Does anyone know when my 'wild oats' turned to prunes and All Bran?
Want to know how simple my life is lately? The biggest thrill of my day is turning on the computer and finding another name in my guest book! Hint, Hint. (I like email too.)
Attention Hikers, Hunters, and Fishermen
Several Western States have issued an advisory to take extra precautions when hunting, hiking, or fishing, because of the recent number of deaths caused by encounters with Grizzly Bears. Grizzly bears typically avoid humans. Most deadly encounters happen when the bear is surprised by the sudden appearance of humans. Therefore, it is advised to wear noisy bells on your clothing and carry pepper spray in case of an encounter with a bear. You should also be able to recognize the difference between black bear manure and grizzly bear manure. Black bear manure is smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur.
Grizzly bear manure has little bells in it and smells like pepper.
Jesse (The Body) Ventura has managed to stick his foot in his mouth already. Offended the Irish by saying the streets of his fair city might have been designed by a drunken Irishman. Or should that be Irishperson? I am part Irish and failed to be offended any more than I am by the blonde jokes. (Which, by the way, do not offend me at all!) Some people just have no sense of humor!
Hooray!! Someone from Iowa won the Powerball millions. A 21 year old college student with $5.99 in his bank account. But WAIT..there's trouble in River City. Now a 20 year old co-worker has come forth saying that she contributed 50 cents to the purchase of the ticket. Iowa law says you have to be 21 years old to purchase a ticket. If the courts decide she is part owner, then Timothy's riches will turn back to Rags. I think she screwed up big time, or maybe she doesn't like Timothy? Or maybe Timmy didn't want to share.. They could both end up with nothing.
Hello Lottery Officials.....I know someone in northern Iowa who could use that money. I promise to take it, use it, enjoy it, and not cause you any trouble about it!
An issue in Iowa right now is whether or not we should have a hunting season on Mourning Doves. I come from a hunting family, none of whom agree that there is any sport in hunting a song bird who sits under our bird feeders, looks at us with soulful eyes and says coo-ah-coo-coo-coo. Proponents of this bill say the dove has a short life anyway. Somehow that doesn't make any sense to me. Does that mean it's ok to make it shorter yet? They say the dove is a fast flyer and very hard to hit. Hmmmm, that sounds like they want to use them for target practice. How many of these 'hard to hit' birds will just be wounded and die a painful death. There is approximately two ounces of edible meat on a dove, how many will not even be retrieved, cleaned, and eaten? I also wonder why out of state hunting groups are so interested in getting Iowa to pass this hunting bill. Is there a profit to be had here somewhere? Iowa has protected the mourning dove for 80 years...I'm in favor of at least another 80. And that's my thoughts on the subject, thanks for listening.
Feb. 26..The Iowa House announced today that the Dove issue is not going to be put to a vote this year. However, it can be opened again next year. I like to think that just maybe some of my email helped table the bill for now. Only three of Iowa's elected elite bothered to write back to me on the issue. Thank you Betty, Dan, and Mark. You have my vote next time around.
The Clinton/Lewinsky fiasco is finally over.....or is it? The media doesn't seem to be able to let go. I am more concerned about Medicare and Social Security being available when I get ready to retire then I am about the President's zipper problem. Isn't there any other news out there? Please someone MAKE SOME NEWS..!!!
UPDATE: I read that another woman has come forward to say that Willy 'forced' her to have sex 20 years ago. Wonder what the title of her book will be? Looks like a lot of people are going to get rich over this, except for us, the American Public.
And speaking of not letting go: Linda Tripp now says she was acting like Monica's mom!! Not exactly my idea of the 'motherly' type. Sure glad my mom didn't try to trap me by wearing a wire, taping my conversations, and telling all my secrets to Ken Starr. Linda, I don't think you will be a nominee for Mother of the Year.
Monica is now comparing herself to Princess Diana?? In your dreams girl. I don't think so..
Did you watch the interview on Barbara Walters? I didn't. Can't feel sorry for the 'poor little rich girl.'
Why is it that if someone tells you there are a billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you the paint is wet you have to touch it to make sure?
Why isn't eleven (11) pronounced onety one?
Will spring ever arrive? I HATE WINTER!! It's hell on people with arthritis.
I learned a new word at the doctor's office last week.
FIBROMYALGIA aka FM or FMS.
More on this DD (dreaded disease) later. If anyone reading this has FMS I would really like to hear from you.
Until tomorrow, or whenever I think of anything else to put here, I'll be seeing you in the funny papers! (That's what MY mom always used to say) She was better looking than Linda too.
I swear every time I see that woman the thought of bags comes into my head. Up to 4 now and still going! (Oh, slap my mouth, I am so bad)
Always Remember,never forget...... Wear a hat when feeding the sea gulls.