The most precious gifts
Perhaps the most famous gifts were those given by the Wise Men to the infant Jesus. They brought gold, which was a gift given to royalty. They brought frankincense, a gift reserved for deity. And they brought myrrh, a spice for a person who was going to die. These gifts were symbolic of the Savior's earthly mission. Even as a newborn, his future was foretold.
The gospel is one of the most precious gifts that anyone can give. It is the good news that Jesus, our Savior, was born and lived and died. His resurrection secured our immortality and His life stands as a testament to faith. Because He lived, we can live, too. Because He died, we will not know eternal death. This is THE most powerful blessing there is.
I shared my testimony with you on a different page of this website, but I want to share a recent event also. It is what I call a "faith promoting" experience. While I do not have all the answers, I do know that the ultimate answer to any question is "Rely on the Savior. Have faith and endure to the end." And recent experiences in my life have only solidified that belief.
Those who know me are already aware that I spent the past 1 1/2 years struggling with secondary infertility. I have a wonderful son from a brief first marriage, but after two miscarriages last year, I was beginning to believe that I would never have more children. I began taking fertility drug treatments (Clomid) with little success. In October, I became despondant, believing that I couldn't handle the pain....but the ultimate pain was that felt by Jesus on the cross....and everything else pales in comparison.
I gave up prayer for a few weeks....and slowly felt myself growing cold, and ultimately numb, inside. I was mad at God for allowing me to suffer. I was mad at women who conceived so easily and couldn't understand my pain. I was mad at everyone and every thing. It was a very dark place to be, and I am ashamed to admit that I spent quite a bit of time in that pit of despair and anger.
Bit by bit, I realized that God hadn't gone anywhere. I HAD. I had given up a piece of my soul for a lie. I began to read the story of Hannah (1 Samuel) and felt her pain and struggle for a baby. She didn't give up and like Job, she didn't curse God. She kept praying and believing that her faith would be rewarded. I began to believe that maybe my faith would be rewarded, too. It is only after a trial of our faith that the blessings will come.
After a month of sadness and anger, I began praying again. Hesitantly, at first. I was humbled by my experience....and was ashamed to be approaching my Father in prayer after my behavior. But I did it anyway. I began feeling the pain and sorrow and anger retreat. Eventually, I prayed that HIS will be done, and that I would be given the courage to face it. I begged for forgiveness for my "hard heartedness" and vowed to praise Him no matter what the outcome. A few weeks later, I found out that I was pregnant. I am now expecting twins in the summer of 2000.
Do I think that the promised blessing came after that prayer? I don't know. Not every woman who prays earnestly will be given her desires in this life. What filled my heart with peace was not the news of a pregnancy, but my decision to relinquish control to God. I have friends who are struggling with infertility, who have spent years in prayers that have gone unanswered. But each prayer IS heard.
My gift to you this holiday season would be to remember that Christ is our Savior and that the gospel is eternal and real and perfect. Trust in the Savior. Pray. Keep the faith. Endure to the end. And realize that no matter how dark the place you may find yourself, the Light is closer than you think. Have a blessed Christmas and may the coming year bring you health, joy and peace.
Since this is the Christmas season, a time when we celebrate the birth of Christ our Savior, I thought the most appropriate "lesson" for the month would be about gifts.... Not the kind you can buy in the store, but the kind that warms your heart during the cold times of life.