Q: "How many United Methodists does it take to change a light bulb?"
A: "We choose not to make a statement either in favor or against the need for a light bulb. However, If in your own journey, you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb (or light source, or non-dark resource), and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, flourescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence"
CHUCK'S RANT
But seriously... Our Western Springs United Methodist church is involved with B.E.D.S. Boy are we involved. It's funny how things go. When they asked if we could supply space starting Oct 16[1999], we voted YES since basically, if that's something we won't do, then we couldn't call ourselves a Christian organization and mean it.
About 800 BEDS volunteer workers use 7 church halls in the Cook County west suburban area to give homeless people emergency sleeping places and a meal each night during the cold months,Oct-March. Each church does one night a week. They use our fellowship hall on Saturday nights. The outside group that runs it had had no major problems in 12 years. They only accept homeless clients who will cooperate with a bunch of rules in exchange for a place at the table and a bit of floor shared with 20-40 others. Carolyn has checked a lot of their eyes in past and knew that mostly they look vulnerable and sad and are smelly. She says some are weird but none were scary, just odd. These are people who haven't found or don't qualify for any other aid or shelters. Women are easier to place so they are 70% men. Most just need help for a short time. A few clients are chronic but most tend to find other things and leave. No one is turned away if they behave.
We thought it would be a non-event since it IS a non-event in the 6 other BEDS locations, and other PADS programs like it in the far western suburbs. Well, some of the church neighbors and a few of our newest apparently ex-members made it the event of the decade. They credit these homeless with monstrous destructive potential, and letting them wander around freely HERE is inconceivable. These residents asserted their right to complain to the village. The homeless have not been very vocal about their right to exist unhindered on public streets. Loitering statutes have been declared unconstitutional but conspiracy to deny the homeless their right of free access is not yet illegal, though it is pretty explicit at least verbally.
As a result, The Village of Western Springs is now pretty polarized. It is viewed by the Chicago Tribune and others as an asylum for heartless rich snobs. I have to admit, I am pretty proud of my hometown LaGrange's response to BEDS there(nobody came to the info meeting, real estate values are unchanged). The virulent reaction of the NIMBY's of WS has assured a steady stream of publicity. The 3rd or 4th TV crew since September will interview some clients (probably faceless) and tape a service Jan 9th. Now we're part of a PBS series on Church and State focusing on homeless and hunger issues.
We have found (for $30K worth of legal bills) that for several years now, churches are not a "permitted" use in Western Springs. This means local churches can only exist in a vaguely defined "conditional use" zoning status. The village, after hearing we were going to be hosting this program, and after a packed board meeting with about 30 people against and maybe 20 for, looked at their legal downside and found they could be sued if we managed to burn anybody up while operating a hotel without hotel fire alarm systems. So, they sued us on fire safety grounds. Our own lawyer wasn't up on the firecode. So, he didn't predict that a Cook County judge would agree with the village that the state fire codes define any transient accommodations same as a hotel. Badda-Bing! We had a court order against hosting BEDS until we had a firecall system installed for $20K. The system's in and BEDS is on. Oh yeah, and we had to sign $19K worth of firedoor contracts too to get the order lifted.
We are losers for thinking that it's worse for homeless to freeze in a culvert than take the risk of sleeping in a brick church, with two volunteers awake watching them all night, with battery powered smoke detectors, a block from the fire station. Homeless and their sympathizers just won't understand proper risk management.
The judge didn't say it that way, but that's the way it is. He's a loser for being used as a tool when a fire safety liability issue can be used in the service of paranoia and hypocrisy. We've had teenagers, Girl Scouts, and various touring groups sleeping overnight every year and nobody waved any red flags until this time. I guess none of those chaperones or teenagers could ever have been smoking.
Boy, it sure feels good to be helping those homeless. We just blew $69K to make sure no homeless get burned up sleeping in our brick church. Have we made enough fuss over them yet? Nope. We can still fight the conditional use issue. That's somewhere $20-100K worth of legal fees. And don't forget the $1000 to apply for the conditional use permit. Hmmm. Now we're somewhere in the $90-170K range. And that's just our side, don't forget the Village doesn't get their legal services free. They've probably spent $50K, and we could take them to $150K if they don't blink. Well, that's maybe $10 per resident. Maybe they won't even miss it.
Those against it hoped we'd never spend that much dough for the privilege of helping 30 or 40 homeless people.
The homeless folks never asked us to do that, either. They sure as heck didn't ask to be in the limelight. Is our pissing contest with the village really what they'd want? They are hard to pin down on that one since the average stay is less than 2 weeks, but it's safe to assume they have better things to fuss over.
Western Springs officials have not taken any leadership stands here. All they've done is let their lawyers lead them down the path of most litigation to avoid any risk of the big negligence claim way down a road we may never see. I concede the logical possibility is there, but it was convenient that it allowed them to put the squeeze on us now.
Well hey, that's what zoning is for, to squeeze out the undesirable elements that crop up occasionally. It's reassuring to know that homelessness, like Christianity, is just a passing thing. Sometimes both have a little problem knowing where they are welcome.
We should just go away quietly, we don't belong in Western Springs.The WS ministerium just blinked. They were right behind us but now the majority want peace. They said, "apply for the conditional use"
Well, do we? Given our negative growth and small size, in 20 years we could pass away as a church. We were on the ropes before this mess started.
Sometimes I wanna say we should go join LaGrange Methodist and help them build more room for BEDS. And shake any WS dust off our sandals. Or at least propose it to the ministerium. Maybe we could just abandon the church for a few years, and leave the doors unlocked. Then there'd be plenty of room for the homeless, and they could try homesteading while the pissing contest continues for a few years.
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