Are Your Parents Power Rangers?
Do your parents mysteriously disappear whenever giant rubber monsters threaten major conurbations? Are they strangely worshipped by five year olds? Are you suspicious about their Lycra fetish may be something far more sinister? If so, answering our survey could help.
1. At mealtimes does your mum;
Grudgingly defrost something and serve it with chips?
Wait until nightfall then steal a virgin away from a nearby village?
Violently jerk into numerous bizarre poses before leaping high into the air and hurling plates at your head?
2. What car does your Dad drive?
An old battered Vauxhall Cavalier.
A black carriage drawn by a team of pale horses.
A 60 foot tall robot dinosaur.
3. What would you expect to find in your parent’s room?
My Parents room?!?! Why the hell would I want to go in there?
When I go down to my parent’s cellar, I usually expect to find a couple of coffins and some bats.
In Mum and Dad’s ‘command centre,’ there’s a teleporter, a giant floating head, lots of computers and a talking robot.
4. What do your parents do in the evening?
Stare at the TV, grunting occasionally.
Wake up.
Do their homework then go and ‘hang out’ at the Angel Grove Gym’n’Juice Bar.
Making the sign of the cross and watching them flee.
A martial arts show down at somewhere which looked suspiciously like Tokyo.
How Did You Score?
Mostly As
Sorry, but your parents are completely normal. Don’t worry, you’ll be moving out soon.
Mostly Bs
Your parents are actually vampires. This means you should be a vampire too. So if you’re out in the sunlight reading this, you’re history. If not try to avoid stakes through the heart and garlic bread for the rest of your life, or un-death, or whatever it is…
Mostly Cs
Your parents are Power Rangers. This means they’re squeaky clean teenagers most of the time, and rubber clad super heroes when danger threatens. This might be a bit embarrassing but consider the fact that their vastly overpriced merchandise will keep you in beer forever. If they get too annoying ask what their last name is; they won’t have a damn clue!
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