Colonel Helmet's Highly Irregulars -- Chapter 8

The Skmos had taken very well to the Saukville area, especially Sea World, Ozaukee. This Sea World, erected in 2046 had one of only 3 blue whales in captivity. Being the largest creature on earth, it was an amazing sight to behold. Being a truly massive whale, it was even more special to a Skmo. They had named this blue whale Igga Igga Bunga Whump (meaning “beautiful tight virgin whale ass”). The Skmo leadership had decreed that this blue whale be saved until America had been defeated. It would then be anally raped, butchered and feasted upon in classic Skmo fashion.

It was feeding time and the whale had come out for its first show of the day. The Skmos loved to watch the mammoth creature feed. As the beast made its first pass at the audience an audible thumping noise could be heard growing closer.

The voice of Colonel Helm cracked over the radio, “There she is, boys. You know what to do! WANG! COCK! JOHNSON!” Without Dr. Clithero around to administer medication, C. Helmet was starting to lapse back into his Scrotomascular Absogeneri very quickly. “Wang! Wang! Balls!”

Thor and Kniess looked at each other and nodded. Despite Helmet’s screaming they did know what to do. Lt.C. Kniess opened the gunnery door on the side of the heavily modified CH-47D Chinook air lift chopper and began plinking off Skmos with his Barret M95 .50 caliber sniper rifle. He unleashed a small belch as their bodies flew through the air with every headshot. As Kniess was having his warped version of fun, Thor had prepared the massive cargo net for its unlikely cargo.

Colonel Helmet was falling further into his smag fits yet he was still somehow able to swoop down at just the right instant and scoop up the massive blue whale during its feeding ceremony and lift it clean out of the water. The helicopter was barely able to lift the huge beast, but Kniess was able to hold off the Skmos long enough for a quick getaway with their strange prize.

Dr. Clithero remained tied up in his completely dark cell of ice when he heard the sounds of a chopper nearby outside. He figured that the head Skmos were he to interrogate and possible kill him. He knew that he would end up dead either way and that no matter the pain, he must not say a word. Clithero estimated the sound of the chopper to be about 300 yards away when there was an Earth-shaking thud outside. It was a strange noise, nothing like he had ever heard before followed by sounds of rejoicing by the Skmos.

As the chopper flew away the stunned Skmos did not know what to think of this massive creature lying mostly dead in the middle of their camp. This was the largest whale by far that any of them had seen. Not knowing quite what to make of the situation, the Skmos did only what their instincts told them to, line up behind the behemoth to anally rape it. Being the highest-ranking officer in the camp, Skmo commander Oligotwontan was allowed the first chance to do what he wished with the creature. He dropped his pants and inserted his shriveled manhood into the anus of the blue whale. He paused, for something didn’t seem right, this particular whale’s anus felt awfully a lot like steel.

The round from Lt.C. Kniess’s .50 caliber rifle ripped through commander Oligotwontan and also obliterated the manhood of the 15 Skmos directly behind him. Major Thor cut the belly of the whale wide open with his Cobray Street Sweeper 12-guage shotgun. Major Thor easily cut down what was left of the Skmo rape-line with his shotgun while Lt.C. Kniess set up a sniper post atop what was left of the whale. Colonel Helmet swung the chopper back around and swooped low over the camp looking for anyplace that Dr. Clithero may have been held. Tragically, there had been a slight miscalculation. No one had considered the load of alcohol that Lt.C Kniess would bring along with him when calculating fuel usage. The extensive library of different whiskeys and beers had weighed the chopper down more than the whale had and now the chopper was running on fumes. Colonel Helmet struggled with the controls and put the chopper down into the softest thing he could find, an igloo.

As soon as Dr. Clithero heard the sound of the .50 caliber rifle he knew what was going on. He knew that the only fucker goofy enough to tote that size gun around was Lt.C. Kniess. He knew that only in a few minutes he would be able to once again drink wine and wrestle himself to the ground. As these happy thoughts were going through his head, a stray .50 bullet cut through the side of the igloo and blew apart the chair Clithero was tied to. The shot missed his massive cock by mere inches. With the ropes loosened, the doctor was able to free himself and get out the door of the igloo just in time to see Colonel Helmet gracefully pilot the large helicopter into the igloo he just escaped from.




Chapter the First
Kapital Zwei
Chapter the Third
Capitolo Quattro
Kapitel Funf
Enemy Scene (chapter 6)
interlude (chapter 7)
Chapter 8
chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter the Tenth
Chapter 11
12 Chapter
Chapter 12
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