Where Are They Now?

Kermit The Frog: Retired and living of the royalties to his Pultizer prize winning book, "Growing Up Green." Occassionally does essay segments for MacNeil-Lehrer and NPR.

Miss Piggy: The so-called "Queen of the Infomercial", Miss Piggie can frequently be seen late at night hawking skin care and weight loss products. She especially enjoys showing her audience "Before" and "After" pictures which emphasize her new 120 pound figure.

Fozzie Bear: Always desperate for laughs, Fozzie made a shortlived comeback under the name "The Fozz" about five years ago as a foul mouthed and "un-PC" comedian. When that collapsed, Fozzie's drinking and drug problems came to the foreground, and he checked into Betty Ford.

Ralph the Dog: Shocked many by coming out shortly after the last muppet movie. Briefly played in Las Vegas, then decided he liked the local scene better and went back to tickling the ivories in the same bar a little outside of Chicago that he started playing at some thirty years ago.

Gonzo the Great: Cheered up remarkably after being diagnosed for depression and put on Prozac. Divorced by his first wife, Henrietta A. Cluck, Gonzo now works for a GM dealer in Atlanta.

Animal: His three public disturbance misdeamenors notwithstanding, Animal is still drumming away, currently with an obscure LA grunge band named "Verb". You may have seen him playing in the background with Pearl Jam at last year's MTV music video awards ceremony.

Sam The Eagle: Makes good money on the conservative lecture circuit.

Beaker: After Dr. Bunson Honeydew's tragic suicide in '87, Beaker moved to Delaware and starting working for DuPont, where is now an associate scientist. He is now happily married and the father of three.

Dr. Teeth: Died of skin cancer.

Scooter: After a short stint as an assistant producer at Universal (a job he obtained via his uncle's connections), Scooter decided to renounce material possessions and go find his spiritual self. He is now an apostle to the Esteemed Guru Tisarna of Nick Falls, South Dakota.