*The scene opens and we find ourselves inside a bar. Not much going on inside the bar, seeing as it's the middle of the day. Sudenly, we see none other than Evan Douglas walk in. Evan stops and looks around the bar. He walks up to the bartendar who is wiping off some glasses.*
Evan Douglas: Hey, Jack Daniels in here?
Bartendar: You see him in here?
Evan Douglas: Ah, we have a smartass on our hands here. Where is he?
Bartendar: I dunno. He came in here about ten minutes ago, grabbed a bottle of Old No.7 and said he was headed for the road.
Evan Douglas: What road?
Bartendar: I dunno. He just said road.
Evan Douglas: Yeah...thanks.
*Evan puts his sunglasses back on and heads back out the bar. The scene cuts and we find none other than Jack Daniels in fornt of us. Daniels is standing in the middle of a street, just looking down what seems like an endless road. A limo pulls up, the door swings open and Evan Douglas steps out of the limo.*
Evan Douglas: Jack...what the hell are you doing in the middle of nowhere staring down an empty road?
Jack Daniels: *In a soft tone of voice* This is it Evan. We only have one more trip down this road before it's all over.
Evan Douglas: Before what's all over?
Jack Daniels: Our rasslin' careers...well for you maybe. But for me...my drunken life.
Evan Douglas: WHAT?! You....you're giving it up? You're giving up your Old No.7?
Jack Daniels: *Finally snaps out of his haze* No ya bastard. What in the hell are ya talkin' 'bout? Ya see Evan, for ya, rasslin' might have been a somethin' to pass the time. Or maybe just a quick buck to keep ya goin'. But ya see, for this drunken bastard...for Jack Daniels...it was...no...it IS his FUCKIN' DRUNKEN LIFE! And if this drunken bastard is gonna go out...he's goin' out on fuckin' top.
Evan Douglas: Now that's the Jack Daniels Evan Douglas knows and that's what I like to hear....*****start the smack, can use that lead in line if you want, thought it might help the flow a bit********
Jack Daniels: Now would ya look at this pairin'...Bazooka Joe and TME. Both of these sums bitches haven't been in action or even heard from in the past two years...and all of a fuckin' sudden, they think they deserve to be a part of this tourney. They think they deserve to go out on top. Well...Jack Daniels has got four words for ya. OVER MY DEAD DRUNKEN BODY!
Evan Douglas: That was five Jack.
Jack Daniels: And that was for every little single jackass on the MTT4 roster. Yeah that includes ya TME. Jack Dnaiels hasn't forgotten 'bout your Nyquil drinkin' ass just yet. It was ya that made Jack Daniels wanna go out there and by all the fuckin' Nyquil in one city and drink it. I wanted to see how it stood the test 'gainst my Ol' No.7. And when I stepped into that squarede circle with ya TME...when Jack Daniels stepped into that Hell in a Cell with ya for one fuckin' hour...as fucked up as he was by that damn Nyquil, he still whooped your ass and took the gold ya wanted so damn much. How did that make ya feel TME? Shit, how the fuck would your Nyquil drinkin' ass remember? Ya were too damn busy prayin' that Jack Dnaiels wouldn't whoop your sorry ass 'gain. But he did. And ya knew it was comin'. Ya opened up that book ya always carried 'round with ya and saw it in front of ya.
What's the matter TME? Didn't quite get all of that? Well what the fuck do ya expect from someone who indulges on Nyquil? Have 'nother TME and step into that ring for one last time with your drunken herp Jack Daniels. It's alright to admit that Jack Daniels is all that's holy. Just keep sayin' ito toyurself TME...just keep sayin' it.
Evan Douglas: ********EVAN SMACK********
Jack Daniels: How could this drunken bastard forget 'bout good ol' Bazooka Joe? Here's an answer for ya...maybe that's cuz no one remembers the sorry bastard. Let's see, he had a run as TV champ or IC Champ or some lower level title that no one really gave two shits 'bout cuz at the given time, this drunken bastard was your World Champ. And seein' as how everyone was gunnin' for Jack Daniels...how everyone in the arenas paid to see Jack Daniels...how everyone was havin' a drink on Jack Daniels...how could ya expect them to remember a piece of gum with a cheesy comic and fortune? Ya know, maybe if ya remembered to put that little eye patch on, then ya wouldn't be in this position today. Instead, ya went for the drill sergeant bit. Ya figured it would come off as more serious and intimidating then someone with a corny joke and an eye patch. But ya see BJ, in the end it really didn't matter what ya went with, cuz ya would find yourself in the same exact position...as a nobody bent over in front of TME yellin' the snifflin' sneezin', stuffy nose...yeeaah ya know the rest. And ya might even know what Jack Daniels is 'bout to tell ya know, but ya know what? He's gonna tell ya anyway so it gets through your thick head maggot. Ya don't stand a fuckin' chance 'gainst a coherent, experienced team like Absolute Power. Here...let Jack and Evan put it in simplier terms for ya bastards...
Jack and Evan:
*Daniels takes a swig from his bottle of Old No.7 as he looks down this long road.*
Jack Daniels: Let's go Evan...we got ourselves a long journey down this road.
Evan Douglas: And it starts with Bazooka and TME this week. They just have no idea of what's heading their way.
*Daniels and Douglas begin down this road as the scene fades to black.*