"The Mighty Terrifying Wrath of the Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland"

PART 1 OF A 4 PART SAGA

By Eric Johnson

Long, long ago, in the forgotten vat in the back of Sven and Ole's Swiss-Norwegian Chocolate shop, there was a small chocolate bubble. He lived a quiet and simple life, but yearned for the world beyond his sheltered existence. Little did he know that his wishes would lead to the most terrifying adventure that he had ever had...

One day, as our hero lay in the forgotten vat, puckering in and out of existence, a Great Black One leaped onto the rim of the vat. The rat (what people call the Great Black One) stared at the little chocolate bubble. "Who are you?" he asked. The bubble replied, "I am a young, handsome, brave, cute little chocolate bubble who wants to see the world!"
The Great Black One laughed and said, "Ha, ha, ha... You are courageous. The Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland could use a chocolate bubble like you!" With that, he scooped the chocolate bubble up in a ladel and dashed out the back door.

TO BE CONTINUED IN THE NEXT INSTALLMENT: "The Dark and Wondrous Minions of the Mighty Terrifying Wrath of the Evil Nuget Candy Of Terrorland"
 

"The Dark and Wondrous Minions of the Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland"

PART 2 OF A 4 PART SAGA

By Eric Johnson

P.S. Sorry, I cut out part of the title to make it sound better

The Great Black One raced along the icy plains in Switzerland with a ladel of chocolate on his back. The chocalte bubble was not accustomed to being cold. He longed for his Giant Forgotten Vat in the back of Sven and Ole's Swiss-Norwegian Chocolate shop. It was the only world that the bubble had ever known.

The Great Black One jumped onto a soup bowl that was being pulled by two large Truffels. A King-Size Hershey bar tossed the rat a riding crop. The rat caught it and spurred the Truffels on. "YEEEEHAAAWWWW!!!" Cried the Great Black One (also known as a rat). The Great Black One soon came to a huge white chocolate palace. The Truffells broke through the doors and a pair of Hershey bars (the tough guards for the Evil Nuget Candy) gave chase. The rat stopped the Truffells and the Hershey bars were joined by a legion of chocolate bunnies. They escorted the rat and his ladel (including the bubble) into the throne room. There, an entire army stood before a throne. The army consisted of chocolate bunnies mounted on Truffells, Hershey Bar foot soldiers, and, the most terrifying thing of all, THE EVIL NUGET CANDY OF TERRORLAND!!! The Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland laughed evilly, "BWA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!! This chocolate bubble will do well, but first he must be hardened! Put him in the Horrible Hardening Ovens! BWA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!"

TO BE CONTINUED IN THE NEXT INSTALLMENT: "The Horrible Hardening Ovens of the Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland"
 
 

"The Horrible Hardening Ovens of the Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland"

PART 3 OF A 4 PART SAGA

By Eric Johnson

Eric slowly hobbled over to a hunched form on his desk. Eric's lips were dry and his dentures were clammy. The next day would be his 120th birthday. He would die. I don't like the sound of that. Let's change it. *Ahem*

Eric slowly hobbled over to a hunched form on his desk. Eric's lips were dry and his dentures were clammy. The next day would be his 101st birthday. He would NOT die. A Russian man had told him once that he would live to 120. So THERE! Eric pulled a leatherbound, dust covered book from a shelf in the vast library that was in his and his wive's estate. He limped over to the hunched form. He whipped off the blanket covering the hunched form and found... "WHY IT'S QUASIMODO! THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME!" or maybe not. He started at a still gray void. He could see the glimmer of a small reflection. White encased the void. Long since abandoned peripherals extended from it. These apendages had, in their glorious age, been gateways to other worlds. Eric sat down and pulled his dentures out and into a glass of water with a SHPLMUNCK... SPLASH! sound. He could never write with those darn things in. After 88 years since the last installment, he decided to take up the keys once again... he would type into these portals, the secrets that all eternity had held just of of reach... he would continue the saga... he would finish the story that he had unknowingly started so very, very long ago...

BIIIIUMMMMPAARUMMMPAAAPAARUMMM!!!!!! The Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland's minions pushed the chocolate bubble toward the hardening vats. The bubble struggled, but to no avail. He knew he would be a hardened (get it? HARDENED?!!!) minion of The Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland all too soon. Then, the bubble remembered something... something he had learned from his mother, oh so (or so it seemed) very long ago...

TO BE CONTINUED IN THE NEXT INSTALLMENT: Our Hero's Attempt at Escape From... The Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland... and The Mighty Terrifying Wrath of The Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland
 
 

Our Hero's Attempt at Escape From... The Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland... and The Mighty Terrifying Wrath of The Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland

PART 4 OF A 4 PART SAGA

Years ago, a Rebellion was started, and an Empire was destroyed. Now, you will learn how...

The Bubble was remembering what his mother taught him and he peered into the hardening ovens. The Dragons of Icy Cool Winterfresh Gum Breath swirled around the bottom and breathed their icy breath. He leaped out of his ladel and flew past the guards, the ripples in his chocolatey bubbleness sped him along. His mother had taught him that Winterfresh Gum was dangerous to nuget candy because the mint reacted with the nuget, causing it to lose all of its hardness. The bubble knew that if the Nuget Candy became wobbly, its minions would no longer be under its Mighty Terrifying Wrath. They would realize that they were supposed to be in candy stores and candy baskets and the rat would realize that he wanted to eat the candy. It was a dangerous plan that the bubble was planning, but he had to chance it. He bounced of the wrapper of a truffle, and shot right onto the throne of the Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland. The Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland slipped on the choclate bubble and flew onto the guards, who accidentally crowd-surfed the Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland to his wobbly doom. "Argh! Licorice whips and treacle tarts! My Mighty Terryifying Wrathful ways of Terrorland are ended," shouted the Evil Nuget Candy of Terrorland as he plummeted towards the Dragons of Icy Cool Winterfresh Gum Breath. He hit a plume of Icy Cool Winterfresh Gum Breath and for once in his existence, wobbled. He was so wobbly, he wobbled right out of the Hardening Vat, right out his castle door, right off the coast of Switzerland, into the sea, onto a cruise ship, and into a vending machine. He became a regular piece of candy, and was soon bought by a former CIA agent named David Bobway. As for the rest of the candy, the rat chased them all to the Mr. Bulky's in Bern (the capital of Switzerland). As for the cute, little, chocolate bubble, he flew home to his forgotten chocolate vat in the back of Sven and Ole's Swiss-Norwegian Chocolate shop. It was now the only place on Earth where candy lived a real life. Yes, that's right. All the chocolate bunnies, truffles, Hershey's Bars and Dragons of Icy Cool Winterfresh Gum Breath became regular candy again. But the chocolate bubble lived happily in the warm vat, with his mother, father and 2,197 brothers and sisters.

As Eric finished writing the story that he had started 88 years ago, he paused thoughtfully. He smiled, pulled his dentures out of the glass of water, stood up, and went to the kitchen to get a candy bar.

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THE END

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