Here they are, my world famous predictions. Let's get right down to it, from the bottom up: The Cellar Rat Bastards: After seeing some of his favorite Japs get deported, Rob will be stuck in the cellar. His early season ramblings about rats in hell will certainly come true. Title Hopes Die When: Ichiro pulls up lame chasing a flyball Opening Day The Bottom Dwellers Walkers Texas Rangers: Fresh off the luckiest fantasy run in sports history, Mark will take his rightful place vying just to stay out of the cellar. This strung together squad of current and former Rangers (currently 4) will do little more than sputter to the finish. Mussina will likely be the only bright spot. Title Hopes Die When: Raffy, Juando, Kent, and Glavine all spend time on the DL nWo Wolfpac: They should be docked points for making a wrestling reference to begin with. This team is strong in places, but weak in the OF, boasting Mike Cameron as the #3 guy. I'll go ahead and say it now: Brandon, how is Mike Cameron doing? Title Hopes Die When: Mike Cameron starts off 3-49 Bastian Baltimore: This team has a strong core (Vlad, Pedro, Nomar, Rivera), but lacks on the periphery. Could have a very streaky run and may even manage to jump into contention. Of course, by the time April is over that will all be a faint memory. Title Hopes Die When: David deals 3 marquee players for Pujols and a Mariner's middle reliever The Contenders Dante's Inferno: This team reminds us a lot of last year's squad with 12 players who made last year's team. The difference is that Dante has brought some arms with him in his descent. Maddux, Leiter, Colon, and Weaver should do the hellions justice and carry him in the race. Title Hopes Die When: Deadline deal for Barry Zito breaks down Ghetto All-Stars: The rags-to-riches story of the year. The Ghetto has boasts a strong OF with deep pitching in what could be the turn-around story of the year. Injuries could be a problem, but if the Ghetto stays healthy, they're contenders. Jonty is a savvy trader (minus the Knoblauch deal) who will be able to fill in holes. With last year's bad luck out of the way, the Ghetto should surprise many. Title Hopes Die When: Bret Boone is injured in a gang-related shooting The Bitter Buffaloes: With several familiar faces (Giambi, Giles, Hudson) and some talented new ones (Glaus, Wood, Soriano) this team should be a competitor all year long. Pitching, though, is a question. With a team stocked in young arms, things could go smoothly to a title, or disastrously wrong. Look for the Buffaloes to be on top of the waiver wire for pitching talent. Title Hopes Die When: Jared pulls last minute deal for Johnny Damon, only to be sorely disappoined again Seattle Cardinals: Are they Cardinal heavy? Yes. Is Buck a homer? No doubt. Is this a solid team that will go the distance? You can count on it. A solid draft has only been improved by the year's first trade. This team has offensive and pitching talent that will keep it in contention. Title Hopes Die When: David short-circuits a deadline deal for Pujols The Champ Baltimore Barbers: Top to bottom this team has no weaknesses. Brown and Clemens may be the strongest SP 1-2 punch, and Barber certainly holds the best bullpen. His hitters mix speed with power and should contribute across the board. Amazingly, there's no place this team needs help. Great draft day for Barber. He's this year's pick for champion. Other Predictions: Fantasy Hitting MVP: Sammy Sosa Fantasy Pitching MVP: Pedro Martinez Surprise Hitter: Ken Griffey, Jr. (but it shouldn't be a surprise) Surprise Pitcher: Pedro Astacio Disappointing Hitter: Bret Boone Disappointing Pitcher: Greg Maddux We're just a few days away from Opening Day now. JRod The Commish