Clyde's Disclaimer(s)

Or if you'd prefer
Taco's Disclaimer

This page may contain items that may harm sensitive people. If you are a sensitive people. Don't view my web page and don't gripe at me. If you are offended by something in one of my webpages, by viewing this disclaimer and/or by viewing the webpage in question, you have recinded all rights to gripe about the webpage and no further action can be taken. Should you take further action, this disclaimer waives your rights to do so. Should you waive your rights to waiver your rights, then you have no right to gripe about the questionable content. Should you proceed to gripe about the questionable content, I will sue you for breach of contract for one year's salary. Should you not have a salary, I will sue you for the equivalent of your salary and take your possessions, e.g, your house, car, engagement ring(s) because you are engaged to 6 people, pet rabbits, food, whores, girlfriends, clothing, computers, TV's, radios, gravel, beverages, water filters, coffee, condoms, furniture, silverware, china, durable goods, washers, dryers, refrigerators. The following are not legal and cannot be used as collatral: controlled substances, sawed-off artillery, explosions, stolen property, spouses, etc.

Also, there may besome bazaar typos in the vairous nooks and cranneis of my web page. Don't criticize them either, cos.....I don't really feel like dealing with thum at the present moment. :{ Should you find a typo and wish to report it, I will change it after 10,000 working days which is the fastest I can do due to ever expanding content on my website. There is no compensation for discovery of imaginary typoes and you are not entitled to property listed above unless you want my debt or discarded friends. If you wish, you may take the following from me: my allergies, health problems, disowned family members, unwanted house guests, in-laws, out-laws, college homework that needs to be turned in, computer viruses, my garbage items, i.e., rotten food, spoiled milk containers, moldy cheese, underwear older than five years, used condoms, used tissues, bloody nose rags, remnants of a pizza that I ordered 6 months ago, that CD that Jennifer broke when she used it to clean up her kitty litter poos, Jennifer's kitty litter poos, the remnants of the pile of shit I stepped in last Saturday, the bloody sanitary napkin an unwelcome guest left in my kitchen sink, the used tissue that Grant left behind when he had the urge to go solo while using my computer. You may also take the side-effects of the allergy medicine I take which include vomitting, diarrhea, headache, anal-rash, anal-itch, penile swelling, sexual side-effects in men and women, nausea, dizziness, vaginal moisture release, pre-ejaculatory flow by the gallons, nose-bleed, penile bleed, anal drip, heartburn, vomitus escaping from the nasal passages, food caught in the duodenum, incontinence, increased flatulence, constipation, tremor, fatigue, chronic bronchitis, allergies to dust and ragweed, light sensitivity, sensitivity to light and sound, skin rash, foreskin rash, rash of the nads, swelling of the testes or ovaries, allergies to seafood and poultry, indigestion, earwax build-up, memory loss, numbness of the hands and feet, stroke, heart attack, heart condition, heart murmer, permanent erection of the penis or clitoris, hypospadias, jaundice, anorexia nervosa, bulemia, insomnia, obsessive compulsive habits, paranoia, delusions, sexual insatiability, headvoices, divorce, dissolution, floaties in the eyes, growth of back hair, acne, the need for Rogaine, toenail fungus, biting of the nails, nagging complex, facial deformity, seeing nothing but rabbits in your back yard, alien abduction, anal probe, the feeling of bugs crawling up your leg and then up yours, experience the distaste of 7-Up, loss of social skills, loss of movement in your left pinky, hot flashes, the feeling you come from Alaska, having the urge for herbal, using the herbal in the shower for another couple of hours, genital goose bumps, acne, acne scars, leetches, eruption of the ear drum, liver spots, spotty liver, etc.

If you see something you would like changed, I may decide to change it, possibly. If I do feel up to changing it, please Let Me Know


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