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First : Didn't know what I should start off with...well
first is a good place to start. Do you know that there is
no place like first place. He who said that its the participating
that counts. most probably never won anything in his whole
life....winning beats losing..p.s second place goes to the
first loser.
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Money : Who said money don't buy happiness.Gimme
a million bucks and watch me smile outta happiness. Always
borrow from pessimists. they never expect their money back...
and always keep a receipt for all the good deeds that you've
done.. just incase heaven is like the Income Tax Dept. Help
end poverty...eat the poor and downtrodden.
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Smile : Laugh for life is short..the length the
thread of a span...keep smiling..hey its the second best
thing you can do with your lips. He who laughs last didn't
get the joke.
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Age : Few women admit their age.. No man acts his.
Always be nice to those younger than you, because they are
the ones who will be writing about you.....applicable to
parents of little kids as well...they will someday decide
upon your old age nursing home. You are only young once,
but you can stay immature indefinitely
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Cats : Feed a dog it thinks you are God....feed
a cat and it thinks it is God....I hate cats..actually I
do like cats....Dead ones!!
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Arrogance : I'm not arrogant...don't call me arrogant..call
me confident...besides arrogance is an imperfection and
I Jinu.J am perfect haha. I can go from zero to arrogant
in 1.7 seconds flat.
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God : I was an atheist until I realized I was God....When
I pray to god I hear myself pray...hey just Kidding....I'm
a devout Christian and a thorough believer...Life is fragile,
handle with prayer....what is the world coming to ...down
with the holier than tho attitude,,,, down with my god can
beat up your god syndrome.
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Health : Early to bed early to rise makes a person
healthy wealthy and wise....And remember.. an apple a day
keeps the doctor away... especially if you can hit him right
between the eyes...look at me; I get enough exercise just
pushing my luck.
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Change: Someone once said that there is nothing
permanent as change...he could not have been more correct...Change
is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
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Death : Death is life's way of telling you you're
fired.....and suicide is a way of telling God...I quit before
he fires you. If there is a will there is a way? nah!!..if
there is a will I better be in it !!.
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Love: Two vowels, Two consonants,
Two fools.... if you really love someone....let him/her go...if
he/she doesn't comeback..hunt em down and put a bullet through
his/her head. When in love you put yourself at the mercy of
a stranger.
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Women : Too many women...
too little time haha....A ship is always referred to as "she"
because it costs so much to keep one in paint and powder.
Never pay heed to feminists... womanists on the other hand
are people to be respected.
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Success : Well you already know my motto in life...If
at first you don't succeed..try,try again..then cheat !!
haha....and always keep this in mind mate..Success...is
what you achieve through others hard work.
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Mr. Fix it : Over the years
I have been able to identify a lot with Tim Allen - 'Home
Improvement' ...so these words of wisdom are for those of
my genre...When all else fails, read the instructions.....if
it ain't broken.....fix it until it is..
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Virginity : Mermaids ain't mythical.....Virgins
are !!!.....Gift your spouse the greatest gift on earth...
save yourself for him/her.. nothing can be more sweeter.
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Crime : The crime rate is increasing day by day...why..well
it could be due to the fact that you can get much farther
with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word
alone....and crime would really never pay only if the government
ran it....but never steal..the government doesn't like competition....and
besides nowadays make war..not love...its much safer!!
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Sanity : Time and time again I kept being told,
"Jinu you suffer from insanity" to which I humbly
reply.."No I don't suffer from insanity....I enjoy
every minute of it"..hey we are all unique...just like
everybody else...so I guess we all are sane.....nobody believes
ya...well..if you can't convince them then confuse em..word!!We
are the people our parents warned us about.
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The Universal law : The number of people staring
at you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your
actions.
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Ecology : I'm a die hard environmentalist....I love
animals....they taste great haha....but seriously I suggest
that its high time you started thinking about the environment...water
is precious..waste it not...conserve water...shower with
your neighbors daughter !!!
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President : Parents dreaded their kids playing doctor......now
which kid plays doctor... they play 'the president' ..hey
do ya think Bill would have played 'president' if Lorena
Bobbit was the white house intern.
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Planes : A friend of mine had a conversation with
me about the recent Gulf Air crash...very unfortunate....what
can one do if in a similar situation...here is my best advice...
have you realized that no matter how big the crash they
somehow tend to retrieve the black box unscathed....so if
in a similar situation try to get in the black box.
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Smoking : You know it ain't good for ya...First
you smoke....you get cancer and then you go and sue Phillip
Morris.....One thing about smoking is that its the easiest
habit to kick....its so easy to stop smoking that my dad
stopped 19 times....this new year he is gonna stop for the
20th time.
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Congrats mate : You have finally finished the Jinuine words
of wisdom...Now you have equipped yourself with the requisite
knowledge to live in this world....now go forth and multiply..
and before I forget..since you have actually read this whole
thing...be sure to visit Fav.Links on this site and click
on the last link on the page.
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