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Trouble in Store for Mr Claus By Nicholas Wapshott Dear Sir, I regret to inform you that we have not chosen you to fill the position of Santa in our Toy Department Christmas Grotto. With thanks for your interest.
pp Deidre Dowdy, Personnel Assistant,
Dear Mr Pamsbottom, Thank you for your letter of 13th inst. May I assure you that we are as sorry as you are that we are only able to employ one Santa Claus. Thank you for your kind offer to stand in at short notice if our Santa does not come up to standard. We are not expecting such an eventuality, but thank you for your continued interest.
pp Deidre Dowdy, Personnel Assistant,
Dear Mr Ramsbottom, Thank you for your letter dated the 19th. May I apologize at once for the misspelling of your surname in the letter from my assistant, Miss Dowdy. I can understand how embarrassing the error must have been, especially as your wife's name is Pamela.
Robert Leech, Personnel Manager,
Dear Mr Ramsbottom, Thank you for your further letter. May I say right away that I very much resent the implication that we rejected your application to become a member of our casual staff this Christmas because of racial prejudice. I had no knowledge that your mother's uncle was partly Jewish, nor would it have made any difference to our decision. Nor was your speech impediment considered to be important. As we did not call you for interview, this would hardly have been apparent.
R. Leech, Personnel Manager,
Dear Mr Ramsbottom, Thank you for your letter including the many references from former employers, which are returned to you now, with compliments. The tone of their comment must prove some solace that we were not able to find a place for you in the Toy Department. The letter from the President of the West Ham Scottish Dancing Club gave particular enjoyment here. I did not know of your two parking fines and can assure you that these would not taint our judgment either way in recruitment situations. The fact is that we have appointed another person to the job to which you aspired and, as far as this company is concerned, that is an end to the matter.
pp R. Leech, Personnel Manager,
Dear Mr Ramsbottom, I cannot take seriously your complaints made against the member of our staff acting as Santa in our Christmas Grotto. The adjectives "short-tempered ", "snappy", "impatient" and "aggressive", which you use, do not accord with our knowledge of the man in question. May I remind you that the Grotto is intended for children only and that your visits to the Toy Department are now becoming an embarrassment here.
Robert Leech, Personnel Manager,
Dear Mr Ramsbottom, Thank you for drawing to my attention the behaviour of the Santa in our Toys Department. If, as you say, the man was drunk, rude, and using foul language, there can be no excuse. I shall make immediate enquiries and thank you again for bringing this sorry state of affairs to my notice.
H. J. Barrington-Cox, General Manager,
Dear Mr Ramsbottom, The allegations which you made recently to our general manager, Mr Barrington-Cox, have proved to be unfounded. May I say that this came as no surprise to this department. We would be delighted if you would stop your irrational vendetta against this company.
R. Leech, Personnel Manager
Dear Mr Ramsbottom, I am very sorry to hear that you and your wife, will no longer be customers at Grimsly and Harbinger. A little bit of me dies when I hear that old customers have been ill-treated. I am most saddened to hear your reasons and I promise you that I will be making every effort to get to the root of your complaint.
T. W. I. Trumpington,
Dear Sir I regret to inform you that we have not chosen you to fill the position of Demonstrator in our Do-It-Yourself Department during our Easter Event. With thanks for your interest.
pp Gladys SnubwinkIe,
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