I' ve been to America but I've never been to me

i don't have anything to say, I just wanted this to get to 100, rare for a thread that starts with bobbins' guts

hahahaha! Rose Petal, 40 percent's very own seedy lap dancer!

Oooooh. Stop it JR.

She's got some pelvis action, she has.

hehehehe

what? you were Rose Petal? I shagged you ten years ago then

the very very best
what else?

were you any good?

in a past life, I was a Balinese dancing girl

a nipple on your back! how odd

I've got one of those on my back snapper.

Sorry. Supposed to making things up. Scrub that.

I HAVEN'T GOT A THIRD NIPPLE ON MY BACK.

ah Scaramanga!

I have a third (though a very small one) nipple (whahey!) - which is strange but true... My girlfriend finds it kinda sexy though

Right so these are just made up then?

Right I just made this up.

I fancy tankgirl!

hehehehehehe!

I PULLED MYSELF LAST NIGHT AND WOKE UP NEXT TO MYSELF.

GETTING HITCHED SATURDAY.

I THINK I'M IN LOVE

I'm the only person I really fancy!

be proud tree - i'm thinking of going for a waz on the strength of it

hey, I've got a nice arse!

yes, but was he doing with his other hand?

tree=ladyboy!

sorry!

Not killed it, just concluded it. There's a difference.

He's singlehandedly killed the thread.

I was gonna say soething, but I can't top Tree, so I won't bother.

Come on, its no big thing, who's never done that here?

tree - first pints on me if we ever bump into each other. HAHAHAHAHAHA

Ha ha ha! That's hilarious.

I'm just too honest for this site.

Well put it away again, you're scaring people off.

I needed to get it out

hehehehehehehe

HAHAHAHA

actually it was true ;-)

heheheeh - I've joined in

hahaha STILL F*CKING PISHING MY DRAWERS

hjhehehehe i'm still laughing at that

hehehehe

there's no WAY you just made that up...

strewth

They've got to be ones you made up tree...

I look at my arse in the mirror, and I pull my pants up tight and pretend its a womans bum and I wank myself off

my dad did the car jump stunt in live and let die

soz

I know where you all live!

at least try to keep the made up bits believable, Satch

This is gettin fookin stupid

I'm funny

That explains the mess on your sofa Clovis

I new to this site!

I have to use that because my real photo makes the Customs guys too excited.
This is what I really look like.

any ditinguishing features?

"yes I have a third nipple"

My nan owns Heathrow airport

hahahahaha

This is my passport photo.

that explains the mess in your sofa.

My skin's on the inside.

sorry dad

weird cross threading occuring!! RUN!!!

what is?

That's disgusting, TG

hehehehe

stevie - behave

i'm a wee tiny midget

no, you're a comic book reading geek.

I am the Norse god of Thunder, Master of the storm and lightning, heir to the throne of legendary Asgard, and the mightiest warrior of all comicdom! Wielding the enchanted Uru war hammer, Mjolnir, I am the protectorate of Midgard. I aman immortal god amongst mortal men. I am THE MIGHTY THOR!

boom tish! hehehehe

Mr Bobbins Double-Barrelled.

It doesn't go, you were right to change it.

I am the Deed Troll.

I was killed when I got shot in the heed.

I am deed poll and I never changed your name for you.

my surname used to be double barrelled but I got it changed by deed poll

Are you on the right thread Satch? Shouldn't you be on the movie quotes thread?

You were only 'sposed to blow the bloody doors off.

this is it

That'll be the quiver of quims perhaps?

Ooh, will we be hearing the patter of tiny fannies?

Nice one bobbs. Was that supposed to be batter stevie?

I have a superfluous third person on my back, who has written 32 orchestral symphonies in H Minor, and coughs whenever I peel plums or tomatoes.

700m ya daft bastard

2 min 7.68 sec

fanny patter

what is it then?

I hold the world 700m record

Really Clov? cos my brother does his pedals for him cos Schumacher's only got stumpy legs and can't reach.

I have a 32f bust.

I'm Emu

Brittney alright tho?

I'm Michael Schuhmachers stuntman. He does all the standard driving stuff, but I stand in and do all his crashes for him.

Don't throw, bloody spears, at me.

For my part-time night job, I make vacuums for double-glazing units out of old newspapers, teabags and squirrels' tears.

And not a lot of people know that

I've just rogered meself with a champagne bottle - I do it every day at 1.30pm - ever since those bastards at the BBC took me Gameshow off me.

I'm really interesting and have LOTS of friends.
It is true. Honest.

No, really, it is true.

This is me wallowing in my own crapulence

hehehe

This is my home page

My name is Michael Caine

i've murdered someone and its ruining my life. Anyone think i should hand myself in? It was only a vargrant, he won't be missed..........

I live in walnut outside Basingstoke and shop for Ladas with a platinum Amex

my dad designed the Thames barrier

I made it all up. Actually I'm a 55 year old housewife living over a fish n chip shop in Walsall.

not sure I can see the point in this one

I have a strange and rare bowel disorder that means I have had the squits all my life