KINSMAN
by Wayne Hand, 1999

Alas, my elusive kinsman you've led me quite a chase
I thought I'd found your courthouse But the Yankees burned the place.

You always kept your bags packed although you had no fame,
and Just for the fun of it Twice you changed your name.

You never owed any man, or At least I found no bills
And In spite of eleven offspring You never left a will.

They say our name's from Europe, came state side on a ship
Either they lost the passenger list Or granddad gave them the slip.

I'm the only one that's looking another searcher I can't find
I play "maybe that's his fathers name" as I go out of my mind.

They said you had a headstone in a shady plot
I've been there twenty times, and Can't even find the lot.

You never wrote a letter your Bible we can't find
It's probably in some attic out of sight and out of mind.

You first married a......Smith and just to set the tone
The other four were Sarahs and everyone a Jones.

You cost me two fortunes one of which I did not have
My wife, my house and Fido, how I miss that yellow lab.

But somewhere you slipped up, Ole Boy, Somewhere you left a track
And If I don't find you this year well..........next year I'll be back.

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Epitaph in a New England Cemetery:

"I told you I was sick, Elizabeth"


 

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