The Appointment
Tim Roberts, 1998. This is the only story of my own that I have managed to publish on my website so far. Please email me and let me know what you think! Maybe one day I might write enough to publish a book, along with my poems. You can also read one of my favourite Australian short stories The Loaded Dog or return to my main page. |
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Officer: Do you have a car?
Client: Yes I have a car. But it doesn't work. It was a great car - a Holden HJ but the motor's gone. Officer: Yeah, I had a great car like that... Client: (almost interrupting) I have to do some work on the gear box, and brakes too. Officer: Let's see now, your appointment is for next Tuesday, at 10:30am Client: Yes I know - I also have a problem with my back. Officer: With Margot on the 13th of June. Client: Yes I know... (thoughtful pause) I think they should make Euthanasia legal. You just get to a point when you have had enough of this problem and then that, and I think you should be able to commit Euthanasia. (Client looks at the Officer, who responds by looking at the computer and typing faster, more quietly now.) Officer: Margot will be able to talk to you about looking for a job, what you will need to do... Client: (Interrupting again) You know, I tried to do it recently. Officer: Yes? Client: I hooked up the hose pipe to the exhaust and got in my car, but the car wouldn't start (looks calmly ahead at the worker) Officer: Oh! Well, just come on Tuesday at 10.30 and Margot will help you with all your questions. Client: (A little surprised) Oh! O.K. Well... goodbye! Officer: Yes, there's the door now. Client: You know, I feel better when I take my tablets. Officer: Goodbye. Client: But I forgot
today.
The Social Security officer
continues typing and says nothing. Suddenly the client is gone; seeing
this the officer gets up and goes over to his supervisor.
Officer: Jenny, I, er.. think that was the client you asked me about this morning. Supervisor: (tensely) Which
client? What are you talking about? (going to the reception)
Officer: No - he just walked
out.
Unknown to the officer the
client has just come straight back in during his talk with the supervisor,
and sat down behind a display board where the officers can't see him.
Supervisor: What are you talking about?? Officer: you asked me this morning to look out for a client when he came in, you know... Supervisor: What are you talking about?? What client?!!? Officer: The, the... SCHIZOPHRENIC MAN. (looking up, the officer suddenly sees the client and guesses that he probably has heard everything. The officer looks a little pale). Supervisor: Oh THAT one.
(pointing a bony finger covered in wrinkles in the direction
Client: Hello. Supervisor: Here Mr... (looks at computer screen) Smith... Do you have an appointment? Officer: He's ... I gave him an appointment for Tuesday with Margot. Supervisor: Well that's o.k. then (briskly). Good, you can go now. (Client walks out again). Officer: (to supervisor)
But he was trying to kill himself... with a hosepipe!
THE END |
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