I do tech support for tv's and vcr's. About once a day I get a call from someone with a reception problem.. First I ask if they are using cable or an antenna, and they tell me that they're not using either. Submitted by Matt N. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 1st Person: "Do you know anything about this fax-machine?" 2nd Person: "A little. What's wrong?" 1st Person: "Well, I sent a fax, and the recipient called back to say all she received was a cover-sheet and a blank page. I tried it again, and the same thing happened." 2nd Person: "How did you load the sheet?" 1st Person: "It's a pretty sensitive memo, and I didn't want anyone else to read it by accident, so I folded it so only the recipient would open it and read it." Submitted by Brad W. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery for this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote 'thingy,'" she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries...it's a long walk." submitted Brad W. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ My friend called his car insurance company to tell them to change his address from Texas to Vermont. The woman who took the call asked where Vermont was. As he tried to explain, she interrupted and said, "Look, I'm not stupid or anything, but what state is it in?" ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Several years ago we had an intern who was none too swift. One day he was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," she told him. With that, the intern took his last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies. submitted by The Boss +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I was working the help desk. One day one of the computer operators called me and asked if anything "bad" would happen if she dropped coins into the openings of her PC. I asked her if this was something she was thinking of doing. She said, "never mind" and hung up. So I got out my trusty tool kit and paid her a visit. I opened her CPU case and sure enough, there was 40 cents. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ This person had a broken lamp which he wanted to discard. Unfortunately, the power cord ran under his refrigerator, making it impossible to move the lamp while the cord was attached. He decided to cut the cord, since the lamp was unusable anyway. He didn't remember to unplug it first. I found him in the hallway rolling back and forth. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I was in a car dealership a while ago when a large motor home was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister." I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the cruise control, then went in back to make a sandwich. submitted by The Boss +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I called a company and asked to speak to Bob. The person who answered said, "Bob is on vacation. Would you like to hold?" ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I rented a movie lately. Before the movie begins a message comes on the screen saying, "This movie has been altered to fit your television screen. "How do they know what size screen I have?" ************************************************************************ Your coming here has been much appreciated. We hope you have enjoyed yourself. If you have or know of similar things email us. If it is original and we use it, you will be given credit. In any case THANKS FOR COMING BY!!
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