Top Ten Lists

...and now, from the home office in Menomonie, Wisconsin...

10) Realizing at the last minute your presentation on the economics of the ancient greeks that is due at your next class was supposed to be about modern fashion concepts.
9) Messages scrawled in blood about somebody knowing where you live and where you sleep.
8) Finding out too late that the cat decided to use your bowl of Cherios as the new litterbox.
7) Getting hit by a city bus, then hit again when the driver realizes he missed the stop you were at.
6) Your roommate keeps muttering something about how much he dislikes authority, government, and the availability of hostages.
5) Prostitute demands triple her fees after two minutes of work.
4) Strip search by police yields nothing but snickers and giggles.
3) Numerous answering machine messages from Satan regarding your "upcoming appointment" and "that deal we made."
2) Sad puppies are looking at you and shaking their heads in pity.

...and the number one sign of a bad day...

1) Warning from your accountant: "Have you ever considered life in another country?"

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