Moral to the Story


  One  morning the grade three teacher asked her students to
relate a  story in which they, at the conclusion, could relate a
well known  moral to the story.
  The teacher called on Sally. She related the story of her
uncle's chicken farm. One day a hen had laid 12 eggs. Sally knew
there would  be 12 because she had counted them. However, only 8
had survived.
  "That's an interesting story, Sally," the teacher said. "Now,
what is  the moral?" 
  "Don't count your chickens before they hatch." 
  "Very good, Sally. Now, Ishmael. You tell a story."
  Ishmael told the story of going to the market and putting all
his  eggs in one basket to take home to mother. On the way home,
he dropped the basket and all the eggs perished.
  "Don't put all your eggs in one basket," he concluded. 
  "Very good," said the teacher. "Now Little Billy. Your turn."
  Little Billy stood up.
  "Well," he began. "My dad was Vietnam in the summer of 1968.
While on  patrol in the jungle he got separated from his troop
and found  himself deep in enemy territory with only a handgun,
two granades, and a bottle Jack Daniels to protect him. When he
tried to make his  way back to his gang, he was attacked by six
well-trained Viet-Cong commandos. So brave was my dad that he
took them all out with a  single shot each. That left him with
only the granades and the  whiskey. As he made his way furthur
into the jungle, he was set upon by a half dozen more V.C.
Pulling the pin with his teeth, he let one granade fly  as the
V.C. assumed an attack position. The explosion  sent body parts
flying everywhere! It was so cool. The second wave, not learning
their lesson, came after him. Dad gave the same  treatment the
others got.
  "All he had now was a bottle of Jack Daniels. He was almost near
his troop when a another wave of V.C. set upon him. He drank the
whole  bottle with one drink, smashed the blunt end of the
bottle against a  tree and went after his attackers with wild
abandon. He fought them  all with only this broken bottle and
his wits to defend him. And he  won. He made his back to his
troop and made his way back home. HE'S  MY DAD. HE'S MY HERO!"
  The teacher was mortified. "Uh, OK. But what lesson can be
learned from all this?"
  "DON'T FUCK WITH THE OLD MAN WHEN HE'S DRUNK!"
Moral to the Story

THE END
