You knew them, you loved them, you winced when you heard how they died. Here's a little trip down memory lane for ya'. Missing someone? E-mail me and let me know...
John Banner
The rotund actor won everyone's heart as that nutty,
yet loveable, Nazi, Sgt. Schultz on everyone's favorite concentration camp
comedy, "Hogan's Heroes." Who can forget his comedic presence, his steely
glare, and his enduring catchphrase "I know No-THING!"
Manner of Hideous Death: Banner died of an abdominal
hemorrhage ... on his BIRTHDAY no less ... in 1973.
Bob Crane
Banner's buddy on the "Hogan's Heroes" enjoyed tremendous status as
the slick, intelligent and witty Ohio native, Col. Hogan. Kids wanted to
grow up to be like him, and women would even sleep with his creepy buddy
in sick three-ways in order to be seen with him. With the resurrection
of his show on European TV and domestically on Nick at Nite's TVLand, he's
as popular as ever.
Manner of Hideous Death: He was clubbed to death in June of
1978, a crime that is officially unsolved. His creepy buddy who ran the
camera while he cavorted with women was charged, but never found guilty.
Bummer.
Chris Farley
Known as "That Fat Guy" on Saturday Night Live, Farley parlayed his
one-trick act into several successful movies, and had aspirations to branch
out into drama. He'll always be best known, however, for his meek,
vulnerable spins on loud, obnoxious characters. He followed in the footsteps
of his idol, John Belushi, all the way to the grave.
Manner of Hideous Death: Just like Belushi, Farley died of a
drug overdose at the age of 33. He was found in his pajama bottoms in a
pool of his own vomit just inside the door of his Chicago condominium.
Yuck.
Jon-Erik Hexum
Hexum is remembered by literally dozens of people as the dumb guy on
NBC's ill-fated 80's adventure series "Voyagers." In addition to that work,
he was featured on the pages of "Playgirl" magazine, as well as another
80's adventure series, "Cover-Up." He also pioneered the use of double
first names, which would in the 90's become the norm for an entire generation
of annoying child actors.
Manner of Hideous Death: In one of the dumbest deaths ever recorded,
Hexum put a gun filled with blanks up to his temple and pulled the trigger
during a break in filming of "Cover-Up." Hey, just cuz it's hideous doesn't
mean it can't be kinda funny.
Brian Keith & Anissa Jones
Keith, a longtime character actor, was known to a generation Americans
as "Family Affair's" down-to-earth "Uncle Bill," while Anissa's considerably
more-abridged career mainly featured playing "Buffy" in that same series.
They provided wholesome family viewing for years and years, preserved in
present-day reruns.
Manner of Hideous Death(s): Keith died of a self-inflicted gunshot
wound in 1997, effectively ending a protracted battle with cancer. Jones
didn't even make it out of the 70's, dying of a publicized drug overdose
in 1976.
Mr. Ed
In one of the more sleazy episodes of Hollywood history, studio executives
paraded another horse around as the authentic "Mr. Ed" for years after
the show was nothing but a pleasant memory to millions of adoring fans.
Small wonder ... what captures a flight of whimsy quite as much as a talking
horse? And the show's jingly-jangly theme song has kept many a person awake
all night ... praying for death.
Manner of Hideous Death: The REAL Mr. Ed was put to sleep in
1968, just two years after the show's cancelation. Studio executives claimed
the horse was suffering from numerous maladies, including a broken leg.
Euthanasia? Or bitter payback for a failed series? YOU be the judge.
Rocket J. Squirrel
As one half of the most famous comedy duo in television history, "Rocky"
brought joy and laughs to generations of American children. His understated
brilliance came in the way he played a dubious straightman to partner Bullwinkle's
semi-retarded antics. A troubled genius, he found himself typecasted, and
was unable to explore the different areas of his talents. Doubts about
his sexuality plagued him, and when he and Bullwinkle had their highly-publicized
falling out in late 1974, it was about over for him. A one-squirrel play
bombed in New York, and he stooped to writing a tell-all book, "BullSh**:
My Life with a Moose" in 1976, which cannonballed a planned reunion.
Manner of Hideous Death: Squirrel's lifeless body was found
in a New Orleans brothel in November of 1978. Police couldn't determine
how long he'd been there, but autopsies indicated massive amounts of cocaine
in his system. Bullwinkle wept openly at his funeral.