2. So does shredded cheese, it stays clumped until just before impact then
bursts. 3. When you fall off a wall you hurt yourself, but if you are a guy you get
lots of women to take care of you. 4. Ice cream makes hair feel plastic.
5. ice cream also does not belong in a bra.
6. when abby is tickled she slowly stops breathing
7. the chili bean soup, has neither beans nor chili in it, but it sure does taste like chili.
8. squirrels are scary, and have dreams of dominating people.
9. oh and they cool paws to, especially when you see them as the squirrel advances towards you from the table next to you.
10. the doctors at the health center are very anxious to slice, dice and stitch the students.
11. salt and pepper are not good hair care products.
12. how to frolic in a fountain fully clothed.
13. how to use air freshener as a weapon.
14. always check the cheese in the salad bar before you eat it.
15. southern doughnuts and coffee aren't really doughnuts or coffee.
16. that RAs turn several shades of red when they are licked and given lap dances by a bunch of men and a woman.
17. 8:00am classes don't work.
18. how to fault in and out of windows.
19. how to get into a locked room without a key.
20. call backs to Rocky Horror Picture Show.
21. what a gummy worm tastes like when you eat it out of a stranger's mouth
22. never trust the security guys to understand what you tell them
23. that seminar credits are different from college program series credit
24. if there is nothing in your mail box, no one loves you
25. how to laminate all types and sizes of programs and posters
26. how to extract a piece of paper from the goddamn stupid fucking laminating machine.
27. what happens when your nail is completely ripped off.
28. how to make bandages out of napkins and tape.
29. how to pack for a hurricane party.
30. that it is not good to try and lift people while blasted
31. do not towel whip someone with a wet t-shirt
32. do not put abby and monica together when one is really tired and the other is really drunk.
33. to always remind the buyer to put the product in his pocket before leaving the sellers room
34. that abby remind people that they have things they have to attend
35. that classics professors are DICKS
36. that Ben and Jerry's Chubby Hubby ice cream is like heroin.
37. that hamsters can knock alarm clocks off the openings to their cage, open the hatch, and climb out on their own.
38. that K-mart has almost everything that any college student will ever need.
39. that Plato makes my brain feel funny
40. that dryers are giant pieces of shit
41. that sling is very addicting
42. that eckerd college has a special deal with florida power, wherein florida power gives eckerd a break in the fee if eckerd allows them to CUT OFF THE POWER AT VERY IN OPPORTUNE TIMES!!!!!!
43. that sunday mornings don't exist
44. that loft beds can be very dangerous, especially if you try and climb up the back of them
45. that one should not just stop anywhere in tampa to ask directions to the sundome.
46. that rasberries don't smell good when you leave them in the fridge over an evacuation period
47. just how wonderful a real shower is, especially when you need to shave your legs
48. HOW BLISSFULLY BEAUTIFUL CAFFEINE IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!
49. that air conditioning can cause hypothermia.
50. how much a candle and the little paper holder is a falic symbol.
51. how much you can get away with at the chapel before Drew Carey really gets pissed off (only some of you will understand this)
52. that long sleeve button down shirts and little courderoy shorts don't look well together.
53. even the professors don't know the campus, so don't feel bad.
54. the joys of puddle hopping.