(The scene opens and we find ourselves in the back parking lot of the Providence Civic Center. All seems fine and dandy until we get a glimpse of the five men who make up quite arguably the most powerful faction here in the NEWF...Armageddon. Wait a second...Michael Draven, Jack Daniels, Bazooka Joe and Evan Douglas...that's only four. So why is there five of them making there way into the arena? Could it...could that be a...*GASP*...a FIFTH ARMAGEDDON MEMBER? I guess we're about to find out, aren't we. The fifth guy is walking wearing a black hooded sweatshirt, withthe hood covering his face and his head looking down at the ground. As they walk by, the camera tries to ge under the hood and get a shot of just who that is until an irrate Jack Daniels shoves the camera out of the way...)

Jack Daniels: You're just gonna have to wait you're fuckin' turn like everyone else. So back the fuck up 'fore we knock ya the fuck out. And just for the record, this here...(Daniels grins and points to the hooded mystery man), this surprise is gonna blow the roof off this motherfucker. This is the surprise of the century. Ya thought last week was something to drop your jaw at? This week, every mark's bottom jaw is gonna be six feet under the ground when they get a load of this revolutionary acquisition. DFR...get ready motherfuckers...

(What the hell does Daniels mean revolutionary acquisition? What the hell is going on? More importantly...who the hell is that? Scene fades as Armageddon plus one enters the building...)

***********************************************

(Finally, the match has come to an end and has done it's job of putting these fans to sleep. But things are about to change a bit here. The ring has cleared and suddenly, "The Fight Song" by Marilyn Manson begins to blare throughout the arena. And out from behind the curtain comes none other than the NEWF Heavyweight Champion Jack Daniels, followed by Michael Draven, Bazooka Joe and Evan Douglas. The whole Armageddon crew is out and makes their way to the ring. The crowd is buzzing because they know history is about to be made right here tonight. So why don't we turn it over to Armageddon here and let them do what they do best...Daniels grabs a mic and begins speaking...)

Jack Daniels: Last week, The Dirty Fuckin' Retards pulleda fast one on Aramgeddon and the entire rasslin' world when they had "The Extreme Bitch" Venom side with them. From that moment on, everyone and thier momma immediately thought that Aramgeddon was over. Everyone thought that there would be no way for Armageddon to overcome a five to four odds. But all fuckin' week long, Armageddon sat back and thought just what we could do here to even the playin' field here. And then it hit us like a bat outta hell. Not only do we have your answer right here tonight DFR...but this little surprise here is gonna blow the roof off this motherfucker and will leave DFR as the ones at the disadvatange. Now ya all saw Armageddon makin' their way into the arena with someone by their side, so ya know we went out and recruited someone here to turn things 'round a bit. So the question remains, just who is it? I think it's time the world finds out and we revolutionize the NEWF right this minute. So hit his music...

(Here we goooo....the moment we've all been waiting for. The crowd is literally buzzing at the thought of who it could be. The arena's sound system sparks up to life and...is that Rocky's theme song? You guessed it. What the hell, why is that song playing? Probably just tho throw off those internet wrestling marks who think they got every angle and every surprise covered from their inside sources on the net. And here he comes, still weraing that grey hooded sweatshirt, with the hood covering his head so you can't make out his face. he comes jogging down while throwing lefts and rights, like he's shadow boxing. He finally enters the ringand he continues to shadow box a bit and Daniels gets on the stick again...)

Jack Daniels: Now I bet all ya internet marks out there are scratchin' your heads thinkin' twice 'bout this. Alright people, get your camera ready cuz history is 'bout to be made right here right now. Alright, without further ado, here he is...the newest member to Armageddon...

(Who could it be? Who is it? The crowd is buzzing with anticipation. The hooded mystery man puts his hand on top of the hood on his sweatshirt and holds it there for a moment. Suddenly, in split second, the hooded mystery man pulls his hand back and reveals his face...OH MY GOD!! I DON'T BELIEVE IT! WHERE THE HELL DID HE COME FROM?!?! IT CAN'T BE!! HOLY FUCKING SHIT....IT'S...................

Jack Daniels: Yeah that's right people, it's the greatest rassler of all time...JOE LEMON! And now he's come to the NEWF to help make DFR and everyone else realize that their Armageddon is closer than they think...MUAWAHAHAHAHA!

(The New Armageddon stands int he ring all with their amrs raised in the air. Is the crowd cheering? They are...they're cheering for Lemon and company, I don't believe it. Who would have thought it was Joe Lemon? Listen to the crowd, they're going nuts...WHAT THE FUCK? Scratch that, the crowd isn't going nuts anymore, instead they are booing the shit out of Armageddon. Why is that ya ask? Cuz Armageddon just attacked Joe Lemon. What the hell is going on? One minute they say he's the newest addition, and the next they are beating the shit out of him. Maybe this is some sort of initiation. Bazooka, Draven and Douglas are putting the boots to poor old Lemon as Daniels gets on the mic again...)

Jack Daniels: Ya sorry ass motherfuckers. That's exactly what all ya bastards are here in Rhode Island (major crowd heat). Ya really thought we were gonna let some sorry ass bitch like Joe Lemon, who has more losses than the number of days Hailey has been in jail, join an elite group like Aramgeddon? Not by afuckin' longshot. Ya see DFR, fact of the matter is that we don't need a fifth memebr in Armageddon to take ya motherfuckers out. Ya think we're scared now cuz ya added the "Extreme Bitch Ass, Ham 'N Eggin' Sorry Motherfucker" Venom to your little faction? Uh-uh, no fear here. Ya see, it doesn't matter how many people ya gather up DFR. Hell, ya can take every single one of these sorry ass people sittin' in this arena right now, and it still won't make a fuckin' difference in the world. Ya wanna talk 'bout swerves, well here's the swerve of the century jackasses. Tip of advice DFR, don't try and go one up on us, cuz no matter what ya do or try, no matter who ya have representin' ya, in the end...ya motherfuckers will just get outdone in every which way fuckin' possible. Don't say I didn't warn ya. Oh and Mr. Best, yeah can ya take your attention away from Kanyon suckin' your dick for just one single solitary second? Thanks. Here's a little present for ya...ya can have Joe Lemon. Hell, throw him in DFR's way, they can use the practice and then when they're ready, ya can toss 'em this way so we can completely fuck 'em up once and for all. Till then...MOTHERFUCKERS!

*************************************************

JD's speaking part of the group promo...

Jack Daniels: Now Jack Daniels warned ya bastards, didn't he? But don't feel too bad 'bout it cuz there was nuttin' ya motherfuckers could do to see the swerve of the fuckin' century comin'. Instead it slapped ya in the face and knocked ya the fuck out. Let me ask ya somethin' DFR...how does it feel to be out-played at your own game? Not too good now does it? Well get used to it motherfuckers, cuz this is just the beginnin' of Armageddon's complete dominance over ya and the rest of the NEWF. Dave Kramer just capped off what is the greatest ensemble of men to ever grace a rasslin' ring. And together we will completely destroy whomever and whatever gets in our fuckin' way. DFR, ya say we have nuttin' in common...we have nuttin' that brings us together? Well ya see, that's where ya wrong, cuz we do have one thing in common, one simple thing that brings us five men together. And that's the complete destruction and dismemberment of Dark Force Risin'. Ya wanna test us, then step on up bitches. And if ya don't, well it doesn't matter now does it cuz either which way ya look at it, we are gonna find ya and show ya just why Armageddon AIN'T TO BE FUCKED WITH!