We come back from commercial and standing in the ring are the 4 competitors. Jack Daniels, Haywood Jublome, and also the two ladies. Can you call Electra and Lisa 'competitors', though? They're not trained in the art of wrestling so I'd perfer referring to them as tremendous ASSets to the CWA and leave it at that.

Speaking of ASSets, do you see what Electra and Lisa are wearing?!?! Electra is flaunting a dazzling electric purple mini-skirt with a matching blouse, while the nubian sista -- Lisa is shaking that ass in a blazing hot red dress. Both Electra's mini-skirt and Lisa's red dress are extremely short in length. In fact, you'd swear that they were wearing nothing underneath their garments. That could very well be the case. All eyes are on the ladies as the temperature in the CWA Center has just risen to an all-time new height. Electra and Lisa strut around the ring -- showing off their amazing bodies and enjoying the fact that all the men are fawning over them. Meanwhile, Jack Daniels and Haywood Jublome are exchanging guillotine stares at one another. You can just see the animosity between them. This match is going to be brutal and that my friends is an understatement. We've got Electra standing next to her man on one side of the ring -- and on the other -- Lisa is chillin' beside Haywood Jublome. 2 couples and I highly doubt we'll see any orgies between these 4 people any time soon, because there's no denying the hatred that Haywood Jublome/Lisa and Jack Daniels/Electra have for one another. And with that being said, the bell signifying the beginning of the match rings. DING. DING. DING. Oh sh*t, here we go!

Lisa and Electra immediately rush towards one another and grab each other by the hair. CAT FIGHT! CAT FIGHT! The CWA fans are in a cheering frenzy and going absolutely ballistic. While, Lisa and Electra go at it, Haywood Jublome and Jack Daniels are jawing at one another in the center of the ring. God damn, Daniels and Jublome are talking a heap of sh*t at one another. If you thought those old Reggie Miller/John Starks trash talking sessions were vicious, you ain't seen nothing yet. This is heated! While, Daniels and Jublome are up in one another's face -- Lisa and Electra wrestle one another down to the canvas and they're rolling around. The male contingent in attendance go buck wild and scream at the top of their lungs. Lisa's on top of Electra. Wait, now Electra is on top of Lisa! They're scratching and clawing at one another. Electra's mini-skirt is riding up on her, and the same is occuring to Lisa with her red dress, which reveals their white and blue thongs respectively. By now all the rowdy CWA fans in the front row have fainted from being overwhelmed at the show Electra and Lisa are putting on.

Whoa...whoa...I know it's tough to take your eyes off of Lisa and Electra but look what's happening in the middle of the squared circle. Jack Daniels never discarded his No. 7 Jack Daniels bottle and now he's preparing to use it on Haywood Jublome. I suppose Jack Daniels has heard enough of Haywood Jublome's trash talking. Jack Daniels is going to put a stop to it -- here and now! Jack Daniels swings the No. 7 Jack Daniels bottle at Haywood Jublome but Haywood grabs Jack Daniels' right arm in mid-flight. Haywood Jublome has thrawted Jack Daniels' efforts of cracking Jublome's head open with the No. 7 bottle. Haywood Jublome follows this defensive move up with a stern kick to Daniels' abdomen area. When Daniels doubles over -- Haywood pounces on him and catches him quickly with a swinging neckbreaker. Jack Daniels crumbles to the canvas and Haywood stays on him like white on rice.

We're given a split-screen of the action as Lisa and Electra continue to roll around on the canvas -- tearing at each other's clothes and revealing their thong underwear much to the delight of every man with a heart beat in the arena and watching this on television. Hold on. Wait a minute! What the hell is Haywood Jublome doing?!?! Haywood has just placed the No. 7 Jack Daniels' bottle over Jack Daniels' face. No way! He can't do this! C'mon Jack Daniels -- get up! Don't let this happen! With the alcohol bottle leaned up against Daniels' face -- Haywood Jublome stomps on the glass bottle. Oh My God!

Glass shatters to the left. Glass shatters to the right. Glass shatters everywhere! I can't believe Haywood Jublome did it! Jack Daniels is holding his face in agonizing pain. Daniels rolls out of the ring until falling out it and down onto the hard concrete surrounding the ring. Daniels is screaming in pain. Wouldn't you be? He just had a glass bottle loaded with alcohol smashed and broken directly onto his face. God, that was just vicious! Haywood Jublome turns and looks at the two women who are still brawling with one another on the mat. Haywood Jublome just shakes his head and slowly stalks towards where the fallen Jack Daniels dwells.

Haywood Jublome should have noticed the trouble that Lisa was in and gave her some assistance but instead he turned his back and went after Jack Daniels. Electra is now positioned on top of Lisa and she's banging her head against the canvas. What's she doing now??? Yes! You go girl! Electra is stripping Lisa! Whistles -- hootering and hollaring can be heard emanating from the fans in attendance. Electra has just ripped Lisa's red dress right from off of her -- revealing the bra and thong panties she had underneath it. Lisa is now laying in the squared circle, practically naked! Electra has Lisa's red dress in her grasp and she's holding it high above her head as some sort of trophy she won in combat. This allows Lisa the opportunity to recover. She low blows Electra and flings her down onto the mat. Lisa straddles Electra and is now stripping Electra of her clothes! I guess it's only fair. Do onto others what they do onto you. Whoops, there goes Electra's blouse. Ripped from right off of her fine athletic and sexy body. And damn did you see that? There goes her mini-skirt as well! Lisa means business! And now Electra has been stripped down to her white bra and thong panties. Once again, Lisa and Electra begin to roll around on the canvas -- scratching and clawing at one another while the cameras turn their attention back to Jack Daniels and Haywood Jublome.

On the outside, Haywood Jublome is hovering over a semi-unconscious Jack Daniels. Daniels is laying face down on the concrete. We can only imagine what his face must look like right about now. Jublome is tauntingly kicking and prodding at Jack Daniels. He's toying with him, as Jublome is enjoying the power advantage he has over Jack Daniels right now. Jublome leans down and scrapes Jack Daniels from off of the ground. EWWWWW. Do you see that??? Jack Daniels' face is totally unrecognizable due to the blood and alcohol which is smeared all over it. I think CWA censors may have to be used here. Jack Daniels is wearing a crimson mask and it's straight up hideous. These two are prepared to fight to the death now, there's no telling what will happen at High Stakes! Jublome leans Jack Daniels against the ringpost and begins to b*tch slap him. Once. Twice. Three times. Is Haywood Jublome crazy??? Jack Daniels may be injured but why incite the man?? Just pin him and be done with it. Haywood Jublome leaves Jack Daniels leaned up against the ringpost and in a bloody mess. Haywood backs off and then begins to charge towards Jack Daniels in a spearing motion. Well, this is the end of Jack Daniels. It was nice knowing him. Holy sh*t! At the very last second, Daniels manages to grab ahold of a nearby cameraman -- and throw him as bait to Haywood Jublome. Daniels meanwhile side-steps out of the way, and Jublome collides with the cameraman -- spearing the poor slob viciously against the ringpost. Well, we have ourselves a dead cameraman. Upon impact, the cameraman's camera goes flying. Jack Daniels snatches it and now has the object in his possession. After laying out the cameraman -- Haywood Jublome looks up only to be nailed with the camera to his face!

Jublome falls like a ton of bricks to the ground. Daniels needing time to rest and recooperate -- backs away from the scene -- hops over the guardrail and enters the crowd. Jack Daniels is in the crowd! What's he doing there???

While Jublome lays on the outside -- vibrating in pain on the outside -- inside the ring -- the ladies continue to fight! Both Lisa and Electra are now in a prone position. Both are standing on their feet and grabbing at each other. All the men really care about, is how Lisa and Electra are bouncing around the ring. And I do mean bouncing. Do you see the breasts on these women??? I rest my case. Then -- in a moment that we'll never forget -- Electra reaches behind Lisa and is able to hook her fingers around the clasp holding her blue bra up. Electra unhooks it! She undoes Lisa's bra and SWOOOOSHHHH there it goes! Lisa tries to cover up but it's to no avail. Everyone has seen her breasts but this isn't even all of it. Electra shoves Lisa down but as she's falling -- Lisa is able to lock her hands around the elastic of Electra's thong panties. In one motion, Lisa pulls down hard and OH MY LORD! Electra's thong panties have been taken off of her. Lisa throws Electra down to the canvas with her. Both Lisa and Electra are trying to cover themselves up as CWA personnel and security enter the ring -- with coats to cover the ladies with. The fans have seen what they've come for and so much more but obviously boo when Lisa and Electra are covered up and escorted out of the ring. Well, that was awesome but now we're down to only Haywoood Jublome and Jack Daniels. The ladies have obviously eliminated themselves in a way that you'll never hear me or any man complain about. That's for sure!

With Electra and Lisa out of the way, we can now center on Jack Daniels and Haywood Jublome. Speaking of Daniels and Jublome, where the hell are they??? Someone get a camera on them! With all this stripper's delight hoopla inside the ring, we ALL have lost track on the true competitors in this bout! Jack Daniels and Haywood Jublome. The CWA camera crew work franctically to find what are most definitely 2 of the CWA's best athletes. Look in the stands! It's a bird! It's a plane! No, It's Haywood Jublome and he's closing the distance between Daniels and himself. A close-up of Haywood's face shows that he too has been busted open, courtesy of that camera shot he took. That was a nasty one too. With blood dripping down the sides of his face, Haywood stalks after Jack Daniels. Daniels is standing on top of a section of steps which he has ascended and he's looking down at Haywood Jublome. Daniels is calling Haywood up there for combat. Haywood not being one to ever back down from a confrontation, power-walks up the steps towards Jack Daniels while the CWA fans form a circle around Haywood Jublome and flock behind him. They follow Haywood as he storms after Haywood Jublome. CWA fans are also surrounding Jack Daniels -- calling out and trying to get on camera. I hope CWA security are being paid well because we're about to have a ruckus on our hands. Once Haywood reaches the pinnacle of his ascent, Daniels and Jublome begin to unload on one another. Haywood takes the advantage and plans to snap mare suplex -- Daniels up -- over and down the stairs. If this works, Daniels will be tumbling downward for days. Haywood cinches it in and is about to nail it -- when suddenly Jack Daniels counters by blocking it with his leg. Daniels is able to get his right leg inside Haywood's and thus stop the propelling motion. Instead, Daniels picks Haywood up -- holds him in a verticle suplex position -- and drapes him over the guardrail of the section above them. Haywood's sternum is resting on this guarail with his legs dangling over the edge and his upper body entrenched in the seats of the section above Jack Daniels. Daniels goes after Haywood. Climbs the 10 steps or so to get to the new section -- and works his way over to where he has hung Haywood Jublome out to dry. When Daniels gets over to Haywood Jublome -- he quickly peepers him with rights and lefts. Below them is a 8 foot drop or so, for they are in the first row of a section located in the upper deck region. Jack Daniels picks Haywood Jublome up and places him into a Crucifix Powerbomb position. OH SH*T! HOLY F*CK! Jack Daniels has Haywood Jublome high above in the air and with one simple motion, Haywood Jublome's career could be over. You've seen someone down South nail this move a million times. Now Daniels just needs to nail it once and Haywood will fly like an eagle and probably break his neck upon the impact of his fall. Everyone huddles around the scene, as the security guards do their best to steer them clear of Jack Daniels and Haywood Jublome. Will Jack Daniels nail the move? The fans think he will!

Jack Daniels runs forward and prepares to propel Haywood Jublome to his death so to speak but at the last second -- Haywood Jublome slides out of the Crucifix Powerbomb. How did he do that? Goodness gracious. Daniels can't believe it! He turns around -- Daniels is near the ledge though -- he turns around -- and OH NO! MY EYES MUST BE DECEIVING ME! Haywood Jublome has just shoved Jack Daniels and now Daniels is wobbling at the ledge -- ready to tumble over the guardrail. Don't do it, Haywood. You son of a b*tch! Haywood stalks right to Daniels and shoves him again! Up and over goes -- Jack Daniels!

Um, someone call Damien Moore. We need a Eulogy to be read here. The fans, obviously in support of Jack Daniels, boo Haywood Jublome as he arrogantly walks down the steps and over to where Jack Daniels lays persumably dead or close to it. Haywood Jublome could end it right here but for some reason he's looking to make a statement. Haywood drags the unconscious Jack Daniels to his feet and puts a headlock onto him. Jublome is dragging him somewhere but where??? The duo heads towards a tunnel corridor which connects the arena itself with the outside perimeter area where concession stands and bathrooms are located. Once at this corridor, Haywood releases the headlock -- and tosses Daniels down the corridor. It's on a downward slope, so Daniels tumbles all the way down to the end of it. Haywood takes his time getting to Jack Daniels. He's awfully confident of himself, isn't he? The camera focuses on Jack Daniels and there's very minimal signs of life. I mean the guy just took a 8 foot drop onto concrete so I can understand why. There was no tables or padding to break the fall. Once Haywood reaches Daniels he picks him back up and punches him back down. The fans once again gather around these 2 warriors. Haywood Jublome continues to beat on Daniels until they reach a concession stand. A mischievious grin crosses Haywood's face as he prepares his next move. Haywood once again drags Daniels to his feet and prepares to lariat him into the concession stand. Ok, here we go. I wish Haywood just stop this sh*t already, It's obvious Daniels is dead and has nothing left in him. Or is it??? Haywood lariats but it's REVERSED and Haywood is sent crashing into the concession stand but better yet Haywood's head goes crashing right through the popcorn making machine. Do you know what that means???

Haywood Jublome has been electrocuted! Would you look at the lights in this place, they have just flickered on, off, and back on again. Wicked! Just F'N wicked! Needless to say, both Jack Daniels and Haywood Jublome are down and out. Amazingly, Jack Daniels is able to work his way to his feet before the referee can reach that pivotal 10 count. Jack Daniels is stumbling around and barely on his feet. After a minute of regaining his senses, Jack Daniels approaches Haywood Jublome. Daniels picks up Haywood Jublome -- and hits him with rights and lefts while taking him towards the women's bathroom!?!?! Is this all Jack Daniels thinks about? Women and booze? Daniels successfully drags Haywood Jublome to the women's bathroom. Haywood is still totally out of it. Once they are inside the women's bathroom -- we hear several feminine voices scream and run out of the bathroom -- running for their life and feeling violated. Daniels takes Haywood over to a bathroom stall. What the hell is he planning??? Jack Daniels opens the bathroom stall and due to the camera view -- we can see feet -- so someone is occupying that bathroom stall. Daniels opens the door to the bathroom stall and shudders. What does he see? The cameras won't allow us to see this! Daniels looks at Haywood whom is in his grasp and says the following to him.

'The Drunken Bastard' Jack Daniels: You want some poon-tang pie? Go get her, boy!

Daniels throws Haywood at presumably a woman in the bathroom stall. This is confirmed when we hear a shrieking scream followed by an obese woman running out of the bathroom stall -- while pulling up her wide load jeans and franctically leaving the area. Haha, Jack Daniels almost forced Haywood Jublome to have her special made Poon-tang pie! If that had happened, Haywood would have puked for days! Daniels once again grabs Haywood Jublome and tosses him across the bathroom -- at a sink. Haywood's back smashes hard against the sink. Daniels picks Haywood up again and throws him out of the bathroom. By now, half the arena have converged to this area and everyone is watching what has to be one of the best fights ever. Both men are bleeding profusely and right now one appears to be out of it courtesy of being electrocuted. Jack Daniels flings Haywood Jublome against the wall -- at a high velocity. It must have woke Haywood Jublome up because out of nowhere he comes back to life and just snaps. Haywood gets a second wind and begins to unload on Jack Daniels. Daniels is shocked by this and isn't ready for Haywood Jublome's onslaught. Haywood Jublome over-powers Jack Daniels and nails him with a brainbuster. OUCH. Daniels' head meets concrete and puts him to sleep. Haywood falls down as well due to using all of his remaining energy to complete that move. However, Haywood is able to answer the 10 count and stop it by putting the boots to Daniels. Haywood irish whips Daniels against the wall. And does it one more time. Haywood Jublome stops for a much needed break and what's this?

Haywood Jublome is drinking from a water fountain? What does he think? That he's Popeye or sumptin'? Instead of spinach -- water will give him power? You better drink a year's supply of Evian water if you want to keep Jack Daniels down. My word of advice to you! Anyways, back to the action. Haywood looks at the fountain and then looks at Jack Daniels and something hits him. He picks up Jack Daniels -- and forces his mouth into the water fountain. But not only that, Haywood chastises him as well.

Haywood Jublome: There's a reason why I always drink Evian water. It's because I'm a fitness guru and now you will learn my ways. It's time to clean out your system. We're gonna sober you up, b*tch, if it's the last thing I ever do! Now drink the water, sucka.

We watch as the water builds in Daniels' mouth. The horror of drinking water -- revitalizes Jack Daniels. With a mouthful of water, Daniels comes back to life and spews the water in his mouth -- all over Haywood Jublome. Daniels and Jublome once again exchange blows. Beating the ever living hell out of one another. BOOM! Both men have just nailed themselves against the doors leading to the outside of the CWA Center.

THEY'RE ON THE STREETS OF LAS VEGAS! OH MY GOD IS THAT KG PANHANDLING?

Nah, it can't be. Somebody call that brotha up or file a missing person's report, though. What's pro-wrestling without KG!?!? Anyways, Jack Daniels and Haywood Jublome have now took their fight onto Las Vegas Boulevard. The Las Vegas citizens are befuddled by the action appearing before them and it's a ruckus as fans trip over themselves to exit the arena and watch this momentous encounter. Daniels has just irish whipped Jublome against a parked car and he has flipped onto the hood. Now Daniels has climbed onto the hood and the two men are battle on top of the car hood. Everyone is going wild -- watching this. HOLY SH*T! Jack Daniels has just gained an advantage over Haywood Jublome and he has powerbombed him from off the hood of the car -- out onto the street. This one has to be over! Haywood Jublome is laying dead in the middle of the street and now Jack Daniels is stalking after him. Jack Daniels is ready to make a cover. Where's the referee? Ah, there he is -- fighting his way through the masses which has converged to watch this spectacle. Daniels covers Haywood Jublome. The referee is just about to drop down and count when....

What is that??? It's a car coming from the CWA Center Garage -- and it's picking up speed -- thus the sound of screeching tires. The camera zooms in on it and we see that it's a Black 2000 Pontiac Bonneville SSEi Coupe. Who the heck is driving that?? Jack Daniels picks his head up and we see a look of horror on his face -- as the headlights shine bright on him and are followed with --

Jack Daniels tried to shield himself with Haywood Jublome -- however both men are nailed by the car and sent flying. Oh My God. Someone get an ambulance! We need an ambulance and medical assistance damnit! Someone has just runned down Jack Daniels and Haywood Jublome. Who the f*ck can it be and how will these two be able to wrestle at High Stakes??? What happens to the #1 contender's match at the Supercard??? But more importantly -- are these two men alright??? Are they still breathing??? This is crazy! Who would do this???

As the car speeds off -- the camera is able for a slight second to capture the license plate # which reads: UEchelon