The other day, I thought my ear exploded but instead. My ear just released a lot of liquid from a previous swimming incident. It still smelled like chlorine. I didn't actually sniff this mysterious liquid, the smell permeated the room.

I sometimes wonder why friends hate my reciprocity. The other day, I was gonna approach one of my friends who was hanging out with their friends. While I was approaching, they pretended like they didn't know me. So a couple of days later, I was with a group of my friends and the subject who ignored me approached me. I did the same thing to him/her and he/she didn't like that. The next day when none of our friends were involved, he/she chewed me out for ignoring him/her. I didn't tell him/her why I did the nose-up thing. He/she has to figure it out for his/her self.

Sometimes people tell me this amazing crock of shit. This involves the call at 1am that no one wants to get. One evening, I got punched in the gut at the SRC. It lodged a piece of food in my duodenum before it had been digested. At 11pm, I started showing the symptoms of my body trying to dislodge this piece and I called a friend to take me to the hospital. What I got from them was 'Why the fuck are you calling me at 1am?' and I was hung up on. I then told a couple of people about my ER experience and several people asked me 'Why didn't you call me?' and for one of them I had to say 'I did call you'.

The English Language: I've noticed that people have a faulty relationship with English and the worst offenders are people who speak English as their first language.

One of my friends purchased a stereo that said it was CD-RW compatible. So, he was using it and got frustrated and called me at 3am. He then asked me 'How do you record CD's with the CD-RW compatible stereo?' I had to tell him 'You can't record CD's with that stereo, it means that you can listen to CD-RW CD's.' He then asked me again 'How do you record CD's with it?'

It took me 30 minutes to explain to him the concept. And all I could think was 'God DAMN! What a flaming idiot!'

I was thinking about one of my friends last month. He left awhile back and I decided to email him. Well, he replied quite enthusiatically. And we have been corresponding sending jokes and offensive stuff to me. And I got to thinking. He answers EVERY email I send him, even the ones that might be offensive.

And I think of how lonely life can be in the town I live in and how email is usually my only link to the outside world. Dude, you're an awesome friend. Thank you for making me feel less lonely.

I maintain that at the college level in a sports program, sometimes, the upperclassmen and upperclasswomen may actually contribute to more losses than wins. They also hold back the underclasspersons from gaining experience.

The coach develops a personal relationship with the upperclassperson and they hog all the play time.

For a college basketball team, for example, last year, there was a senior forward who could only make free throw shots. Otherwise, she was plagued with turnovers and errant shots. In a key game vs a conference foe (the last game of her career), she had no defense and an open lane to make a shot. She went down the open lane and missed the gym with her shot. The college went on to lose 66-67. Her basket would've been the deciding factor. There was a better forward who sat on the bench most of the season but the coach didn't play her much because of the senior. The better yet benched forward never returned to play basketball for this college. I don't blame her, their team sucks this year.

Speaking of which. I have removed ALL TRACES of Fairbanks' 98.1 radio station from all my stereos and receivers. That radio station is SO ASS! I'm surprised they have an audience [of idiots].

My modem (and my only link to the outside world outside of hockey and work) had gone kaput the other day. So, I was using the backup which was far inferior in performance. The deal was, I had to prioritize usage. I only emailed the very few people who I thought would return my emails. To the offenders that decided not to answer my emails in the past. I spared you my inconvenience and I will continue to do so even tho' I fixed my modem.

With my loose shoulder joints, flexible finger joints, and TMJ problems. I've discovered that I have a minor case of something medical that I can't mention. My hard pallate is also highly arched and I have a arm-span of 6'6. So, it's not genetics that caused my teeth to be crooked (scoff scoff at that one former friend of mine turned Euro-trash). It's the medical condition. My doctor told me that I'm lucky that it's only a minor case.

In October, I stopped hearing from one of my friends. Automatically, I assumed the worst-case scenario. I really hate not being in the know. Since I have nothing to go on, I come to terms with the fact that a friend is never going to speak to me again. So after I had came to terms and suffered 3 months of no commo, a friend tried to contact me after the communications lines were closed. I think my friend's playing games with me and I don't want any part of that. Games [of the mental variety] do not go over well with me.

I've noticed that the ''I'll never do that again'' promise is also a big hoax. I hear that a lot from many people I know but in the end, they always do it again. Since I've heard it so often, I tend to not believe it these days.

Back in December, I witnessed a car accident. I won't mention where or who was involved but it affected me. I saw that the whole entire passenger side of the 2nd vehicle was caved in almost up to the driver's side. It took me a month before I could sit in the passenger side of a vehicle again. I saw some pretty bad stuff but it was the vehicle damage that got to me, not the gore.

I had gone to a hockey game in January and while I was talking to some friends, I had this feeling that someone was staring at me. I scoped out the situation and this nasty looking christian chick was staring at me. She had the text-book christian hairdo and the christian make-up deal. I gave her the ''You make me sick'' look and stuck my nose in the air. I had nightmares later that evening.

I have a friend who has a friend who has a friend. This dude creeps me out. I never met him before in my life. I don't know his name but somehow he knows mine and claims we met before. I don't forget a face, so since I don't remember him. It's impossible for us to have met before.

So, he said ''Hi Clyde'' to me at Fred Meyer while I was shopping for condoms.

I replied ''Who the fuck are you?''.

He looked at me funny and said ''I'm **************''.

I said ''I'm sorry, but we haven't met before.''

He then said ''We lived on the same floor a while back''

I gave him a blank stare then said ''I'm sorry, we haven't met before''

The conversation ended soon after. To this day, I don't recall meeting him before but the friend of his who has a friend in common with me asked me about that and asked me why I was such an asshole to him. My reply was ''I don't like it when people I don't know approach me and make idle conversation with me in public.''

I just recently purchased a foreign (used) vehicle. The other day, on some slick roads, I got stuck in a ditch. At first, I thought I was fucked and had to call a tow truck. I remembered how I gave one of my friends advice after getting stuck on Chena Pump and I put my car in reverse. In seconds flat, I was out of that ditch. If the car had so much power in reverse, then why does it struggle going up a steep hill, like the one on Chena Ridge Road?

I was told that communication was key recently. My reply is ''If communication is key, then why aren't YOU communicating with ME?''

I had seen a friend of mine who had left Fairbanks a couple of years back at a hockey game recently. I was kinda shocked to see him again so we started talking a little. About midway thru him updating me on what he was doing lately with his degree, this blonde BABE started talking to me and I forgot he was there completely, plus, he was eating fast food so I thought I was interupting him sort of. While I was flirting with my blonde friend, my friend who had left and came back to watch hockey said ''Clyde, you're not done talking to me.'' I wasn't mad at him for interupting my moves (I was one step from being slapped) but I was flattered that he wanted to talk to me so bad.

That reminds me of something else. I went to watch a sport of a slightly different format. I have a few friends from high school that I will still talk to, two of them to be exact, one male, one female.

The male was the one at this hockey game and he had some friends with him. One of them, I had recognized as a friend of a friend of mine. I always thought that this dude didn't think much of me so I kinda left him alone during the college years. In other words, I thought that he thought I was an asshole. Well, at this game, he talked my ear off pretty much and said that he and I were in the same line at Fred Meyer a couple of hours earlier but I ignored him. I finally told him that I had the impression that he thought I was an asshole so I wound up acting like one. I guess that's what's called a self-fulfilling prophecy. The funny thing was, I told my fried that I saw their friend and my friend didn't remember the dude I was talking about.

So, since one of my friends ridiculed me about one tooth being crooked and that he thinks that ALL my teeth are crooked. Should he be the one who has to foot the $4000 bill for the braces that I will have to endure for 18 months?