Q. What's a buff?
A. A buff is a spell that someone casts on you. It gives you special powers that you wouldn't normally have, but it wears off after a couple of turns (adventures). The number of turns you have left with a buff is displayed beside its name in the character pain. I recommend that everyone be buffed at all times, particularly the mysticality classes who tend get beaten up a lot. The list of the buffs available through clan members can be found here .

Q. Why is this clan so awesome? I mean, what makes you different from every other clan?
A. Our members. We have some truly enthusiastic and helpful members who have volunteered to help other people in the clan. If you have ever thought "I wish I could do X, but I can't because I'm the wrong class" then we pretty much have you covered.

Q. Why are some items in the mall really expensive? I'm never going to be able to afford them...
A. Some items cost a lot because they are really rare, and the greedy little people who own them want you to pay a lot so that they can be rich. Some people do have the millions of meat required to purchase them, but they don't come along every day, so rares tend to sit on the market for a long time. You will be able to afford them eventually, it will just take a while. That's one of the goals of the Richer and Larger clan, to help its members become rich :)

Q. What is the maximum number of adventures a player can get in a day?
A. The maximum number of adventures that you can carry over a roll over is 200. I'd say that normal players should be able to get 155-185 new adventures every day. 50 or so 'free' adventures, 60 from booze, and the rest from food.

Q. What do you mean by 'free' adventures?
A. Every player gets 40 adventures at roll over, +3 for belonging to a clan with a calendar, +1 for the dead guys watch, +3 from the imitation nice watch (the watches don't stack), +1 for the tiny plastic bitchin' meat car (these stack), +4 for the meat maid, +4 for the clockwork maid (post ascension item, stacks with the meat maid),+3 from the pagoda, +3 for a chrome weapon. And I think that's it.

Q. I don't get 60 adventures from booze, what are you drinking?
A. Rockin' wagons. Its a moxie drink, and its about 3 000 meat in the mall. You can drink 5 of them a day with a liver of steal, and they give you about 12 adventures each. All of the special moxie drinks that DrunkFish can make for you give you the same adventure gains, and you can get Zumie to cast you with ode to booze to squeak out a few more adventures. If you can't find Zumie, sneaksie will do it for 1 meat.

Q. But ice-cold beer costs 100 meat!
A. A lot of things cost 100 meat, but that doesn't mean that you should drink it! There are better things out there than ice-cold beer and they don't all cost a lot. The last time I checked, BoozerBear sold cheap extra spicy bloody marries. To find the right booze for you, go to the links page and click on item effects link.

Q. It looks like you are getting a lot of adventures out of your food too...
A. I eat fettucini Inconnu mostly, you can eat 2 a day and they cost 8 000 each. I also have room for an insanely spicy enchanted bean burrito, which is 3 000 meat. All of this for the low low price of 19 000 meat, almost half as much as chow mein. Its pretty much the cheapest way to do the high end food.

Q. Why do you keep quoting prices?
A. Cost/benefit analysis my friend! You should think of your food from the cost per adventure point of view. If the food you are eating is costing you more per adventure than you expect to make back with that adventure than you are actually loosing meat. If you don't have a good idea of how much meat you are making in a day, or where its going, than you can never expect to be rich. This game is a lot like life that way.

Q. Where is the best place to adventure for meat?
A. The best place in terms of pure meat drops from monsters is the icy peak. If you have the right stuff, then you can get 500 or so meat per turn. I got a disco bandit up to 700 meat per turn once upon a time. By right stuff I mean, 25lb leprechaun, empathy buff, 3 tiny plastic hermits, fat loot buff and polka buff. There are other ways to make meat in the kingdom though, and I recommend playing around a little bit (you might loose some meat, but you will gain much knowledge).

Q. Where is the best place to adventure for stats?
A. That depends on where you are in the game. You should always adventure in the toughest place you can, and the bloody faced v-ball and one of the AT buffs should help you out with that. If you are at a super high level, then the hidden temple and the shore will probably be your best bets. Both areas scale with your level, but you will loose meat if you adventure there.

Q. Why does Zumie like oyster eggs so much? I don't get her.
A. She is investing, that's something that smart people do. I'm going to put up a page on investing for the long term in a bit.

Q. Who put this site together? I thought that was KaMaKaZe's job?
A. It is his job, but he seems to have disappeared on us. Zumie put this together, and its only staying up until KaMaKaZe finishes his page.

And this concludes my brain's randomly generated list of fake FAQs. If you have a real question, please ask me (Zumie) either in game or out ( anmbia@hotmail.com ).