The Reserves
Brent Tarasof - aka He-Man...Utility Power Hitter
Candace Shaw - aka Laughalot...Catcher/Scorekeeper
Scott Hendrick - aka Voodoo...Pitcher
Andre Peloquin - aka City Boy...Pitcher
Stacey Konschuk - aka Team Originator Who Gets No Credit for Originating the Team and Feels That We Stole It From Her Which is Too Bad Cause the Switchmillers Rock and Her Jealousy is Kind of Sad Really...2nd Base
Cal - aka Goob...3rd base
Richard (Dick) Switchmiller has taken on the unwanted duties of team manager, equipment boy and Schnapps supplier. My favourite, if not everyone's, Dick tale (oh my) has to be from an infamous tournament in Indus. Dick decided to spend the the 6 hour break between games tossing back a bottle of tequila. He declared himself, "10 feet tall and bulletproof" and helped another team take batting practice by catching all balls that came over the homerun fence barehanded. Dick took centre field in our game, and immediately showed his prowess. A very large and powerful opposition batter drilled one of those McGwire-like pop-ups to centre field. It was high enough that later on someone commented, "Dick had time to pitch a tent under that bad-boy". Regardless, when the ball came down Dick was still in position with both hands raised to the sky. He even held that position when the ball dropped 10 feet behind him. We lost that game.
Derek Switchmiller (also the web author) is the softball equivalent to Omar Vizquel. His range defies definition, his arm is live and accurate and he hits for power and average. Often him teammates criticize him for not letting the others/girls/right fielder make plays on balls hit right to them. Typical to such a talent Derek counters that for the sake of the team, and in true Switchmiller tradition, he must apply his abilities to the fullest extent on all plays. He does, on occasion, allow for his fellow Switchmillers to chase down the odd hit. Conflict does occur on occasion when, for example, he tells the second base-person that they are to cover the bag in a double play situation and then he promptly takes it himself.
Jackie Switchmiller is the team's supplier of cookies, beauty and fear of dogs. A former Easterner Jackie has adapted to the Switchmiller theology easily and without incident. That is excepting, of course, the flashbacks she stills has to her initiation. Jackie can always be relied upon to complain about the length of games, the coolness of the summer air and how none of the dogs in the area are on leashes. She is also renowned in the league for her blazing speed on the base paths.
Habbie Switchmiller is the team's first baseman, speedster and a really nice guy considering his father. "Stretch", as he is is also known, received his name for the obvious talent of stretching his body to help put runners out at first base. It is a regular occurrence for him to pull his Hextall (hockey fans know what I mean) while doing so. It is also a regular occurrence for him to drink himself useless on the Saturday night of a tournament. A classic was the annual Pete Knight Rodeo Day's tournament. Sunday after the drunken barn dance Habbie took his usual spot at first base to start the game. Two innings in he had screwed up 3 ground balls. He was benched in favour of Tex Switchmiller. In the fourth inning Tex was eaten up by yet another ground ball. In his hung-over drawl Habbie quipped, "That's a bad place to stand".
Tina Switchmiller is a multi-tasking player, who works both as catcher and rover. The nickname of Betty is a classified tale. It was, and remains, no mystery how she came to receive the now applied name of One-Eye. Tina is a true Switchmiller and proved it one fateful day playing catcher. An opposing batter slammed a shot over our Ryan in center. This particular opponent also possessed pretty good wheels. Ryan ran it down at the fence and hit Derek just behind second base. The call to throw home came and Derek spun and let one loose. Unfortunately it wasn't one of his better throws and it actually came in a little up the third base line. Tina moved to grab it, even though the runner had it clearly beat and fate stomped on her. The ball short hopped, took a bad bounce right up into her face. All Derek heard was the crunch of her sunglasses. When the dust cleared nothing was broken. But Betty had a nice shiner. 4 days later she was a bridesmaid at a friend's wedding. Another 4 days after that, back on the field Betty discovered it was Derek who actually threw the ball. "I was wondering why he was being so nice? Calling to see how I was?". Derek claims he would have called even if it hadn't been him.
Ryan Switchmiller is our rather notorious center fielder, possessing a stupid amount of power, ability to throw from the fence to the plate without any apparent effort and a tendency to announce the team's arrival in any bar at any time. On a number of occasions it has been a strange or unexpected break in the pounding music when a familiar voice, Ryan's, will belt out, "Switchmillers in da house!". Sometimes Ryan asks for the mike, sometimes he doesn't. Depends on his mood, and the DJ's appreciation for all that is Switchmiller.