still a dangerous place, not only in terms of land mines but also due to the polarized outlooks of the people, with hostility simmering and threatening to erupt.
The waste of resources by the large charities is unfortunately a fact of life. I saw many examples. One guy I talked to was there for a week staying in a 2-bedroom, air-conditioned apartment, just to assess how his organization might help. He wasn't really doing anything worthwhile. Another large charity had many white RAVs driving around, and they spent money washing them to keep them clean.
Again let me reinforce to each and every one of you how much your donation was appreciated by the MTO and by myself. You helped save lives. Leigh and I covered all my personal expenses. Your entire contribution was used directly to help refugees from Kosovo with their primary needs for food and clothing. I tried to convey also that our money represented the concern of many caring Americans who yearn to ease distress and who pray for an end to the hatred and suffering so widespread in Kosovo and the surrounding region.
In summary, the plight of the refugees is heart-breaking. I saw much pain and mental anguish in the people we served. I will never forget that. It has made my first few days back home a sad time in some ways, because I cannot shake off the misery that I witnessed. Thanks again to all of you for everything.
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