As in all things, it is best to start at the beginning of the story. So here I present something very special to me.It is my journey from darkness into the light of truth....
In the late 1980s, I was a Southern Baptist. I had first found parts of the gospel in high school, when I became friends with a brown-haired, thoughtful girl named Denise. She was always happy...and I wanted to know why. After many days of sitting behind her, we began talking...and I became interested in finding out what made her feel the way she did.
My mom was not very religious, and family members that we knew were semi-active in their own belief systems. My mom did not "go for" the traditional Catholic upbringing, but instead focused her energy on New Age and Eastern philosophies. Coming from that type of a backround, I was "ripe" for anything!
I was baptized into the Baptist faith in 1988, but never felt that complete "knowing" that I had been searching for. I was left with a lot of questions, and hungry for answers. I knew that there was a God and that He took a personal interest in me. I knew that His son was crucified....and that being Christian was a very special thing. But still...there was still that "inner knowing" that was lacking.
In December 1990, my 15 year old cousin Michelle was shot and killed by a classmate..and life as I knew it had changed forever. I remember sitting in her mom's room, listening to people crying...and hearing her mom ask why God, if He were so loving, would allow Michelle to be slaughtered mercilessly. I didn't have any answers...but I did have the power of prayer. Silently, I asked God to give me a response.
And it was if a candle had been lit in the middle of a blackout. I felt warm...and peaceful. I answered her questions in a way that she could understand...and in a way that I could not have done without the Spirit of God helping me. For a brief moment, I had felt what I had been searching for. But the moment passed, and so did the feeling.
Years later, I was going through a divorce, with bitter feelings on both sides. There was a couple who had moved in across the street (BRIAN AND PAWNEACE MILLER...THANK YOU!) They had a special needs child and yet were the happiest people I had ever known.
One day, while talking to Pawneace, we began discussing religion and the concept of eternal progression. She and her husband never mentioned the Book of Mormon or any of the words which seemed so foreign to me then, yet are precious to me now. But it wasn't their words that drew me...it was the feeling that I got when they spoke. A feeling of "oh yes...I remember this" and a sudden sense of peace. Once again, what had been lost for so long was found.
I did not even know they were Mormon when I first began speaking to them. I knew I wanted whatever it was that they had. Eventually, they sent two missionaries over (ELDER NEAL AND ELDER PEDERSON...THANK YOU!) They taught me the discussions...and I knew it was the right thing for me.
But because I was going through problems in my marriage, which led to a divorce in November of 1995, the missionaries told me that they could not baptize me. They wanted my personal life to be resolved one way or the other...and they wanted me to know that I made the decision based on the truth and not merely on an emotional level. And when they said that, I knew I was not some number in a book...but a person to them. Oddly enough, it was the denial of being baptized at that time that strengthened my testimony.
After moving to California, I made a series of bad choices (one of which was the move itself because of the circumstances). But when I committed myself to doing things God's way, everything fell into place. I was baptized on June 2, 1996. My son, then 3 1/2, was standing near the font and burst out crying because he thought I was going to drown. When someone told him that it was ok, that Heavenly Father was making me clean and pure...he smiled and said "Well, that's good!" Then, I was confirmed a member of the church...and that feeling I had longed for was mine...
During that year, I made some wonderful, life long friends (PETER AND SHERRI KNOBLOCH...I LOVE YOU!) and learned a lot about myself and my relationship to Heavenly Father. I went through the San Diego temple on June 5, 1997 and was sealed in the same temple on Sept 26, 1997 to a wonderful man, who has been a patient and loving father & husband.
Currently, I am the Primary secretary in my ward...and am a visiting teacher. I am a part time nurse, and a full time mother & wife. I am a daughter of God and a happy woman. I had never before been as happy as I have been since the day I stepped into the baptismal waters in June 1996.
There are links on my homepage to teach you about our church, if you have questions. But please know this: God lives and He loves each and everyone of us. The atoning sacrifice of Jesus was NECESSARY for us to one day return home. As surely as I write this, I know that the Book of Mormon is a witness of Christ, even as is the Bible. Joseph Smith was the true prophet of the Lord, who restored the fulness of the gospel in these latter days. Currently, Gordon B Hinckley stands at the head of God's church: the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
How do I know this? How do you know that wind that blows is real? Do you see it? No, but you feel its effects. I know that this is true and I cannot..indeed WILL NOT...ever deny that this is so. Peace and joy are mine. May the same blessing be yours to enjoy. I write these things in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
If you have any questions or if I can help in any way, please email me.