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John Glenn Ate My Balls!!! |
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Disclaimer: Much of the contents of this page is ficticious and intended to be humorous. If you do not enjoy this type of humor do not view the rest of the page. |
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"Hello, my name is John Glenn. Senator, Astronaut, and Eater of Balls. I hope that Someday I will accomplish my ultimate goal of eating all the balls in the universe!!!" |
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Timeline of John Glenn from 1921-1999. The life of a true Ball Eating American Hero. |
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July 18, 1921 - John Herschel Glenn Jr. born is born in Cambridge, Ohio. And ate some balls.
March 1942 - Glenn enters the Naval Aviation Cadet Program. And ate some balls. |
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1943 - Glenn marries Anna Margaret Castor, graduates from Muskingum College and is commisioned in the Marine Corps. And ate some balls.
1945 & 1947 - His son and daughter are born. And ate some balls. |
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1956 - Glenn was a test pilot on Navy and Marine jet fighters in Washington. And ate some balls.
May 1, 1957 - Glenn reports to NASA Manned Spacecraft Center. And ate some balls. |
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July 16, 1957 - Glenn sets the transatlantic speed record for the first flight to average supersonic speeds from Los Angeles to New York. It took 3 hours and 23 minutes. And ate some balls. |
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Feb. 20, 1962 - Glenn is the first American to orbit the earth in the Frienship 7 capsule. And ate some balls.
Jan. 16, 1964 - Glenn resigns from NASA Manned Spacecraft Center. And ate some balls. |
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Oct. 1964 - Glenn is promoted to Colonel in the Marine Corps. And ate some balls.
Jan. 1, 1965 - Glenn retires from the Marine Corps. And ate some balls.
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1966 - Glenn becomes vice president of Royal Crown International and president in 1967. And ate some balls.
Nov. 5, 1974 - Glenn wins the Ohio Senate seat. And ate some balls. |
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1984 - Glenn's failed presidential campaign puts him $3 million in debt. And ate some balls.
Nov. 3, 1992 - Glenn is elected to the Senate for the fourth time making him Ohio's first four term Senator. And ate some balls. |
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Jan. 16, 1998 - NASA announces Glenn will be the payload specialist on the STS-95 shuttle mission in October 1998. And ate some balls. |
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Oct. 29, 1998 - Glenn becomes the oldest person in space. And ate some balls.
Jan. 19, 1999 - John Glenn Ate My Balls!!! |
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"I've already eaten all the balls on earth. Now I must |
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"I must boldly eat balls where no man |
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has eaten balls before." |
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travel into space to continue my search for balls." |
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| "Star date 22557.99. We're in persuit of a pink alien |
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| vessel. I plan to capture the aliens and eat thier balls." |
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"OH NO!!!!! It's John Glenn and he's after our balls." |
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"These are the best balls I have ever eaten." |
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"Yes Senator Glenn. These aliens |
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sure do have tasty balls." |
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"NO BEING IN THE UNIVERSE IS SAFE FROM ME!!! |
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I AM JOHN H. GLENN!!! YOU CANNOT RUN FROM ME!!! |
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I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND I WILL EAT YOUR BALLS!!!!!" |
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Sign Guestbook | View Guestbook |
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To visit the hompage of John Glenn's alma mater, Muskingum College, click here. |
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To visit Yahoo's Ate My Balls Directory, click here. |
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To visit the Mr. T Ate My Balls page, the page that started it all, click here. |
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To visit Krazy Keith's Ate My Balls Links Page, click here. |
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You are the |
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person to have your |
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balls eaten by John Glenn since |
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January 19, 1999. |
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This has been a Beefchoad Production. Brought to you by, Porno Joe, Big Dave, and Stevarino Rino. |
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Special thanks to everyone who's websites we borrowed pictures and information from. |
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