I'm tired of hearing that annoying squeak of Republicans (and also the wheezing moan of Democrats). I've heard some right-wing sounding banter, so I'm going to spend some time talking about the Republican party. If you'd like, I'd be happy to do the same for the Dems. Don't worry, I'm an equal opportunity critic. That said, we've had 8 years of complete Republican control of our government. What are the results? Let me list them:

- 8 consecutive record years of budget deficits

- Expansion of Government to include Dept. of Homeland Security, spying programs, and all sorts of other "hands-on" government

- Perpetration of the most ill conceived and most unpopular war in the history of the nation

- Political scandals that make even Clinton blush (CIA leaks, campaign finance payola scandals, Congressmen offering homosexual advances, etc.)

- Economically crippling corporate scandals that were either ignored or sanctioned by the White House (Enron/Anderson, Tyco, sub-prime mortgage, etc.)

- Economic decline bordering on recession (banking industry expressing concerns, freeze on private equity investment, an extremely volatile market, FRB unsure of how to act, etc.)

- Continual decrease in standard of living (for the first time since the depression, average standard of living has been on the decline for nearly a decade)

- Decline of the dollar in the currency market (at the beginning of the Bush presidency the Euro was at 85c on the dollar, now it is pushing $1.50; the British Pound was $1.50 and now it is consistently at or above $2.00)

- Increase of already unsustainable trade deficits (it's now nearly impossible to buy goods in the US that were actually made in the US - sounds like the prelude to the fall of the British Empire)

- Continued record highs in CEO and top executive compensation, regardless of performance (we've seen more golden parachutes in the last 8 years than you could manufacture at Fort Knox, and consider that the CEO of Allied Health - the nation's largest insurer - is in line to make about $250 million this year while a growing constituency of actual Americans go without health coverage ... myself included)

- Blatant disregard for minimal human rights standards along with an uncomfortable number of unaddressed complaints of disenfranchisement (Bush's new migrant worker plan calls for the import of a low-wage working class who will have no rights of citizenship; illegal immigrants account for billions of dollars of the GDP, pay federal taxes, and receive no return on their economic contributions ... not even protection of their basic rights; many are still crying that their votes have not been counted, nearly 8 years later; large amounts of rights activism, including advocacy and demonstrations for gay rights, minority rights, and immigrant rights; adoption and renewal of the Patriotic Act that has gotten a worse rap from human rights watchdog groups than Stalin)

- ETC ... (the worst part ... this list isn't exhaustive)

Finally, Republicans (though they're not alone in this category) demonstrate unreasonable amounts of hypocrisy in the views they espouse as compared to the results they give:

Rep. Claim: We reduce the size of government.

Result: The Reagan term and the terms of both Bushes have managed to continue to expand the size and scope of government. Government is larger today than it has ever been in the history of the US. Ironically, the last time government contracted was under the Clinton presidency (keep in mind, I hate Clinton).

Rep. Claim: We cut spending and return money to the American people.

Result: Tax cuts ... yes (except famously under Bush I). However, record spending has marked every year of every Republican presidency since 1980. The last time government spending decreased? You guessed it ... the Clinton presidency.

Rep. Claim: The right to life is a voting issue.

Result: Republicans have sent more Americans into combat and have presided over more US troop and civilian deaths than all of the Democrats combined since LBJ.

Rep. Claim: We make the US more secure.

Result: Since instituting the "color-coding" bit for security, the US has never been at green level. While no terrorist attacks have occurred on US soil, we have now seen significantly more casualties in Afghanistan and Iraq than on 9/11. In the midst of this, we are still yet to bring many of the culprits of the planning of 9/11 to justice (6 years later).

Rep. Claim: We support the troops.

Result: Troops are often ushered into combat without necessary supplies, receiving inadequate pay, and for exorbitantly long periods of times. The most recent troop surge has necessitated the call-up of a massive number of reserves, and has forced an increasing number of active duty troops to serve tours of greater than 12 months with fewer than 12 months between tours. The Republican idea of supporting the troops, as reflected in policy: more time away from home, greater exposure to risk of death, less pay, fewer supplies, an unclear vision of the objectives of victory, and complete lack of exit strategy. If that's what it means to support the troops, I won't do it.

Rep. Claim: What's good for big business is good for America.

Result: Countless economic scandals, fiascos, policies, and payolas that have consistently defrauded the American public, decreased consumer confidence, and widened the class gap.

Rep. Claim: The free market best provides for social welfare.

Result: The free market has now priced many Americans out of health care coverage - a basic necessity; the free market has put the world on the brink of environmental crisis with no attempt at recourse; the free market has shipped millions of American jobs overseas and caused the collapse of major American economic strongholds (IE the auto industry, technological production, etc.).

In the words of Kevin Bacon in "A Few Good Men" ... "these are the facts, and they are undisputed."

My response:

1. WOW! I'm really impressed with the achievements of capitalism. A system where the rich get richer, are free to pursue corruption with little or no threat of legal recourse, can disregard human rights for economic gain, perpetuate military conflict for economic gain, and wreck the environment and social fabric for profit ... that system sounds MUCH better than socialism or communism (which, by the way, happen to be thriving in Sweden and, to some extent, Holland. The EU is much closer to socialism than the US, and their measures of value, the Euro and GDP, both now exceed the US Dollar and GDP);

2. Republicans can make me happy by doing 3 things: a. shut their lying mouths because no reasonable American wants to hear anything except "I'm sorry"; b. re-register as "independent"; c. tell all their Democrat friends to repeat steps a. and b.;

3. The crisis isn't capitalism v. communism or Republican v. Democrat. It's that somehow we forgot a few very important ideas that any 10th grader would happily explain. Let me elaborate by contrasting some widely held beliefs about what America is with the reality of what America is today:

Ideal: "Government OF the people, BY the people, FOR the people shall not perish from this earth." We presently have government OF the wealthy, BY the wealthy, FOR corporate interest.

Observed: Government OF the wealthy, BY the wealthy, FOR corporate interest.

Ideal: "All men (people) are created equal, and they are endowed ... with certain INALIENABLE rights."

Observed: Some people are more equal than others. If those others meet the standards of government bureaucracy, file the proper paperwork in a timely manner, and can demonstrate their contribution to US industry, then they might be entitled to a few basic rights. However, we reserve the right to subject them to the lowest possible standard of living, and (if they do not like this) to provide them with the worst possible attorneys should they ever attempt to seek redress.

Ideal: "I have a dream that someday my children will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."

Observed: I still have a dream and only a dream that ... Like it or not, there are a LOT of people (of all races) who think this is still only a dream.

Ideal: "Ich bin ein Berliner!" (America is supposed to be a citizen of the world community, not its ruler.)

Observed: "America ... Fuck, yeah!" The US has defied the world community, acted as the aggressor in a foreign war, and continues to pursue unilateral policy objectives and put its military behind its threats. Furthermore, the US offers near-unerring support for the country who has received the most UN censures and sanctions of any country in the world (by nearly 2 to 1).

Ideal: "Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country."

Observed: Either "what can my country do for me?" or "my country doesn't do much for me." Despite the spike in the previous presidential election numbers, Americans participate less politically than almost all industrial nations. Voter turnouts in the US are actually lower than in some countries where elections are not even free (IE Colombia). That's right, more people vote in rigged elections than in the "free" elections of the US.

Ideal: "Give us your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore."

Observed: Give us your educated, your entrepreneurial, your specially skilled yearning to be rich!

Ideal: "One nation, INDIVISIBLE, with liberty and JUSTICE for ALL."

Observed: One nation, with two disparate, inimical classes, with liberty and justice for a very high price. Ask Rodney King, the family of Mamadou Diallo, and OJ Simpson about "justice for all."

These are the promises of America that give it such great potential. Unfortunately, at this present moment, I find these famous words to be more apt: "Now we are engaged in a great civil war." We are engaged not only in a foreign civil war, but also in an ideological and social civil war over how America should be defined into the 21st century. Let us shed our ideological divisions and political affiliations to embrace that one thing we do share: our ideals, which have produced unending instances of greatness and to this point have triumphed over outstanding odds and harrowing circumstances. Let us be participants in the life of our communities and in the political expression of our values, responsible citizens of the world, welcoming to those seeking new opportunities, principled in our applications of our ideals, and let us always be creative, innovative, and exceptional individuals. This is a policy that has proven its effectiveness throughout the course of American history, and my hope is that we will adopt it sooner rather than later.

And in analyzing those last few statements, you may come to realize that what I'm advocating looks a lot more like what one might consider "communism" (in its scholarly and philosophical manifestations) than "capitalism."