1. GK ERIC PETERS ("Big Man")
Ht. 6'9" Wt. 200 Age 23
Ottawa, Ontario
Previous Clubs: Carleton University, Hellenic Bytowners

Eric joins the Royals after several years of toiling with less fashionable clubs in the Ottawa area. Almost a giant, Eric starred for Carleton in the CIAU last season and was scouted by Coach Walker at the annual Athletic Awards Banquet. Unlike most of his teammates, Eric seems to be both likeable and intelligent. Favourite Keeper: Steve Ball

1. GK STEVE BALL ("Stevie")
Ht. 5'11" Wt. 175 Age 29
Toronto, Ontario
Previous Clubs: Too numerous to list

Now in his fiftth year with the club, Steve has continued to show the strong improvement which marked his first eleven years at Carleton University. A former disciple of the Gianni Martini system, Steve has perfected a sleep-deprivation training system for Carleton Athletics, where he is the Athletic Director. Seems to be dating a lot. Favourite current player: Earl Cochrane. Favourite keeper: Roddy McFall

2. FB ANDY NERA ("Butcher")
Ht. 5'11" Wt. 185 Age 31
Manila, Phillipines
Previous Clubs: Carleton University

Andy was part of the Royals' dream draft of 1984, which saw fellow juniors Lyndon Hooper and Dean Sayer move on to the Canadian National team. Andy declined this offer and instead remained with the Royals. Andy and Vinny Jones produced a best-selling video last year, "No Stranger to the Foul", which can be purchased at fine stores everywhere. Coaches his girlfriend Laura at Nepean United who has mastered the Nera specialty moves: toe kick and forearm shiver. Favourite player: Willy Murray

3. FB MARTY LAUTER ("Big C")
Ht. 6'1" Wt. 205 Age 30
Stuttgart, Germany
Previous Clubs: Maple Leafs, Carleton University, Ottawa Intrepid

The team captain, Marty has been with the Royals for seven years since the collapse of the CSL. Marty's wedding to Keeg this summer is shaping up to be one of the team highlights. The origins of Marty's unusual nickname remain shrouded in the mists of Carleton folklore, although Rory Kerr has begun some research. Has the largest personal fan support on the team based on other players' wives and girlfriends. "Sam Malone". Favourite player: Fieldmarshal Rommel

5. SW JOHN WALSH ("Walshie")
Ht. 6'1" Wt. 185 Age 34
Hamilton, Ontario
Previous Clubs: Laurentian Community College, Swiss Chalet Selects, Hamilton Steelers

John has been part of the Royals backbone since 1986, and is a former player-coach. Has recently moved out of digs he shared with three other promising youngsters in the Royals system at the "House of Broken Dreams". Fast-rising government exec. Can be readily identified on the field by his trademark "Touch of Gray" hairstyle, for which he runs a succesful advertising promotion. Favourite player: Fred Juett

16. CB GRAEME WEEKS ("Polka/Barry")
Ht. 6'1" Wt. 180 Age 34
Essex, England
Previous Clubs: Concordia University, Wolverhampton Wanderers, Scottish Schoolboys Select

Another one of the Royals imports, Graeme was spotted by Chief Scout James Meddings while playing for Wolves. Career in Canada marred by injuries to teammates. Known as the snappiest dresser on the side, Graeme also tours in the offseason with his Bee Gees cover band, "Staying Alive". A scratch golfer, Graeme was also the winner of the MVP award at last year's Pat O'Kane Cup. The most disorganized human on the planet. Favourite player: Graeme Weeks

12. MF DAVE FOLEY ("Wee Man")
Ht. 5'2" Wt. 155 Age 31
St. John, New Brunswick
Previous Clubs: Winnipeg Fury, UMan Bisons

Another valuable acquisition with the demise of the CSL, Dave is one of the co-owners of the Corel Centre near Kanata. Now a first-time father, Dave is the most responsible member of this year's side. Also works as team trainer. Dave was 1995's MVP for the Royals. Surprisingly good in the air and cocky on the piss. Favourite player: Billy Bremner

20. CB/SW/MF EARL COCHRANE ("Eddie/Flamer")
Ht. 6'0" Wt. 180 Age 28
Toronto, Ontario
Previous Clubs: Scarborough something, Carleton University, Penang

The bizarre man is back with the club after spending a year in the Malaysian professional league (see the Royals in the News section). Loads of honours in football at Carleton have not rubbed off on the golf game. Can be found at GrabbaJabba or Atomic depending on the hour. Seriously weird clothes. Favourite player: Ian Martin

14. MF FRED JUETT ("Grumpy")
Ht. 5'9" Wt. 170 Age 33
Berlin, East Germany
Previous Clubs: Laurentian Community College, Ottawa Intrepid

Fred is the longest serving Royal, going back to 1983, with spells in the CSL. Easily the club's most genial and laid-back individual, Fred is playing some of his best football under new coach Walker. Holds league record for 212 consecutive matches without a shot on goal. Owns and operates the Coliseum indoor center. Father of two, Fred loves to binge. Fred credits teammate John Walsh with rescuing his career after several off-field incidents. Last seen outside Atomic Disco with Coliseum cap and thongs - please call home. Favourite player: Sean Holmes

8. MF DAVID McFALL ("Shatner")
Ht. 5'10" Wt. 160 Age 29
Carrickfergus, Northern Ireland
Previous Clubs: Carleton University, Linfield, Jordanhill Academy

David returned to the Royals last season after a one-year stint with Jordanhill in the Scottish Premier Division. David is a schoolteacher at the Hull Penal Detention Centre. He also coaches and provides guidance for the Royals Women's Premier Team and the Boys' Under 12s. An ever-present on the Royals Executive, David is one of the best-organized and dedicated club men. Secret ambition is to be a hard man. Shatner won a special award from the City of Ottawa in February for contributions to women's athletics but was forced to return it. Favourite player: George Best

4. MF/FWD DENNIS TAYLOR ("D")
Ht. 6'1" Wt. 195 Age 30
London, England
Previous Clubs: Glens Falcons, Ottawa Intrepid

Dennis shattered the club record transfer fee in May, 1996 after a tribunal decision allowed him to become a restricted free agent. In landmark deal, signed along with his father Bert. Involved with the cable and telecommunications business, Dennis moved into management after four years of hosting his own fashion program. Has a Y105 bumper sticker. Still needs some work on tackling and shooting. His hat-trick in last-year's Cup Final made Dennis a finalist for Sunshine Boy of the year. Favourite player: Julian Loy

11. MF RICHARD McFALL ("Rasta")
Ht. 5'10" Wt. 160 Age 31
Carrickfergus, Northern Ireland
Previous Clubs: Carleton University, Capital Office Interiors

Richie was also part of 1984's dream draft alongside Mark Donagher. The team's most talkative individual, Richard is also the best header in the Royals organization. Has moved into luxury digs with girlfriend Helen in Chinatown. Last seen heading for another airport with Pentagon security aides. No relation to David McFall. Enjoys weightlifting, playing the guitar and drinking. Favourite player: Nick Dawson

6. MF DECLAN BONNAR ("Branco")
Ht. 6'3" Wt. 205 Age 25
Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
Previous Clubs: Lynwood Spirits, Carleton University, Santos

Younger brother of Middlesborough's Brazilian ex-midfielder. Moved to Ireland as youth and starred for Ballymena. "David May". Has written best-selling book on how to cure anorexia while sleeping twelve hours a day. Failed business endeavours include record store and security firm in Kanata/Bells Corners. Prospects are looking up as assistant florist. Now in his sixth year with Royals after turning down large transfer bid from Rob Smith of the Falcons. Favourite player: Andy Cole

10. MF MIKE LOCKE ("Mikey")
Ht. 5'11" Wt. 160 Age 19
Ottawa, Ontario
Previous Clubs: none

The first third-generation Royal, Mike's grandfather Nick played with Juett and Coach Walker. In his first year with the club Mike progressed well, but occasionally forgets his lunchbox or crayons after practice. Worst tattoo and best looking mum on the squad. Mike dreams of moving into 148 Percy. Favourite player: Mark Hearns

17. MF ANDREW WOOLDRIDGE ("Wooly")
Ht. 5'11" Wt. 170 Age 24
Calgary, Alberta
Previous Clubs: Calgary Chinooks, obscure ethnic teams from Toronto

Wooly fulfills a life-long dream by playing for the Royals. After dodgy spells with Maple Leafs and others, he will be reunited with some former Carleton teammates. False rumour: Doesn't drink. Sweet left foot. Often mistaken for David McFall at nightclubs. Recommended by Sandy Mackie. Favourite player: Naoki

13. FWD ROB SAXBERG ("Ruby")
Ht. 5'8" Wt. 160 Age 27
Manotick, Ontario
Previous Clubs: Rideau Rovers, Goulbourn, Carleton University

Robby is a seven-year Royals veteran and another schoolteacher. Best dunker on the team and former member of Canadian National Basketball team. Has finally moved from Manotick where he also runs a brewery. "There was a conflict with my video card". Will have to work on pace again this year. 1996 MVP and top-scorer with 22 goals. Favourite player: Alan Dixon

9. FWD WILLY MURRAY ("Wally")
Ht. 5'11" Wt. 165 Age 29
Ottawa, Ontario
Previous Clubs: University of Toronto

Willy is entering his eleventh year with the club, and hopes to add to his seventeen goal total of last year. Leads Royals all-time in cautions and sending-offs. Lives in his car. Willy designs his own trademark tracksuits and kit bags in the off-season and hopes to land a major contract. He was also called to the bar in 1997 and hopes one day to represent himself in court. Willy likes to golf and scrap. Favourite player: none

10. FWD PHIL CRAGG ("Chunky")
Ht. 5'11" Wt. 200 Age 27
Leicester, England
Previous Clubs: Ottawa Intrepid, Tim Horton Selects, Carleton University

Phil is also a veteran player despite his relative youth and brings much-needed pace and fitness to the Royals' front line. Phil was recently recognized by Carleton for succesfully completing every first year Arts course the University had on offer.Hobbies include checking his phone messages every fifteen minutes. Yum, yum, yum, yum. Phil owns his own florist business in Orleans, where he hopes to recreate the Duke hiring spree of the 1980s which fuelled Canada's recovery. Has moved into trendy new bachelor digs on Elgin Street. Ladies Beware! Favourite player: Tony P.

Coach JAMES WALKER ("Spotty")
Ht. 5'10" Wt. 160 Age 35
Dumbarton, Scotland
Previous Clubs: Queen's University, Kingston Azores, Hutnik Warszawa

Second-year coach Walker has settled in well after a three year stint with Polish First Division side Warsaw Irish Rovers. A long-time player with the Royals before going to the continent, Walker's easy-going manner and relaxed style fit in well with the current team. Like Robbo and Strachan, actually played in a few games last year. Currently being linked with Beezer Home side Economist United. His hobbies include woodworking, lawn-mowing, smoking and arguing with Kazza. Favourite player: Andrew Glascott

Back to the Royals home page

---

This page hosted by Get your own Free Home Page