Press to hear Angel
This page has been especially designed for poems I have created for Jenni. Writing these poems releases my feelings and emotions in a way that is healing. People ask me "How do you go on?" You see, I really have no other logical choice but to go on, one day at a time. Maybe my poems and some verses from frequently heard songs will shed some light on my new feelings.
...in the arms of an angel, fly away from here...you are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie, you're in the arms of the angel, may you find some comfort there...Sarah McLachlan
...life is short but sweet for certain...Dave Matthews
...if I could turn back time...if I could find a way...Cher
A Mother's Sorrow
Do you know a mother's sorrow~
When with her child there is no tomorrow
No beautiful smile to light my day~
No guiding hand to show the way
No emerald eyes~
That light the skies
No flowing hair~
For which to care
No loving hugs I can exchange~
Or graduation plans to arrange
No walks with the wind against our face~
No sunny beaches with sand to trace
No chance for that one last "I love you"~
Which in the long run were way too few
Do you know this mother's sorrow?
Of course you do, you are my Compassionate Friends~
Adrift like me, hoping our memories never end
Linda Kelley, Forever Jenni's Mom
...I need a sign to let me know your here...I need to know that things are gonna' look up...I want a reason for the way things have to be...I'm callin' all angels...Train
January...1998
In my dreams I always see you soar above the sky. In my heart there will always be a place for you for all my life. I'll keep a part of you with me, and everywhere I am there you'll be...Faith Hill
I have the sense to recognize that I don't know how to let you go...I know I can't be with you...I do what I have to do...Sarah McLachlan
...God must have spent, a little more time on you...N Sync
Dear Jenni and God
Oh Jenni how I long to hear your voice
But it seems that now I have no choice
All I have is a recording from your telephone
That I listen to when I am alone
Oh and I have the karaoke you and Courtney made
It will help that 4th of July memory not to fade
And your pictures I can't even begin to say
I look through them I swear every day
I keep on saying it's my biggest fear
That I will forget my daughter dear
The tears I cry could create a new ocean
Every single day I struggle with my emotions
The only ones who know my true loss
Are those who carry this same cross
Do you know what I would give to see you once more
To hear your car and you walk through that door
To hold you tight
Or even to fight
I'd give my own life for a child of mine
And I've told God that a thousand times
I'm sorry I just don't think that it's fair
You were only 17-had not had your share
Graduation, college, a true romance
A wedding or children, never the chance
I'm sorry God I just feel so cheated
My life long dreams are now defeated
Please help me God don't let me forget
One thing I'd like sure as the sun will set
You surely know how much this means
Please dear God, let me have Jenni at least in my dreams
My love forever, Mom
This is a post it note Jenni left in my medicine cabinet one morning. I sent one back to her. I am so thankful I kept this. I have carried it many places, including to the graduation ceremony Jenni should have been part of.
...I'm loving angels instead...Robbie Williams
...my heaven is a nice house in the sky...and I'm all right.....Dave Matthews
...you'll be in my heart...I'll be there for you always...just look over your shoulder...Phil Collins
Its Midnight
Its midnight Jenni~and your not home
I sit in the dark and cry alone
Its midnight Jenni~Lindsay's out late
Her safe return I anxiously wait
Its midnight Jenni~Sean stirs in his sleep
His sister JenJen he wanted to keep
Its midnight Jenni~yes your dad he still cries
And looks up for you in the heavenly skies
Its midnight Jenni~two new babes have arrived
As they grow they'll learn of their beautiful cousin who did not survive
Its midnight Jenni~Courtney really needs you
Guide her safely whatever you do
Its midnight Jenni~PJ is done on the field
Keeping your memory alive he will not yield
Its midnight Jenni~we all miss you so
And ask God every day why you had to go
Its midnight Jenni
......is this God's experiment?... Elton John
...I'm so lost for you...Dave Matthews
If You Saw Me
If you saw me walking down the street
you couldn't tell my heart is broken
I try hard to smile at all I greet
Sometimes no words can be spoken
I get up every day and put on my mask
The happy one from years ago
For a smile and to be happy is such a task
A burden I hope you will never know
Since this child of mine has gone away
I'm no longer the person I used to be
I weep for my daughter every day
Do you have any idea what she meant to me
Though these words were not spoken out loud of often
I loved her with my every breath
I am tortured by all of what might have been
Had she never known an early death
With her beauty and zest she surely would catch
A wonderful young man who with all his heart
Would realize he had made a good match
And speak the words "Till death do us part"
I will never know what her future could be
A doctor a lawyer a candelstick maker
Too early she has been taken from me
And these dreams she's taken to heaven with her
And now I go on as best I can
With her smile forever etched in my mind
As I walk the path that she once ran
If you see me there, please be kind
Speak her name, tell me you knew her
Remind me of a memory you two share
If I start to cry which is for sure
At least I will know you still care
And I will wish for you a happy day
Which I know again I will see
In parting I would like to say
We'll all meet again you, Jenni, and me
I Love You Jenni