Stephen Ellison Top 5:

1. Stirling (SA) -- great team, very unlucky.
2. Avalon (NSW) -- 80 points from 4 appearances, consisting of 4 1sts.
3. Nareen (Vic) -- I will admit they were unlucky against Pt Broughton in that semifinal.
4. Childers (Qld) -- best team to come out of QLD.
5. Gawler (SA) -- best team to never make a grandfinal. But that's what happens when you come from the same state as Stirling. Stephen Ellison Dreamteam
   1. Steve Borgas (c) [Gawler] (SA) -- what a star.
   2. Michael Naughton (vc) [Melbourne City] (Vic) -- strong as an ox.
   3. Donna Sedgeman [Avalon] (NSW) -- a rabbit.
   4. Debbie Able [Loganholme] (Qld) -- manouvered obstacle courses better than a lot of guys would have (i.e. Frank Gleeson, etc).
   5. Richard Luff (emerg) [Mitcham] (SA) -- was a professional sprinter, and carried the rest of his team.
   6. Yvonne Holmes (emerg) [Stirling] (SA) -- was the only girl who could play games like 'Slip Ball' competently. Stephen Ellison Nightmare Team
      1. Frank Gleeson (c) [Frankston] (Vic) -- Did you expect anyone else.
      2. Ian Robertson (vc) [Woodville] (SA) -- couldn't even stand up in 'Pool Poker', let alone carry any chips.
      3. Linda Worsnop [Mt. Gravatt] (Qld) -- too scared of heights to even attempt to catch the loaves of bread in 'Pirate Baskets'.
      4. Leslie Gray [Manly] (NSW) -- couldn't run up the hill in 'Bridge the Gap', let alone try to jump across the gap.
      5. Wally Shaeller (emerg) [Mordialloc] (Vic) -- quite a portly fellow.
      6. Helen Avrim (emerg) [Thornbury] (Vic) -- lead her team to defeat very well.
      P.S. I still can't believe there are people out there who like IAK as much as I do. Steve Ellison IAK Conspiracy Theory I've come up with a huge IAK theory, which should be documented, even if it's detrimental to the legacy of my favourite team, Stirling.
      
      In short, I have concluded that Gawler should have made the 1987 Grand Final, not Stirling, and that Melbourne City should have won it. And my theory is as follows:
      
      In the last event of the 1st Semi Final (Rollin' Hoops), Avalon came home with a mad rush to grab 2nd place away from Gawler. After careful analysis of the footage, it is evident to me that Daryl Johnson (Avalon) fell out of the hoop at least a metre before the line, which should disqualify them, and award the 2 points for 2nd place to Gawler. This would take Gawler's tally for the night to 20 points.
      
      Stirling also scored 20 points in their semi-final, and on a count-back, both teams scored an aggregate of 60 points in their 4 heats, so we give the Grand Final berth to the team who had the highest individual score in a heat (à la Benalla/Eltham 1986). This goes to Gawler with that phenomenal 24-point heat which you already have in your galleries.
      
      Now you have Gawler in the grand-final with Daisy Hill, Melbourne City, and Avalon (who still make it, even with those points taken away).
      
      Now if you remember the grand-final, and the final score: 10-11-12-10. Melbourne City were beaten by a point. But they used their joker in 'Fall of the Roman Empire', in which Naughton (or maybe Bolton) was pushed into the turning pillar, and they ending up coming 3rd. My theory is that with Borgas in the game, they wouldn't have had the confidence to use their joker in that event, and would have probably used it in either 'Pirate Baskets', 'Frankenstein', 'Spin Out', or 'Wild Cat Gusher Gang'. They scored points in all of these events, and with the joker-double, this would have pushed them to at least 13 points, and hence the win.
      
      Does that say something about how little uni work I do??
      
      

      Comments from The It's a Knockout Web:

      This is an interesting theory Steve has come up with, and I'm sure three quarters of IAK fans would have preferred Stirling out of the Grand Final altogether. Despite Stirling's popularity amongst SA fans, the ultimate realisation of Borgas' skill was tragically just out of reach (twice).
      
      Objectively though it is difficult to project the countback system of 1986 onto this type of 1987 result. The 1986 scoring system did not normally take into account absolute point score, instead rewarding ordinal position (winner gets 6 points, 2nd 4 points and 3rd, 2). This scoring system gave a high probability of producing identical round scores within states, as happened with Benalla and Eltham. In order to separate the teams for purposes of selection for a Semi Final, a countback of total points scored over all events was taken. Understandably this situation would have been upsetting for the team that missed out (in this case Eltham), and it appears that the IAK producers changed the scoring system for 1987 to avoid such situations. For 1987, aggregate points for all events were recorded as team points, as if an Eltham/Benalla style countback was done automatically. This does reduce the probability of team aggregates being equal within a state, but this does raise questions about the resolution of ties in this system. It's academic, of course, but I would expect the winner would be the team that had the most event wins (equivalent to the original Brownlow Medal (AFL/VFL) countbacks where the winner was the person that had the most 'Best on Grounds' or, failing that, the most 'Second-best on Grounds' etc.), although Steve's suggestion of highest top score in the heats could have been used. Steve's theory could be tested against my idea (any volunteers?). Difficulties with the value of Joker points are forseeable.
      
      Steve isn't the only fan to have talked-up Melbourne City's misfortune in their 1987 Grand Final loss to Daisy Hill. Tommy agrees, as does Chris Dickinson (see below).
      
      A random thought from Andrew: wouldn't it be great if they had a 'legends' remake with some of the original champs like Borgas, Privett, Cornish, Jordan, Knaggs, Murrell, Rankin, Rankin, Brown, Walsh, Gleeson, Evans, Weatherall, Draheim, Naughton, Bolton. A veritable cavalcade of stars.
      
      P.S. How about me? I'm doing a Ph.D! Steve Ellison Ultimate IAK Episode I thought I'd give you my ultimate episode of IAK:
      
      
      • Event 1: Mountain Climbing
      • Event 2: Marathon Monks
      • Event 3: Jolly Giant Sailors
      • Event 4: See Saw
      • Event 5: Noah's Knockout
      • Event 6: Steeplechase
      (Mountain Climbing has to be done early in the evening. Otherwise no-one can do it).

      Comments from The It's a Knockout Web:

      You cruel bastard. You could have been an IAK writer, judging by this selection of physically gruelling and dangerous events!
      Mountain Climbing is traditionally a final event for a round, and in that position it really separates the very very very good from the very very good. Anyone with sub-olympic fitness usually never has a chance, but running this steep-wall event earlier in the night could also make the competition very interesting.
      Marathon Monks is a good all-round obstacle course, requiring strong athletic and water skills, over a heat and a final. Do not attempt unless you are Melbourne City/Stirling/Childers/Avalon etc.
      Jolly Giant Sailors: Powerlifting (à la 'World's Strongest Man' competitions) skills come in handy in this obstacle course, involving the famous giant sailor costumes and treasure chests. Do not attempt unless your given name is 'Steve' and surname is 'Borgas'.
      See Saw: What's up Steve -- are you getting kickbacks from reconstructive and orthopedic surgeons? Seriously though, See Saw is a fantastic test of communication and coordination. Subtlety is the key and a tremendous sense of balance is required, to avoid getting killed.
      Noah's Knockout -- I doubt Derek van Veldhuisen would agree with this one -- it KO'd him for the season. Good choice!
      Steeplechase: It is always good to chuck in a fake horse event for good measure. If they haven't broken their backs by this stage this should do the trick.
      
      Thanks Steve! I would love to see this episode! From Chris Dickinson Chris Dickinson Top 5 Hey I did a top five and bottom five actually for me :)
      
      
      1. Childers (Qld)
      2. Melbourne City (Vic)
      3. Stirling (SA)
      4. Daisy Hill (Qld)
      5. Sydney City (NSW) Chris Dickinson Bottom 5
         1. Woodville (SA) I think they where about as equal as Frankston...Scored 0 in three of their heats and 6 points in one of em...
         2. Frankston (Vic) heheh need I say more ?
         3. Preston (Vic)
            
         4. Loganholme (Qld)
         5. Rockhampton (Qld)
         It was actually hard thinking up a Bottom 5..I'm not biased at all but I must admit when I was younger I did barrack for Queensland...Sometimes hardly scoring 0...Except for a few times...Dalby etc lol. After watching some episodes of Knockout the past two days... I really can't stand Vince Sorrenti..He was just soooooo NOT funny..Reminds me of Tim Ferguson..I HATE that guy with a vengance lol... :) A friend of mine has the whole series of Knockout from 87.... I must admit though my favourite series was the first series...I love all those names at the end..Peanuts, Heels, etc :) Chris Dickinson Dreamteam
         1. Steve Borgas (c) [Gawler] (SA)
         2. Curt Draheim (vc) [Eltham] (Vic)
         3. Donna Sedgeman [Avalon] (NSW)
         4. Sue Nagel [Melbourne City] (Vic)
         5. Belinda Shiel (emerg) [Sydney City] (NSW)
         6. Michael Naughton (emerg) [Melbourne City] (Vic)
         In my opinion Steve Borgas would be one of the greatest competitors in Knockout, closely followed by Curt Draheim. Michael Naughton displayed impressive talents and Donna Sedgeman was really great too. The Melbourne City team were fantastic and I thought they should have won the '87 Grand Final. To date I think the best series was '86 although I wish I could see more again. Chris Dickinson Ultimate IAK Episode
         • Event 1: Tweedle Dum & Tweedle Dee
         • Event 2: Wreck the Battleship
         • Event 3: Shoot for the Sun
         • Event 4: Penguins
         • Event 5: Tour de Knockout
         • Event 6: Lifebuoys
         Chris Dickinson Top 10 IAK Games
         1. Tout de Knockout
         2. Penguins
         3. Wreck the Battleship
         4. Lifebuoys
         5. Head Hunters
         6. Timebomb
         7. Steeplechase
         8. Musical Chairs
         9. Martians
         10. Frankenstein
         tHERE YOU GO :)

         Comments from The It's a Knockout Web:

         Chris you seem to have a taste for the elaborate. I like it! There are some excellent and original choices here, including Head Hunters and Timebomb. The It's a Knockout Web Copyright ©1997-2002 Andrew Gray.